"Can you hurry the hell up?" John hisses.
"I have literally one table waiting on their drinks," I point out to my boss. "So what, exactly, am I hurrying for?"
"Probably because you were late..."
"Seven minutes late," I interrupt.
"So now everything is backed up. Maybe I should have let Laury take your tables like she asked to."
I look across the dining room at Laury, and she gives me a small smile. She hates this job as much as I do, so I know if she offered to handle my tables, it was only because she was trying to diffuse John threatening to fire me, again. Because we both need this job. Her to pay for school, me to pay for, well, everything. John is an asshole, but the pay is good, and the tips are great. The people who come here aren't too bad either. So, it's mostly just John that makes us hate it. It's like he wants to make sure we suffer as much as possible for every dollar we make an hour.
"Here we go," I say as I reach table twelve. I smile at the people while I put down their coffees, lattes, cups of teas, muffins, and donuts before asking, "Anything else you need right now?"
"Nothing. Thanks," one of the women answers.
"I'll be back around in a few."
I begin to walk back toward the kitchen, but finding John watching me, a scowl on his face, I turn toward where one of my tables just emptied instead. Is it my job to clear the dishes away? No, but I'll gladly do it if it keeps me away from John. Because when he's not scowling, he's leering. I prefer the scowl but am in no mood to deal with it right now.
Bringing the heavy bucket of dishes to the hot kitchen, the card seems to burn in my pocket, begging me to use it. I’d looked at it almost my entire break an hour ago. Nothing but a number and first name on it, not telling me much more than I learned in the elevator. I'd turned it over again and again, as if new words would appear on it the more I did it. But no, it remained the same. Lawson, and ten digits. That's all.
Even as I convinced myself all over again that I cannot possibly accept his offer, I’d still pulled out my phone in the booth I sat in and searched for a hotel. Not any hotel I could afford either. No, the ones I could probably never afford to stay in. It would be a test of sorts... If he could truly afford to give me the amount of money he'd offered, then he would certainly be able to afford a hotel that charges $884 for a night. But that’s if I were going to text him…which I’m not.
Much like Law, though, I can't get the room out of my head now. The pictures of rooms with large beds, balconies overlooking the city, bathtubs that could fit four... or just me and Law. I almost scoff. That man wants to do anything but sit around in a bathtub with me. Maybe fuck me in it, but not sit in a bunch of bubbles. My mind is sure to show me images of all the places he could fuck me in the room, though. Right in the center of that huge bed. Bent over the couch. On the balcony, all the people below us able to hear my screams.
But... who says I'll be screaming at all? Or moaning? Or gasping? The sex could be horrible for all I know. But my mind and my body tell me that's a lie. He exudes sex appeal, lust, desire. Everything from his eyes, to his smile, to the way he took off his damn jacket tells me I would leave that hotel room satisfied. But I'm not going, even though every single part of me is curious about what it would feel like to be under him, above him, hismouth on me, my mouth on him. A shudder rushes through me at the visions flooding me.
"I want to be wherever your mind is taking you right now." I hear Laury laugh behind me. "It looks like a damn good place."
"Any place is better than here." I sigh as I turn around to face her. "Thanks for offering to cover my tables earlier."
She winks. "You know I got you. How's our girl?"
"Same, which I guess is a good thing."
"Did you hear back from that charity you said the hospital has?"
"Heard from them this morning. They said they only cover up to $5,000."
"Which wouldn't even put a dent in the cost of everything."
"Exactly. Ka tried to hide her disappointment when I told her, but it was easy to see since I felt the same."
"Well, I got seven hundred in tips last week. I know it isn't much, but..."
"I appreciate every single cent, although I don't think I'll ever stop feeling bad for taking your money."
"Oh, stop it. I may not have known you guys long, but I know you both well enough to know you deserve the help, and Ka deserves a kidney."
We all met in college a year ago. Kamila works, or worked, in the admissions office, until those douchebags let her go when she started missing work too often because of her illness. I was going there for graphic design and Laury for hospitality. When me and Kamila moved here for her job, and me switching schools to stay with her, we’d come to this diner for dinner most nights, and met Laury. It was easy for me and Kamila to become fast friends with her. She's funny as hell, has a sarcasticcomeback for everything, and a heart of gold under all the wit. She helped me get the job here, knowing I could really use the tips, and that the bills were now my sole responsibility, and has been giving me her tips ever since she'd learned that the hospital was demanding payment before they'd put Kamila on the transplant list.
I wish I had the option not to take her money, but I have no other... Wait, don't I? I look at Laury out the corner of my eye. I know I can talk to her about Law and everything that happened in the elevator, that she won't judge in the least. But how the hell do you even start a conversation about that?
"So say, hypothetically..." I begin.
She chuckles. "Which means it isn't hypothetical at all. Go on."
I narrow my eyes at her, and she just smiles. "Say there was a man offering you a shit ton of money, I'm talking enough to pay for the surgery, the bills, move, maybe even go back to school."
"I'm sold."
"I didn't even say what you would have to do for it yet."
"I don't give a shit. He wants me to let him lick my feet, sure. He wants me to lick him from head to toe, done. Shit, he wants me to lick his balls right after he gets back from the gym, I'm on my knees."
"Eww, Laury, that's disgusting."
"And absolutely something I would do if it got me the money to take care of myself and the people I love."
