I never thought I'd feel this way once again.
It has been three years since he was taken away from me. Those years we're spent on longing. I almost believe I'm no longer capable of loving. Well, almost.
Not until I met Prime. He made me feel I can still cling to the things I'd forgotten. He made me realize what acceptance can give us. And there will always be a part of me, thanking him for that.
We decided to spend some time at Lunti. Well, for the past few days, we frequently go here. Halos dito kami tumatambay 'pag pareho kaming free.
He became extra on everything.
Not to mention his gestures that turned to be sweeter than usual.
I started to examine the things encompassing our position. I can hear the wind whispering that seemed to be a lullaby in my ears, the moisture t
A/N: Sorry for the long wait. I've been busy with school. I assure you I'll be updating as much as possible. ENJOY READING!
"Ano ba kasing nangyari at hindi ka na naman natuloy kahapon?"Shillem opened the door on the driver's seat. I noticed she's wearing a peach elbow-length sleeve dress that runs down inches above her knee. Pansin ko lang na nitong mga lumipas na araw, napapadalas ang pagsuot niya ng may manggas. Her wavy brown hair follows the rhythm of the whispering wind. Hawak nito ang pink na paper bag na napansin kong pinupukol n'ya ng matatamis na ngiti.Katakot, nababaliw na yata."Ano 'yan?" Nguso ko sa hawak nito habang tinataasan s'ya ng kilay.She grinned. Umaliwalas ang itsura n'ya. "Cookies, para kay Babi!"Ano? I can't believe her! Noon ay wala naman s'yang pakialam sa mga lalaking lumalandi sa kanya. She even said that she despises those who give gifts to their crushes. Ngayon, kinakain n'ya tuloy ang mga sinabi n'ya."Hindi ka naman gan'yan sa mga ka-fling mo dati, anong pinakain sa'yo no'n?""Duh! Ang technology nga nag-uupgrade, ako pa kaya!"Napangiwi ako. "Uso rin i-upgrade ang lab
"Ang bigat naman nito, Gail!"It took minutes for Shillem to went down after I call her. Mapungay ang mga mata nito nang makarating, halatang galing sa pagtulog. Sa totoo lang ay medyo nahihiya na ako, lagi ko na lang kasi itong inaabala. Pero wala akong magagawa, wala akong mahihingan ng tulong maliban sa kan'ya, masyado nang malalim ang gabi. Hindi ko rin naman maiuuwi si Prime dahil hindi ko alam ang sa kanila.Napaisip ako. Oo nga, ano? Marami s'yang alam tungkol sa akin pero hindi ko man lang alam kung saan s'ya nakatira. Pinagduduhan ko na tuloy kung girlfriend n'ya ba talaga ako.That thought remained in my mind. Saka lamang ako natauhan no'ng narinig ko na ang sunod-sunod na mahihinang buntong hininga ni Shillem nang nasa loob na kami ng elevator. I even got a quick a sight of her—frowning."Mas lalo kong nararamdaman na single ako…" tunog nagmamaktol iyon at alam kong kahit na pabiro n'ya iyong sinabi, may hibla ng kalungkutan ang boses n'ya.I looked at her apologetically. "
I was thankful he didn't hear me when I muttered Nana's name. Sa tagal naming magkasama sa banda, ngayon ko lang 'yon nalaman. Sa mga nagdaang taon kasi, hindi rin naman ako gaanong nagtatanong sa personal n'yang buhay. And knowing him, hindi rin 'yon magsasabi hangga't hindi mo tinatanong.I wonder how Nana is. And the reason why she left keeps bugging me.But I'm pretty sure she's happy. Mayroon s'yang mabait at malambing na anak.I was only twelve when she took care of me. Bilib na bilib pa s'ya sa akin no'n dahil imbis na pambatang palabas ang pinapanood ko, mga lalaking nagda-drums 'yon na s'yang ginagaya ko.Back then, I always think I'm way different from the people around me. Lahat ng mga kaklase ko sa elementarya ay nagpapayabangan pa ng makukulay na mga gamit, samantalang ako ay puro itim ang gamit at suot.I once wanted to drown myself in darkness.Sa murang edad ay naranasan ko nang umiyak tuwing gabi. I lost my mother. At alam kong malaking parte rin sa akin ang nawala.I
