Chapter 4

Everyone else turned to me too, waiting for a show.

I'd never been the favorite, so my parents never stood up for me in public, not even when someone picked on me.

That's how my brother and sister learned they could humiliate me.

But I didn't react the way they wanted. I didn't snap back, turn red, or burst into tears.

I just glanced at them calmly, then turned and left.

That night, after everyone left, I cleaned up the mess downstairs by myself.

My mother was on the phone, bragging. "Tomorrow we're taking Freya on a trip to meet a master healer.

"She's famous. If she sees Freya's talent and takes her on as an apprentice, wouldn't that be wonderful?

"For Freya, I'd pay any price!"

As I listened to her dote on Freya, I thought of the admission I'd lost because I couldn't pay $150. The pain cut deep.

After she hung up, Freya trailed after her, looking as though she wanted to say something but didn't dare.

My mother stroked her hair. "What is it? It's okay, Freya. Just tell me."

"I'm nervous about tomorrow's trial. Could Elena help me out?"

My mother didn't seem to get what Freya meant yet, but I understood right away.

"You want me to get hurt so you can practice on me?" I shouted, my voice shaking.

My sister flinched as if I'd frightened her and ducked behind our mother.

Her voice was tiny as she mumbled, "I'll be careful, Elena. It won't be that bad..."

My mother sighed. "Just help her this once, Elena. You're the older sister. Your sister's going to see that master healer tomorrow. It's a rare opportunity. Help her out."

I'd heard that line my whole life. It always meant I had to give in. This time, I didn't want to.

I shook my head. "I can't."

I couldn't hurt my own body like that just so my sister could practice.

When my mother saw I wouldn't budge, she looked at Freya's pleading face and softened her voice.

"All right, Elena, stop being difficult," she said. "If you help your sister this time, I'll get you a new tarot deck."

I paused. "Really?"

I'd spent my whole life asking for things and getting nothing. But my mother's promise warmed me a little.

I wanted a gift from my family too, even if it was only to make up for what they'd ruined.

My mother looked at me gently and nodded.

"Okay," I agreed right away.

That night, my sister drove a dagger into my arm, and only then did she start frantically flipping through her books.

Maybe she was nervous about meeting the master, because she was much slower than usual. By the time she finally started healing me, the pain had nearly made me pass out.

The practice session didn't end until dawn.

My sister let out a long breath, relaxed, and packed up her things.

She ran out and hugged our parents.

"How'd it go, sweetheart?" my father asked with a smile.

"No problem!" My sister lifted her chin, beaming with pride.

"I knew you'd be fine."

"That healer's going to love Freya. Everyone always has..."

"And we'll give the master some jewels to decorate her studio..."

Pale and drained, I left the room. They were already packing downstairs, ready to go.

No one cared how I was doing. No one even asked about my wound.

"What about the tarot deck you promised me?" I said.

My mother glanced at my pale face and hesitated. "There's no time to buy one now. We'll talk about it later.

"If you ask me, you shouldn't be studying that stuff anyway," she added, as if something had just occurred to her.

With that, she turned her back on me.

She never even saw how disappointed I was. She was too busy holding Freya's hand and soothing her. I didn't argue. I just stood there and said it again. "You promised me."

My mother's face turned sour.

"Are you still complaining about that? Enough already." My father frowned at me, irritated.

"I don't want to hear this first thing in the morning. Mom, Dad, Freya, let's go!" my brother urged them.

My mother seemed to hesitate. She glanced back at me, but in the end, she left with them.

Not once did any of them think to ask whether I wanted to come along.

It had always been this way. No matter what happened, I was the one left behind. I'd grown used to it.

Maybe this was for the best.

My phone buzzed. Miles had sent me a message.

"Congratulations, Elena. You passed. You can go to the Academy of Prophecy and Divination in the south and see the Archmage directly.

"He thinks you have a lot of potential and has applied for a full scholarship for you. You won't have to worry about tuition anymore."

Then $300 landed in my bank account.

Another message from Miles came through. "This is for the trip, kid. Go chase your dream, and never look back!"

As I read his message, all the hurt I'd held in for years came pouring out.

I wiped my eyes and went to pack. On my way out, I looked one last time at the family portrait on the living room wall.

It had been taken five years ago. My sister was in a princess dress, sitting on my father's lap. My brother wore a knight's outfit, holding my mother's hand, smiling proudly.

I was taller than both of them, but I stood at the edge of the picture in an old dress a size too small. I looked stiff, unsure what to do with my hands or feet, as if I already knew I didn't belong.

My brother once told me I didn't look like part of the family.

I didn't look like my father or my mother, and my personality and habits were nothing like theirs.

If that was true, maybe I needed to go far away to find my real "home."

I looked away, checked my acceptance letter once more, and walked out of the house.

The train sent steam into the winter air as it pulled away from my snowy hometown.

My future was waiting somewhere far away.