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1. THE BEGINNING

"O my people, this worldly life is only [temporary] enjoyment, and indeed, the Hereafter - that is the home of [permanent] settlement"(QURAN 40:39)

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8 YEARS AGO

"And between them will be a barrier screen and on Al-A'raf (a wall with elevated places) will be men (whose good and evil deeds would be equal in scale), who would recognise all (of the Paradise and Hell people), by their marks (the dwellers of Paradise by their white faces and the dwellers of Hell by their black faces), they will call out to the dwellers of Paradise, "Salamun 'Alaikum" (peace be on you), and at that time they (men on Al-A'raf) will not yet have entered it (Paradise), but they will hope to enter (it) with certainty."(7:46-Al Quran)

She couldn't stop thinking about the theology lecture from last period. Something about it had got stuck with her. 

'It shouldn't be so bad though. It is still better than going to hell, right?' She made an attempt to pacify herself and get some comfort in the process.

"Hey, Samar?" She asked, without looking at her. It was the start of winter season but winters in Gulf meant 15 degrees temperature in the most extreme conditions. Yet, most of the kids in school were already in their winter uniform. 

"Hmm?" Samar returned distracted. For a while longer, Aasiya continued to stare at the kids in the playground. After being lost in her thoughts, she turned to face Samar, who was scribbling in her sketch book, which Aasiya had gifted to her along with a huge box of art supplies for her 13th birthday. Aasiya watched her face for a moment longer, which had a look of sheer concentration that she wore rarely.

"Do you love sketching that much?" She asked finally, watching her sketch the playground. 

"Yes. It's the only thing that I am passionate about." She answered without looking up; a gentle smile playing on her lips.  As Aasiya continued to watch her, a painful realisation struck her, as it did during such rare moments. 

'Samar is so different from me.' She was thinking this, when Samar looked up suddenly. This took Aasiya by surprise and she turned away abruptly.

"What are you thinking now, Aasiya?" Samar inquired without missing a beat. However, she didn't meet her eyes, pretending to not notice her gaze.

"You are amazing at everything that you do. There's nothing that you lack. From strong and rich family background to good looks and intelligence; Allah has blessed you with everything and anything a person can ask or hope for." Samar continued but Aasiya was only listening with half an ear to the things that she had heard a million times before. 

'What do you know.' She thought bitterly.

"—you'll be an amazing surgeon! I just know it!" At this Aasiya turned to her with a chuckle.

"Don't you know how hard it is to get admission in medical colleges in Pakistan these days?" She watched  Samar with wide eyes, who was staring back at her with a satisfied smile.

"Of course! But you are the best in our class. I know you'll make it." She ended in a matter of fact way.

"You are the only one who thinks that." She muttered under her breath, stealing a glance at Samar who had returned to sketching in her book once again.

PRESENT TIME

"Assalamualaikum baji." Nasira said as she opened the door for me.

"1! 2! 3! 4 turn! And 5! 6–-" My gaze wandered towards the basement from where loud music and noises could be heard. Even without going in there, I knew it was full of guests and cousins preparing for the mehndi tomorrow.

"Walaikumusalam." I returned coming in.

"Baji, do you want lunch?"

"No. I am good." I returned distracted, going up to my room but the entire drawing room and hallway was stuffed with Faiza's stuff. Her dowry, furniture, bags and boxes along with other stuff for the upcoming wedding. Tiptoeing through all the stuff I carefully made way to my bedroom. Sigh..Its finally that time huh?

I came down a while later to get some water when I saw the kitchen was in an uproar.

"That's a lot of food, Nasira. Is everyone staying for dinner?" I asked bewildered looking at all the dishes on the dining table.

"Oh no. It's because Sahab and Baji are coming back today and your Uncles and Aunties would be coming too. It's going to be a proper dawat. Baji had instructed me on the phone that everything should be ready before they reach. Imran has already left to pick them up from the Airport. They might be coming any minute now." Nasira explained to me but I had already turned a blind ear to her, as I grabbed a water bottle from the fridge and the ice cream container.

I was making way upstairs when I came face to face with Haniya, daughter of Mum's sister.

"Hey Aasiya!" She hugged me and I tried to return it while keeping hold on my ice cream.

"Where have you been?! We have been waiting for you since ages. Come on we are preparing the dances! You have to dance as well!" She announced enthusiastically, without leaving me room to interject.

"I am the last person, whom anyone would want up on stage. I can't dance." I returned calmly, rejecting flat-out.

"I am sure that's just your excuse to bail. There's no way you're missing out on your only sisters' wedding—" She was complaining when Faiza cut her off.

"Leave her be Huny. She is in the middle of her final proff exams." She remarked nonchalantly while drinking from her bottle. I looked at her blankly before turning to smile at Haniya.

"Oh yeah, you did mention it before. I think my mind isn't in it's place anymore with all that choreographing. When is your last exam?" She rambled on and on and I silently watched her with a smile plastered on my face.

