Chapter 319CleoThe point where you need to know how you feel and where you are feeling wise so that you don't get held emotionally hostage is the worse you don't know how to feel about someone because you've been through so much with them and you don't want to let them down , or disappoint them in some way.When you get married you learn different dimensions of intimacy the before you get married you need to know yourself inside out and be comfortable with the demons that you have inside of you however I'm still struggling to figure out how I addict To be in a full-blown relationship not someone that I really do love her but I am still yet to discover how we should communicate in such a way that we both understand each other and understand each other's language and I can attribute my not communicating properly with Michelangelo to not going out on dates with him. When you asked me yesterday if I wanted to go off
Chapter 320 Angelo The one thing I've always operated on is stability and loyalty. The guy you immediately know what works for you and what doesn't work for you, what makes you tick and what turns you on in a woman. I hate to admit it but the perfectionist in me has always kept a list of things that I look for when someone and what the ideal person will be, who the ideal person should be like. Cleopatra ticked every box every category and some but I have to admit that I haven't been the best person ever and I haven't treated her the way she deserves to be treated it took someone showing me what I'm missing out on to realise what I've been taking for granted all along and you know very well that if you take something for granted you might actually lose it but when you get it back you appreciate it more than the first time you lost it . As much as there is a good side to me I also have a bad side to me the part of me that wants to hurt someone before they hurt me and when I asked m
Chapter 321 Cleo If anybody asked me how I was doing today I would tell them that I'm not gay but then again I'm not okay. I understand what's going on and I am very fine but I'm not fine at the same time I don't think the pain of ever losing a child goes away it never goes away. However I did learn that; it is only under earth that we can experience a wake because the wake is a sign of rebirth . I've said it before when I'm going to say again that people never really die, they are just in a different universe and a different time and space and I used to believe that there is a portal that leads to a place where loved ones could always visit the ones that they miss and come back to earth . I've always feared waking up and finding everyone I've loved gone hasn't there is no trace there is no way for them to be found and russellville I wouldn't know where to start to look for them and then again my husband goes in pulls a stunt that he knows will turn my world upside down . It's un
Chapter 322 Angelo You can never get over the pain of losing a child. It's the worst pain you can ever feel as a parent. The pain never goes away and even though you have children , you fear that they might suffer the same fate that the first child you lost may suffer and therefore you will do everything in your power to keep them safe . Fun things that you didn't expect happen you find yourself trying to balance or trying to cope with what happened and the worst thing is that when preventable things happen you stop blaming yourself and asking yourself of things that you could have done better and hopefully that might have changed the way you hoped things would pan out. I never want to admit fault until things get worse to the point where it's so hard to repair what was broken . Right now I think I might have just done something that was out of my control. It wasn't in my control because after the turbulence happened. I made sure that everybody was okay and my daughter won't stop
Chapter 323CleoI'm usually calm and I'm usually level-headed but in recent days I've been on edge and I haven't been myself lately and it's starting to get to me to the point where I just don't know what to feel anymore because I've been suppressing all my feelings all this time and I think it's about time that I refocus my feelings and be the person I once was.Have you ever been in a relationship where you think that this is the right relationship for you and that you finally found the one because at some point I'd felt like that with the person that I had married . I thought and I still think that he is the right person but there are some aspects of the relationship that I have been neglecting to the point where I don't think that I can't click them anymore because you can only sacrifice for so much and for so long until you find out that; you are doing more damage to yourself by suppressin
Chapter 324 Angelo There is a moment in between waking up and falling asleep where everything seems to be silent and everything seems to be peaceful it is true that The guilty get no sleep and no matter how many times I tried to fight sleep sleep keeps on coming back to attack me and it's my body's way of telling me that I need to take a break and I need to just breathe for a little bit sometimes I pass out to the point where I don't know how I even passed out but last night I couldn't sleep and the only reason I couldn't sleep was because my wife had left me an emotional number I didn't know what to do but I need to do something big and in my trying to do something big I made the mistake of not making sure that I called my uncle and told him that I was coming to Johannesburg I knew that he was going to ask me if I was with my wife and kids. I wish I had told my wife; what I was thinking before I did it. She normally thinks of everything , from start to finish and then the in-betwe
Chapter 325Cleo I'm no stranger to moving around or finding new places to live but this is feeling that you get and it's a feeling of nostalgia that you get when you go back to a place that you left all the memories start coming back everything you've been through starts we're playing in your mind and you end up not knowing which memory to take or keep because every memory that you have lives rent-free and runs riot in your mind.I'm not the person that I was 4 years ago A lot has happened on lot has changed and there are days when I feel like I didn't sign up for the life I have and there are days when I am thankful for the life I have and when you caught in between the two it's kind of hard to figure out where you stand emotionally and mentally mentally I'm strong but emotionally I feel like I'm an emotional basket Case because with everything that's happening with husband and kids. I never in a million years did I dream that Michelangelo would do what he did to me and if he hadn'
Chapter 326AngeloAs someone's friend you know when the person you trust is stalling or buying you time . With Brent , I am always confused because; like his brother he is loyal to me and he knows something I don't do is take any nonsense. When I asked him about what he knew with regards to Dante and my wife he came out with the truth and nothing but the truth it turns out that his brother is actually good friends with Dante tennis matches he is loyal to me he's also loyal to his other friend I just couldn't quite put my hand on how Dante was able to do what he did the only way he was able to do that was if you had an inside Man and it's the real people that you trust that are the ones who betray you I haven't charged but it seems as if somebody has been pulling the strings and making me do things that I didn't want to do it directly so this time after hearing the truth because I know for a fact that Brent always tells the truth no matter t