Chapter 12

I woke up with a start, my body covered in sweat and feeling like it was on fire. Despite the heat, I could see goosebumps all over my arms and legs through my copper-coloured lashes. I tried to calm myself down by focusing on my breathing, but my heart was still racing. It always did when I woke up from the Uprising nightmare that plagued my sleep. But this time, the sensation was different.

I was still too hot, so I clawed at my nightshirt, trying to remove it as quickly as possible. I felt like I was suffocating.

Suddenly, I felt someone’s arms around me, lifting me up and carrying me to another room. I was weightless, floating in the air.

I felt faint from the insane heat pulsing through me, but after a moment, something wrapped me in a cold envelope. I didn’t think I had a fever anymore. It was simply me swimming in the cool darkness.

As I regained my senses, I felt a gentle touch on my cheek, and I saw a blurry figure hovering over me. I realized that someone was washing my face with cold water, and it felt incredibly soothing. The coolness of the water on my skin was like a balm, and I started to relax. The gentle touch continued, moving from my cheek to my jaw and neck.

The room was filled with a sweet and comforting scent of lavender, which immediately put me at ease. I felt my scalp being massaged and let out a contented hum at the soothing touch. I sank lower into the cold, feeling my muscles loosen up.

Gradually, I opened my eyes and tried to focus on the person who was helping me. It was Xander, his soft, pale grey eyes gazing back at me. I had never seen them so clearly before. They had gold specs, almost swirling around the grey, but then darkened to their usual dark black-grey colour that I was familiar with.

 ”How are you feeling, Ida?” Xander asked in a hushed voice, the dark circles under his eyes catching my attention. I wondered if he had been missing sleep.

I groaned in response, trying to raise myself, and that’s when I realized that I was lying in a bathtub filled with iced water. The sudden realization explained why I felt so cold and refreshed.

My head rested on the tub rim, and I peeked down to see if I was naked. I exhaled when I noticed I was still wearing the nightshirt. It stuck wetly on the curves of my body.

“W-what happened?” My voice was rough, like I hadn’t drunk water in days.

“You’ve been in and out of consciousness for about two days,” Xander replied, placing his hands over me to help me out of the water. “I heard something fall loudly in your room when I returned from work and tried to get in, but the door was locked. So, I broke in and found you lying on the ground with bloody cuts all over your arms.”

I gazed at my arms, and deep gashes were visible. I must have cut myself with the broken oil lamp.

I let Xander lift me out of the water and stabilize me between his strong arms. I pressed my back to his chest. He didn’t seem to mind that his shirt was getting completely wet.

I lifted my feet out of the tub and stilled when I saw that the water had turned a dark brown colour. Xander had wet and cleaned my hair, and it had returned to its fiery glory. I quickly drained the bath water and hoped that the room’s dimness was enough to cover my hair’s wet, brown redness.

“Sorry,” he nonchalantly replied when he saw me fussing over my hair. “You were drenched in sweat, and I was told to keep your temperature down until you woke up. I thought I’d scrub your head to help you feel better once you felt better.” Xander shrugged and helped me to the bed, not caring that I was still wearing the soaked nightshirt.

Nothing in the room was familiar.

Through the soft glow of the oil lamps, My eyes were immediately drawn to the large oak dresser in front of the four-poster bed where I was sitting. Its intricate carvings and beautiful finish gave it an antique and regal feel.

To the right of the room, there was an arched doorway that led to a study. I could see the bookshelves lining the wall by the window, and the corner of a desk peeking through the open space. In the center of the bedroom, there was a medium-sized table that was covered in stacks of papers and charts. The walls were divided horizontally, with the bottom half being made of dark wood and the top half painted in a hunter-green colour. The dark wood gave the room a sense of warmth and comfort, while the green colour brought a sense of calmness and serenity.

My fingers ran over the silky soft material of the bedcovers. They also had a green sheen to them.

Was I in his room?

Xander fluffed a pillow and propped me on it, leaning my back on the headboard.

His hand went to his face and rubbed his fingers on his forehead; he exhaled and opened his mouth to say something but quickly closed it and searched my face.

