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24. The Purse
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Forever Jude 25. She's Not Worth It
Hunger is a powerful motivator. My pity party has been going on for barely an hour when I can’t take it anymore. I haven’t eaten anything proper since morning, okay? I only had a few snacks while we watched the games and that was it. And when Jude mentioned barbecue earlier? My mouth watered and my stomach started warming up for all the good food I was anticipating. I never followed through with that and now my stomach is growling in protest. It also doesn’t help that the aroma of what Jude ordered is making its way into the bedroom. I should have taken my share before announcing my need for isolation.I walk out of the room and turn straight to the kitchen. Jude is in the living room with his back to me. Football is playing on the TV. If I’m quick enough he won’t even know I was here.I open the refrigerator and find the food containers sitting right there. I reach for the first one but another hand beats me to it.Startled, I look behind me. He’s right there, reaching for the cont
Forever Jude 26. An Unexpected Goodbye
I walk into Simon’s apartment on Saturday afternoon to find him wrestling a jacket into a suitcase.“You are just in time,” he says, looking up at me. He’s kneeling on the carpet in front of the fully packed suitcase. “Come on, give me a hand.”“What are you doing?” I ask as I shove my shoes off and slip my feet into a pair of slippers. “Why are you here?” He’s supposed to be at Ben’s lake house, sweeping Keri off her feet.I get down on the carpet and hold down one side of the suitcase. With my help, he manages to zip it up. It’s a huge suitcase, and it’s full of clothes. “Are you going somewhere?”He nods and sits on the floor, raking his fingers through his hair. “Yeah,” he says. He sounds tired, and when I look around, I get an idea why. The room is in disarray and there is another suitcase on the bed. He has been packing. A lot.My eyes move back to him. “Are you moving?”He nods and reaches for a water bottle beside him. While he takes a drink, I ask, “Where? I thought you like
Forever Jude 27. Hello Princess
On a Saturday morning two weeks after Simon leaves me fighting tears–unsuccessfully–outside the departure area, I’m sitting at the kitchen island, on a video call with Nicki.“What’s that on your neck?” she asks, making a gesture towards her own neck.I reach for my neck and raise my brow. “Like what?”“Like a hickey.” Nicki’s eyebrows pull together as she moves closer. “Wait…actually that looks more like a bite mark.” She sits back and wiggles her brow at me. “I suppose you are not taking it slow this time, uh?”I shake my head and wiggle a finger in the air. “Let’s not get sidetracked.”“Seriously, we need to get together ASAP! It’s been so long since we gossiped,” she whines.“We don’t gossip,” I say, popping a piece of apple into my mouth. She’s right, we need to get together. I didn’t get to hang out with her over the holidays because she went on a cruise with her boyfriend. And now, she’s busy with art school some six hours away.Nicki cocks her head, and her face is one big ‘s
Forever Jude 28. You Left Me
“Cole’s back.”Those are the first words I say when I wake up the next morning. “Yeah, I figured that out from all the photos you sent me yesterday of you guys eating burgers, feeding ducks at the park, and riding roller coasters,” Jude says from right beside me, his voice groggy with sleep. “Did you enjoy the date?”Jude’s right, we did all that. We spent the entire afternoon yesterday as if we were making up for lost time–which we were. After stuffing ourselves with burgers, we went to the park where we sat and talked for hours and fed the said ducks. Then we went to an amusement park and went on several rides.Nobody would probably guess that’s how Cole chose to spend his first day out of prison. He’s more likely to go to a club, get piss drunk, and pick up girls. I’m pretty sure he’s working up to that.But yesterday, he was the Cole I got to know when I was eighteen after Jude left. He was the guy who did all sorts of things he normally wouldn’t just to bring a smile to my face
Forever Jude 29. Thank You
My phone rings a few minutes later and I grab it quickly. It’s a strange number calling. I don’t waste time wondering who it could be before receiving it. “Hello?” “Hey, you need to come get your friend,” the person on the other side, a man, says.I get off the couch, frowning at the same time my pulse doubles. Is it Cole? Is it Jude? “My friend?”His voice becomes detached as he asks, “Hey, what’s your name?” A few seconds later, he says, “Name’s Cole. He’s outside Club Twenty on 7th Street.”He hangs up before I can ask any more questions. Not that there’s any need for that. Cole is outside Club Twenty on 7th Street, and I have to go get him.I hail a taxi and then rush into the bedroom to get dressed. I try to call Jude again, but his phone is still off. If he’s not with Cole, where is he?I head downstairs and wait in the lobby until my taxi arrives. The ride to the club takes twenty minutes, which seem like hours. Fortunately, the roads are clear at this hour, so there’s no del
Forever Jude 30. Welcome to the Dark Side
Cole’s still asleep when I leave for work at around ten. I leave a note on the bedside cabin letting him know I’ll be back before one. I’m crossing my fingers that he won’t be gone when I get back. Given his state last night, he might end up sleeping through the entire morning. After my session with Brent, I head straight back home. The house is quiet when I get inside, but I notice Cole’s shoes in the entryway. However, I don’t breathe easy until I peep into the guest room and find him in bed. He’s awake, and his eyes shift to me as I step inside. “Hey,” I greet with a smile. He opens his mouth, but nothing comes out. He clears his throat and tries again. “Hey.” It comes out rough. I can’t help laughing. “You sound like a dying rat.” “...right.” He is saying ‘you are right’, but only the last word comes out loud enough. He rubs his eyes and yawns, then throws his head back into the pillow and groans. “I’m guessing you are not feeling so hot,” I say. The water and the pills I l
Forever Jude 31. She is Fucking Crazy
Cole’s ‘just something small’ that won’t take long turns into a sleeve tattoo. He’s only getting a section done today, and so far it has taken two hours. That’s not counting the time it took to come up with the design together with the artist. Jude calls a little past eight. He’s gotten back home and is wondering where the hell we are. “Did he sell you to one of his shady contacts?” he asks when I pick up.“We are doing something,” is all I say, not wanting to ruin the surprise. “We’ll get back a bit later.”“What are you doing?”“You’ll see.”I decided to get a tattoo of our initials like Jude’s, and the artist worked on mine first because it was a quick job. “Have you guys had dinner yet?” he asks.“No.”“Is Chinese okay?”“Yeah.”“Alright,” he says. After a short pause, he asks, “You guys are not doing anything illegal, are you?”I chuckle. “Have a little faith in the man, will you?”“What’s he saying?” Cole asks.Jude hears that. “Tell him to mind his own business.”“I miss you
Forever Jude 32. A Midnight Proposal
Jude finds us in the hospital. Or me, rather. I'm in the ER waiting room while Cole's inside having his numerous injuries tended to.He rushes over when he spots me. I get up too fast and a sharp pain travels through my abdomen. If he didn't wrap his arms around me at that moment, I would have fallen back into my seat."You are okay. You are okay." He says the words like a chant to reassure himself that I'm indeed okay. But I don't think I am. I mean, I thought I was until I got up a second ago. It must have been the adrenaline masking the pain, because now, I feel like something in my abdomen is broken. Or squashed. Jude pulls back, and without his arms holding me up, I crumple back into the chair like rubber.Panic crisscrosses his face and he reaches for me. "What's wrong?"I place a hand over my stomach and wince. "I don't know."I do, though. He reaches for my blouse and pulls it up a bit. He doesn't like what he sees. He whirls, looking around. "Hey, someone's hurt," he yells
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