Mag-log inNikolai Kenji Ivanshov
I sat at the head of the long table, my hands flat against the polished wood, while the elders stared at me from their half circle. Dark suits. Hard faces. Years of power carved into every line. Behind me, Ivan, my Beta stood at my right, silent like always. Mikhail, my Delta, at my left, tense and alert.
I should have been paying attention.
But my mind kept wandering somewhere it shouldn't.
Red hair.
It didn't make sense. Humans didn't have red hair. They were all pale. White haired. Fragile. Ordinary. Every single one of them. I would have remembered if I'd ever seen one like her. I was sure of it. But when I closed my eyes, there she was.
The way she looked at me. Not begging. Not submissive.
Hateful. Angry. Broken.
Her hazel eyes burned into my head, sharp and defiant even when she was kneeling in chains on my dungeon floor. There was something familiar about them. Something that bothered me in a way I didn't like.
I hated not knowing why.
"Alpha."
Ivan's voice cut through my train of thoughts, his voice was low but enough for me to hear. He leaned in closer, keeping his voice low. "The elders are waiting."
I blinked and looked back at the room.
Mikhail leaned toward me slightly. "They're asking about Nightclaw."
I nodded once, slow, like I'd been listening the whole time.
"The Nightclaw Pack was attacked three nights ago," I said calmly. "They're closest to the border. The one that separates us from Vampire territory."
One of the elders shifted in his seat, grey eyes narrowing. "Nightclaw has always been weak. Their Alpha can't defend his own borders. Why should we waste warriors on their failures?"
A low murmur rippled through the council.
I felt irritation spike in my chest.
"We're the largest pack in the territories," I said, my voice harder now. "We can spare a few hundred of our own warriors without weakening ourselves."
Another elder scoffed. "And when the vampires come for us next? How would we protect ourselves if we send all our troops?" He asked and I felt irritation in my guts, stupid, all of them were.
I leaned forward, pressing my hands harder against the table, imagining it was their necks. "If Nightclaw falls, the vampires will have a foothold deep inside wolf territory. From there, they'll pressure the other packs. One by one. You think they'll stop once they taste blood?"
Silence.
Some of the elders looked at each other. Others just stared ahead, stubborn.
"They've always wanted more land," I continued. "They've never hidden it. The witches hold the biggest territory. The humans sit in the middle, weak and neutral, they have no allies, no troops and no protection. Nightclaw is a gateway to our lands. If we abandon them, we're inviting invasion."
One elder finally nodded slowly. "And you think this attack was ordered by Vaelor."
I didn't hesitate. "Yes."
The name seemed to darken the room.
"Vaelor Abandonato Duskbane," I said. "Lord of the Western Court. He doesn't act without purpose. And he doesn't strike without planning what comes next."
Mikhail shifted behind me, his voice tight. "We've been seeing more movement near the western border. Scouts are reporting unusual patrol patterns. Vampires don't move like that unless they're preparing something."
Ivan spoke next, calm and measured. "Nightclaw has already lost thirty wolves. Their Alpha requested assistance."
Another elder frowned. "Or maybe this is a trap. Maybe Vaelor wants to draw us out."
I breathed out through my nose, keeping my temper in check. "Vaelor and I have been at war for years. This didn't start with Nightclaw. It didn't even start with me."
My jaw tightened at the memory I wouldn't speak out loud.
Blood on stone floors. Her screams.
The elders went quiet again.
I could feel Ivan's steady presence behind me. Mikhail's tension, coiled and ready.
Finally, the eldest spoke. His voice was rough. "And if we commit to Nightclaw, Alpha Ivanshov, what's your next move?"
My answer came without thought. "We fortify the western border. We reinforce Nightclaw. And we prepare."
"For what?" another elder asked.
I lifted my gaze, meeting each of their eyes.
"There would be a war, Thornmoon must start getting ready."
The silence was heavy.
I leaned back in my chair, my mind drifting again. Back to the girl in the dungeon. To her red hair against stone. To the way she looked at me like she'd rather die than kneel.
I pushed the thought away.
War was coming. And I wouldn't be distracted by a human. No matter how strange she was.
"Send word to Nightclaw. Tell them that Thornmoon pack stands with them, we would send them some supplies and aid."
The elders didn't leave.
I felt it before anyone said anything, the way the air changed. The tension stayed thick in the room. Chairs creaked as they shifted, exchanging looks.
One of them cleared his throat.
I knew who it would be before I even looked.
Elder Hunterwood.
He was always the bold one.
"Alpha," he said carefully, folding his hands over his cane. "There's another matter we need to address."
I kept my expression blank. "Speak."
His eyes flicked to Ivan, then Mikhail, then back to me. The others followed his lead. A silent agreement passing between them.
"We're concerned," Hunterwood said. "You've shown no interest in choosing a she wolf. No interest in a Luna."