Xander sighed and dropped his hand on mine. “These last few weeks have been… difficult for me.” He gently squeezed my fingers. “I can only imagine it has been the same for you?”

I nodded. They had been excruciating. Then I remembered the book and took a long breath before asking Xander the question burning my lips. “What am I to you?”

Xander closed his eyes and sank lower on the bed. He had also backed himself upon the headboard next to me.

“Mate.”

“Mate,” I repeated the word.

I felt the definiteness of it. I knew the truth of that simple word deep inside my bones.

“So, you’re a…”

Xander chuckled. “I’m a Lycan.” A smile spread on his soft face. All the worry I had seen in him seemed to have vanished. “I’m happy that this is your reaction. I thought you would have run away.”

I still could, I thought. But being next to Xander seemed right. It resembled the same feeling I had when I started reusing my magic—like a piece of me was reattached, although I was unaware it had been missing in the first place. But that wasn’t the only reason why I stayed. I was finally with someone like me… different. An Unnatural.

I still didn’t understand how he could be a Lycan.

Xander saw me worrying at my bottom lip and offered an explanation. “My father isn’t Duke Kestrel.” His tone was calm. “My mother found her Lycan mate while her father was about to marry her off to Kestrel. It perfectly aligned the timing of my conception with their wedding, so she could pass me off as his son and heir.” Xander’s smile turned sour. “When my grandfather heard a Lycan had claimed his daughter as his mate, he ordered my father’s execution and kept the whole thing a secret. I never met the man.”

My heart ached, knowing he had to live with hiding his true self from his “father.”

Maybe we weren’t so different after all?

“I’ve been roaming the country for years trying to find you.” His gaze returned to my face and softened. “When I first smelled your scent, it was coming from girls who I later learned were sharing a room with you.”

I unconsciously trailed my fingers along his arm, inviting tingles that danced under my skin.

“When I brought them up to my floor and smelled them more, I noticed the smell was faint. So, I paid off their indentures for the scare I gave them and sent them off.”

I observed the hairs on his arms raised by my touch and kept stroking him lightly.

“I think it annoyed your head maid that I kept freeing her workers, so she eventually stopped putting girls in your room and made you stop cleaning areas that I frequented until you happened to work my quarters, and I smelled you.” Xander moved his head near my neck and breathed deeply through his nose. “I was so happy in that instant that I kissed you. But after, I didn’t know how you’d react, so I went to my mother, who proposed this arrangement. When we touched, it was like I had fireworks under my skin, and I knew I had to make you mine. But I didn’t know my presence on this floor would affect you so much.”

He gestured to the surrounding air, and I gathered he was referring to the supposed “pheromones” described in the book I read.

“So,” I tempted. “When you appeared in my bathroom…”

“My Lycan smelled your arousal and went crazy.” His voice had returned to a husky growl, and his eyes were swirling in blackness. “Sorry, it’s not always easy holding him on a tight leash, especially after we found you.”

“And the eyes?” I placed my hand at the side of his temple, curling my finger on a strand of his messy black hair.

“They become black when my Lycan surfaces. It’s hard to control the beast whenever you’re near me,” was all Xander had time to say before I pulled his face and crashed my lips against his.

I was desperate to finally feel and taste all of him. It was all I thought about in the last few weeks.

Xander welcomed my tongue as I parted his lips with it. Savouring the sweet taste of his mouth on mine. My kiss was demanding, but our need for one another was even more so. It was like I didn’t have control over my mind and body. Xander was the only thing I could focus on.

I curled my hands behind his neck, moving my legs over him to each side, straddling him, and deepened our kiss.

I slowed when I felt his rigid arousal under me and teasingly ground my hips along his delicious length.

“Faiths, Ida.” Xander’s eyes were wide with excitement as he grabbed my butt and pressed my bottom even closer to him.

The tightness of his pants seemed uncomfortable. I removed one hand from his neck and slipped it under his shirt, sliding it over his muscular stomach until I placed it over his heart. It was hammering underneath my fingertips.

We both stopped and looked at each other, panting.

“If we don’t stop now,” Xander sucked in a breath, almost as if hurting, “I don’t think I’ll be able to stop myself.”

“Then don’t,” I replied breathlessly, pulling his shirt over his head.