"Wouldn't it be... shameful? To take someone's money to do, really anything with them?"
"Why shameful?" She furrows her brows. "You and whoever this hypothetical man is are two consenting adults. You'redoing something you wanna do... You do wanna do it, right? Otherwise, you wouldn't be asking me."
"I definitely want to do it."
"I think you chose to lie to him about how you feel and are lying to yourself that you'll be okay without him," Laury tells me."Can't you ever just let a girl delude herself, Laury?""A friend would never." But she says it with a smile.I look down at Shawn, because it seems easier to look at him than at the truth staring back at me in Laury and Sarah's faces. The truth that I should have been honest with him. That I should have told him how I felt and asked him if there was anything in his heart for me, or offered him an opportunity to give me his truth and say that he wasn't interested in that with me. I should have given him a chance. A chance. But now, it's too late."I love him," I say softly, if only because I feel like I need to say it to someone. I could only ever say it to Jackson while he slept. I need to tell someone awake. But even as I repeat the words, I still don't look at Sarah and Laury. I can't. "I love him. I love him. And I'll never have him.""Oh, don't cry, or I
Something he used to make a meal for me back when he still looked at me with warmth in his eyes. I'm sure I won't find that warmth there if I see him now.I grab a bagel from the counter and don't even bother to toast it, just keep it clenched between my teeth as I head for my shoes. Then I'm looking back at my house. It's been filled with the last of Jackson's presence these past few days. Both consoling me and haunting me. Leaving here today feels like I'm losing all of that the moment I set foot outside. But I need to let it go. Let him go. So I step outside and shut the door behind me.I blast music the entire way to Sarah's house to keep myself from thinking... much. But once I'm in the house, hugging Sarah and Laury, getting to hold Shawn again, my thoughts aren't so troublesome anymore. Or at least, I thought they weren't bothering me as much until Laury asks if I'm okay for the third time."Yeah." I smile at her. "I'm feeling much better."But her eyebrows only furrow, and she
He tosses my phone to the bed as if it's offended him, scorched him, and runs his fingers through his hair."So what the fuck was everything we just did?" He looks everywhere but at me as he speaks. "A mistake? Just something you gave into?" He stops, going so still that I don't dare to breathe in the silence that suddenly fills the room. Then he turns, eyes narrowing, but I can see the suspicion in them clearly. "Was this goodbye sex? Was that what that look in your eyes was about? You doing something you felt you had to do one more time?""No!" I exclaim. "I wanted that. I wanted every single thing that happened.""So what the fuck is the problem? Because you're telling me you wanted it, still want what we do, but your text is saying we can't do it anymore.""This just isn't... working for me anymore," I pathetically lie."You mean, I'm not working for you."Why does he look... hurt?"I never said that," I say low."You don't have to. You clearly haven't lost your desire for what we
God, what kind of person am I that that image turns me on. Makes me want to push him just to see if he'll actually do it. He will. I know he will. And that's a part of what turns me on most. That he can hurt me and please me at the same time."What are you waiting for?" he asks as he drops back down to the pillows, hands going back to my hips, flexing there, urging me on.Swallowing, I rise up to reach between our bodies. When my hand slides over his pubic area, I can feel my wetness there, all over him, warm, slick. It's on his cock too and coats my hand as I wrap it around him. I position him at my opening and begin to lower.His eyes become half-lidded as I slide down on him. That stretch that I love so much makes me hiss, giving me sparks of pain until I'm seated on him. We've never done this before, me on top, looking down at him. Doesn't this mean I have the power now? Me controlling him for once? As if he can hear my thoughts, his eyes narrow at me, his nostrils flare, and his
"Yeah, a tease and a whore. Look at you.""Fuck you," I shout in his face.He stops sliding into me but crashes his mouth down on mine. His kiss takes my breath away, makes my hands move from his shoulders, inching toward the back of his head, wanting to hold him to me so his tongue can't stop meeting mine, so I don't losethe feeling of his lips. But they still because no, this is the last time. I need to make it everything we could ever be, everything I will never be able to find with someone else. So, I stop kissing him back, and bite down on his tongue. He hisses as he tears his mouth away. The red of his blood is on the crease of his lips as he looks down at me in surprise. And lust is there, always lust, because it's clear he liked that as much as I did, that he likes the taste of blood in his mouth as much as I do."Such a pretty mouth should not do such dirty things," he snaps. "But if you want your mouth to be dirty, I'll make it fucking filthy."He pulls out of my pussy, leav
A shiver races down my spine, and Jackson’s smirk tells me he doesn't miss it. Heat rushes through me, all seeming to settle at my bare pussy, making me all too aware of just how ready I am for him to take me. I lick my lips at just the thought of any part of him between my thighs, and his eyes track my tongue's movement. Then, in an instant, his face changes, from smiling to stern, and I know playful Jackson is gone. In his place is the man who makes me give him control over every inch of me, whether I want to or not.He shoots forward and before my gasp has even fully left my lips, his mouth is there, stealing the sound from me while his hands push against my shoulders. My back painfully collides with the dresser, it's handles digging into my skin, but I can't focus on that when his tongue is demanding entry into my mouth, intruding past my lips so I have no choice but to submit to our kiss and open for him. But, as good as it feels, my guilt is present, telling me that I shouldn't