"The pack needs stability," another elder added. "Especially now. With war coming."
Hunterwood nodded. "An Alpha without a Luna leaves questions."
I leaned back in my chair, crossing my arms. The wood creaked.
"We're worried about succession," Hunterwood said. "You're thirty one. The time to sire an heir is approaching. If the worst happens on the battlefield..."
He let it trail off.
I already knew how it ended.
"And with respect," Hunterwood continued, his voice firmer now, "my daughter has been raised for this role. She's been trained. Educated. Loyal to the pack her entire life. Esme would make a strong Luna."
There it was.
I felt no surprise. Just a dull, familiar annoyance.
Several elders nodded. Others watched me carefully, waiting to see how I'd react. They expected anger. Resistance. Debate.
Instead, I relaxed further into my chair.
"I've already made my decision," I said.
The room went still.
Hunterwood blinked. "You've chosen a Luna?"
"No."
Confusion spread through the council.
I stood.
My boots echoed against stone as I walked toward the tall windows overlooking the pack lands. From here, my territory stretched endlessly. Thornmoon pack was the biggest in the wolves' lands. Dense forests that had farms and hunting stations. Training grounds for our soldiers and scouts. Housing for over five hundred thousand wolves. My responsibility. My burden.
"I've chosen a breeder," I said.
Silence filled the meeting room, hanging tension and shock in the air like heavy clouds.
I heard a sharp inhale. A chair scraping back. Someone muttered.
I turned slowly to face them.
"A breeder?" one elder said, disbelief all over his face. "You mean a human?"
"Yes."
The word sliced through the air like a blade.
Fear flickered through some faces. Others hardened with disapproval.
"A human can't bear a wolf heir," another elder snapped.
"They're weak," someone else said. "Fragile."
I met their eyes one by one, my voice dropping. "She will bear my heir."
No one spoke.
"I don't need a Luna," I continued. "I don't need affection or companionship. I need to continue my lineage. An heir to secure this pack if I fall."
Hunterwood pushed himself up from his seat, anger filled his careful tone but he kept it respectful. He knew what would happen if he spoke me rudely. "This is reckless Alpha Ivanshov. Choosing a breeder over a she wolf is an insult to our customs and traditions."
I stepped closer to the table.
"My customs and traditions," I said quietly, "are survival."
The room fell silent again.
"I won't pretend at love," I went on. "I won't bind myself to someone out of expectation. I won't lie to the pack or myself."
A pause filled the air but I continued.
"The breeder will carry my son," I said. "When that duty is done, she'll leave. That's all."
Some of the elders looked uneasy. Others looked relieved. A few looked furious as they tried to hide their faces.
I turned back toward the window.
"This discussion is over," I said. "I don't want to hear about mates or Lunas again. Focus on the war. Focus on the borders. That's your purpose."
I didn't raise my voice.
I didn't need to.
"You're dismissed."
Chairs scraped back. And one by one, they filed out. Hunterwood lingered for a moment, his gaze sharp and resentful, before finally turning away.
When the doors closed, the room felt bigger.
Quieter.
I stayed by the window, staring out at the land I ruled.
A breeder.
A human.
Red hair flashed in my mind again. The way she glared at me like she'd rather burn than bend. The way her fear didn't erase her defiance.
I clenched my jaw.
This wasn't about her.
This was about duty.
About war.
About legacy.
"Something else is bothering you." Ivan's voice broke the silence.
"Focus on the matter at hand," I said. "That's all that matters."
But even as I walked out of the chamber, I knew that was a lie.
Because somewhere in my castle, a human girl with red hair was taking up space in my thoughts that no one had been allowed to touch in years.
And I didn't know what to do with that.