"Tomorrow." Before I could say anything, Faiza spoke. My gaze lingered on her face for a moment longer, who wasn't even looking at me.

"Oh you poor soul. We'll try to keep it down. Best of luck."

"You too. Have fun."I returned and waved her bye, before turning to leave. Coming back to my room, I made myself comfortable on my bed, with the ice cream box in my lap and a movie playing on the TV. My exams had been over for a week now and I was officially done with my medical degree. Almost, until the result comes out.  I was replying to a text on my phone when suddenly the bell went off. My gaze froze at the door. A few minutes later I could make out other peoples noises. Slowly, I got up from the bed and locked my door. After getting back to bed, I switched off the TV and opened up my laptop, with headphones blaring music in my ears.

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Glancing at my reflection in the mirror one last time, I adjusted the bangs falling on my forehead.

"Nasira? Nasira I don't want breakfa--" Before I could complete my sentence I was cut short by the sight of my mother. Shoot! I didn't think she would be up this early. To think, I had gone through so much effort of avoiding them.

"Oh, so you finally decide to bless us with your presence?" She exclaimed unamused as she walked towards me; arms outstretched. I awkwardly placed my hands on her back while she engulfed me in a hug and made kissing sounds while patting my cheeks with her face.

"Hi Mom." I muttered under my breath at which she seemed positively apalled.

"Hi, Aasiya? I think its a tad bit late for that, won't you agree?" She returned sarcastically before picking up her mug of green tea and walking out of the kitchen. I stood there for a moment contemplating whether to let her be or to follow her. In the end after having told Nasira, who was standing to the side, seemingly absorbed in her work about breakfast, I followed Mom.

"To say it was embarrassing to explain your absence yesterday would be the understatement of the year. How hard was it for you to come down and greet everyone? Thank God for Faiza, who handled the situation with an excuse of your exams. Otherwise, I was exhausted trying to cover up my humiliation. Will you ever stop for a second and start thinking about others instead of yourself, for once?" I heard her lecture with a roll of eyes, following her to the drawing room.

"Anyways, I don't want any—and I mean, ANY unnecessary drama today. Am I clear, Aasiya?" She inquired, without looking up from her phone while taking a seat on the sofa. I stood there, watching her for a moment; contemplating. In the end, relented with a nod.

"Yes mother." She looked up briefly to nod her approval, before going back to her phone. Before she could pose anymore questions or lectures, I turned and left. With the exams over, we finally had time to relax, however this shadi business had taken that away from me too. So, I had decided to spend my afternoon with my friends. Even if short lived, anything is better than staying in this house right now. I thought, taking the car out of the garage.

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It was the perfect wedding.

A mixed social gathering, where the youngsters danced on professionally choreographed songs. The stage was especially prepared, alongside the elaborate and expensive decor. The best couture and jewellery, that anyone in the country could only dream of affording. Teamed up with the best photographers and impeccable management. To top it up, leading politicians, celebrities and elites of the country, made the guest list.

'The dream wedding! The best of the best! There was nothing in it's parallel! This was it. The epitome of grandeur! Crème de la crème!!'

I scoffed at the thought, whilst watching the girls walk down the stage, hand in hand with their male partners. 

'How ridiculous.' 

The thought struck me, as I chugged down the last of my soft drink and walked away from my hidden spot and out into the dark; away from sparkles of the wedding. The chill caught my skin, causing me to shiver. So, I opted to pull my net dupatta around me. Although, it hardly gave any comfort but still, it was better than nothing.

I pulled open the door to my car and stepped in my aqua pink lehnga. High-end designer ofcourse. 

'God knows, how much my Mother had spent on this dress alone.'

Taking off my heels, I turned on the music to full volume and drove into the night. I would be dead for this later, when they found out, but for the most part, I think they had given up on me.

I drove onto the deserted road for sometime until a car came into view. Barely giving it a second thought, I had let it overtake me. Except, it didn't take the lead. 

I glanced back through the rear-view mirror, but couldn't make out anyone in the darkness. Stepping on the accelerator, I sped up and turned down the volume but the car was still on my tail. There wasn't anyone on the road for a long while now and I didn't seem to have missed any turn.

I could sense myself starting to panic. My heart was thumping loudly in my chest and my hands were visibly shaking with tremors. I had tried to pick up my phone, when suddenly there was a loud horn. 

In shock, I dropped the phone, somewhere near my feet. The blaring of horn didn't stop. It was alternating between long and short pauses now and I was finding it hard to breathe. 

Unable to shake off the tremors in my hand, I picked up the speed but it didn't overthrow the car, instead, it kept on closing the distance. 

I took a moment to glance at the rear view mirror and saw the headlights flashing. Just for a moment, only a fraction of second, I lost control and the next thing I know, I am crashing.

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