It's the usual day, I was adjusting the pedal when someone appeared on my side."Ready ka na para bukas?"It was Prime. Hindi ko alam kung bakit lagi n'ya akong kinakausap kahit na madalas ay tipid na ngiti lamang ang sagot ko."Hindi ko alam, medyo kinakabahan," tugon ko rito bago s'ya balingan ng tingin.Bagsak ang balikat, mapungay ang mga mata at bahagya itong nakanguso kaya kahit pilit ay ngumiti ako sa kan'ya.Did I just made him feel uneasy?But knowing Prime, hindi 'yon titigil hangga't hindi n'ya nakikita ang ngiti mo. And just like what he usually does, there it comes to his hands doing strokes on his brown curly hair."Sure ako na magiging maganda ang performance natin bukas! Syempre andito ako," he cheered me up with an instant wink.Napairap ako. Oo na, magaling ka na.Pero mins
A year ago...Here I am.Standing nearby the cliff that changed almost every aspect of me means being stabbed by thousands of daggers. A high humidity wet grassland just beneath my feet and the smell of Mid-June air is evident. It has been three years, yet until now, everything is still haunting my system.Ang hirap pala.Ang hirap tanggapin na wala na 'yong isa sa mahahalagang taong naniniwala sa kakayahan mo. I tried to forget about it, however, to no avail. I even lost interest in playing. Sleepless nights, books I've read dozens of times, the last thing I've heard before everything happened were just some of my company for the past few years. And yet the pain, the longing, it's still here, as if it's living in me.Every 13th of June, going here is my thing, bringing a bunch of yellow tulips and tossing it down to the cliff. It has been a routine to the point that this d
It feels like a dream. Never kong in-expect na magugustuhan n'ya ako dahil never din namang naging maganda ang trato ko sa kanya. Either I'll be a sarcastic bitch or a quiet one when he's talking to me. Sobrang hindi lang kapani-paniwala lalo na kapag inaalala ko ang mga nangyari noon.I noticed the gradual movement of the drumsticks on my hand as he walked towards my direction. Wala akong ibang naiisip noong mga oras na 'yon kung hindi ang paraan kung paano n'ya ako tingnan. Anong… gagawin ko?The tremor got even worsen when he's finally a few inches away. Why am I being like this?"Gail..." His eyes, they are so beautiful. I think it's the most innocent and beautiful pearls I've ever laid my eyes upon. It's captivating in such a way that you won't have any choices on what he asks you but say yes. "Please, gusto kong ligawan ka…"And when I nodded with that, without further
"Bente uno anyos na ako tapos gano'n pa rin s'ya kung magbawal sa akin! Hindi ko naman pinababayaan ang pag-aaral ko kahit hindi 'yon 'yong gusto kong course ah! I'm trying my best to make him proud… pero bakit kulang pa rin? Bakit gano'n Shillem? Masama ba akong anak..."She caressed my hair and hugged me tightly as if it transmits the urge to feel better.Sobrang sakit. Para akong pinasukan ng kung anong aparato sa dibdib dahil sa bigat nito. Hindi pa ba sapat lahat ng sinakripisyo ko para masunod ang gusto n'ya? All my life I've been doing what he asks me to do. Pero tangina naman… hindi naman ako makina na kayang gawin ang isang bagay ng paulit-ulit lalo na kung hindi ko naman gusto."Ssshhh. Mabuti kang anak, Gail. They may leave but I'm always here for you..." she mouthed and gave me a reassuring smile.Nangungusap ang mga mata n'ya at tila nagsasabing magiging maayos din
Days flew fast.Nagsimula na akong magtrabaho sa shop tulad ng napagkasunduan.Madali kaming nagkapalagayan ng loob ng mga katrabaho ko dahil na rin siguro halos malapit lang ang edad ko sa edad nila.Natunugan kong Civil Engineering din ang kinukuha ni Mel kaya nagtanong-tanong ako sa proseso ng pagsi-shift sa department nila. Ang sabi n'ya ay madali lang naman daw. 'Wag daw akong mag-alala dahil tutulungan n'ya ako.Sinagot ko lang s'ya ng maliit na ngiti. I don't wanna be indebted to someone I just met. Kaya hindi nakapagtatakang hindi ko maiwasang kabahan."Gail, paki-assist naman 'yung customer sa table 8."Natigilan ako nang marinig si Ate Ria. Nadatnan ko 'tong nagsasalin ng drinks sa lalagyan nang marating ko ang counter."Ikaw na ang bahala ha? I-seserve ko lang 'to!" narinig ko pang sabi n'ya bago ito mag