**
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**18+Vena.The reason I had avoided Nikolai for the past week was because after my visit with Nira, something inside me had changed.Most of the resentment I carried toward him for forgetting Freya and me had slowly disappeared after learning the truth. It had not been his fault. His memories had been stolen from him, ripped away by a curse older and darker than I could even understand.And I hated how quickly my heart had forgiven him for it.I hated how easily I forgot the other cruel things he had done to me. The collar around my neck. The threats. The fear he constantly placed inside others. I hated how despite all of that, I still melted whenever he looked at me.Just like the naive girl I used to be back in House Rose, entranced by him.That was why I had stayed away from him all week, avoiding the piano room and slipping away whenever I heard his footsteps in the mansion halls.Because of moments like this. Moments where my body betrayed me completely.Nikolai kissed me deeply,
Vena.I pushed the glass doors open carefully and immediately stopped in my tracks.A soft gasp escaped my lips.“Wow…”The indoor pool looked nothing like I had imagined.The room was enormous, the walls lined with black marble that reflected softly against the warm golden lights built into the floor. Steam rose gently from the water, filling the air with warmth while the overhead glass ceiling revealed the dark night sky above us. Through the glass, I could see the thin crescent moon hanging quietly in the distance, its pale light mixing beautifully with the glow inside the room.The water itself shimmered softly beneath the lights, a silvery blue color, and for a second I forgot I was even inside a mansion.It looked so luxurious enough that I couldn't have even imagined it in House Rose..My eyes wandered slowly around the room in awe before finally landing on the pool itself.And then I saw him.Nikolai.He was already looking at me silently from inside the water.My breath caugh
Vena.I stared down at the notebook in front of me with a smile slowly spreading across my face, my fingers still wrapped awkwardly around the pencil as I looked at the letters written across the page that spelt my full name.Vena Ravensong.The words looked uneven and shaky, the letters slightly crossing over the blue lines beneath them, but it still made something warm bloom inside my chest.“Is this really how to spell my name?” I asked softly, almost disbelieving.Sasha smiled proudly from beside me and nodded immediately.“Of course it is.”Elena leaned over the table dramatically to inspect the page before wrinkling her nose slightly.“Though I must say,” she started thoughtfully, “your handwriting is a over the line and really bad.”Sasha immediately smacked her arm.“Don’t listen to her,” she told me quickly. “You’re still learning. There’s been so much progress since last week.”I laughed softly under my breath before looking back down at my name again.The fact that I could e
Vena.I tightened my grip slightly on the small paper bag in my hands as I approached the building, trying my best to look casual even though my heart was beating painfully hard inside my chest.The prison tower stood separated from the rest of the mansion grounds, surrounded by black gates and enough guards to make it clear nobody entered here freely. And for a second, I shivered at the memory of the first time I was here. Just as I reached the entrance, one of the guards stepped in front of me immediately.“No one is allowed to see the witch.”I nearly jumped at his voice before quickly forcing an awkward smile onto my face. Raising the paper bag slightly, I scratched the back of my neck nervously.“I’m just here to give her these,” I said softly. “Menstrual pads.”The guard blinked and I continued quickly before he could stop me again.“Unless you want her bleeding all over your fancy prison cells.”The man’s face immediately twisted in visible disgust then he muttered something un
Nikolai.I watched quietly as Vena finally stepped fully into the piano room. She looked at me for only a second before quickly glancing away again, nervousness settling visibly into her body as her fingers tugged lightly at the edge of her oversized sleeve.It made something darkly amused stir inside me and I took another slow sip of whiskey before speaking.“I thought I told you to stay away from this room.”Vena looked back at me immediately, a small scowl appearing on her face.“You didn’t,” she argued softly. “You said this room was an exception.”A smile twisted faintly at my lips.There it was again.That sharp little mouth of hers.Even when her heart was thundering loudly enough for me to hear from across the room, even when fear still lingered in the way she held herself around me, she always said exactly what was on her mind. Most people in my presence stumbled over their words or carefully measured every sentence before speaking to me, terrified of saying the wrong thing.V
Nikolai.The piano room was dark except for the faint light slipping in from outside. It barely reached the piano, only casting a dull glow across the polished white surface while the rest of the room remained buried in shadows. I sat on the couch with a glass of whiskey in my hand, staring at the instrument silently..Moonless nights always weaken wolves.We drew strength from the moon, from its presence, from its pull, and on nights like this my wolf felt quieter inside me, too weak to properly guard my thoughts. Memories always found a way in during nights like this. The kind I spent years trying to bury.I took another sip of whiskey and leaned back against the couch slowly, but it was already too late.I was sinking again.Back into the past.I could still remember that night clearly.I had been six years old when I heard my mother screaming again.It happened so often back then that my body already knew what to do before my mind could even process it. I had climbed out of bed qui
Vena.I didn't realize so much time had passed in the garden glasshouse. I had found some tools by accident.At the very back of the glasshouse, behind a row of tangled vines and a leaning wooden shelf, there was a small storage cabinet half hidden by overgrowth. It looked like it hadn’t been opened
Vena.The next time I opened my eyes, I thought I had died.I was back in my room in House Rose, the air was thick a metallic scent.For a moment, I couldn’t breathe.Then the pain hit.It was everywhere. Between my legs. Along my neck. My wrists. My thighs. My body felt split open, hollowed out and
Vena.I knew it was back to the past the moment I felt conscious again, because this was my first cage.Eight years had passed since then. And I was back to the night I had been sold.I sat very still on the edge of the bed, my hands folded in my lap like Madam Elara had drilled into us. My fingers
VenaI woke up with a dry throat and my head felt like there was someone playing drums in there. It took a few seconds for me to remember where I was. The ceilings weren't familiar and I didn't remember my bed to be this comfortable.I blinked again, slowly sitting up as memories of earlier today re







