Chapter 1

CAUSE OF DEATH: INTRACRANIAL HEMORRHAGE; ASPHYXIA.

The words on Lily’s death certificate blurred beneath my tears.

Outside my hospital room, people were celebrating.

Rebecca Sloan’s son had made it through treatment.

My husband stood in the middle of the crowd holding little Leo against his chest, smiling as he played with the boy’s tiny fingers.

“I knew he’d pull through,” Ethan said. “Our Leo is a fighter. He’ll get to grow up healthy like every other kid.”

The words went straight through me.

My daughter had only just turned one month old.

She should have grown up too.

Instead, she had died in the same hospital where everyone was cheering for another child.

The door opened.

Ethan came in carrying Leo. His mother, Diane, and Rebecca followed him.

The moment he saw I was awake, he smiled and walked toward my bed.

“Claire, look. Leo’s treatment worked. The doctors said his odds were terrible, but he made it.”

He looked down at the boy affectionately.

“He really is lucky.”

Then he noticed my swollen eyes.

His voice stopped.

For one brief second, guilt flickered across his face.

He remembered what he had done to get that cord blood.

Rebecca walked to my bedside and dropped to her knees.

“Claire, thank you,” she said, her eyes filling. “If it weren’t for you, Leo never would’ve made it.”

Diane pulled her straight back up.

“That’s enough. You’ve thanked her.”

Then she looked at me with open irritation.

“Her daughter is that sick anyway. The cord blood should’ve gone to Leo from the start.”

They were all still wrapped up in Leo’s recovery.

None of them knew Lily was already dead.

Ethan sighed when I didn’t respond.

“Right now you need to focus on recovering.”

His tone was patient in the way people speak to someone they think is being unreasonable.

“I didn’t have a choice. Leo is my godson. My mother practically raised Rebecca, and she loves that boy like a grandson.

“You can hate me for it if you want, but don’t take it out on Rebecca. I’ll figure something else out for Lily.”

He admitted everything.

And there was almost no regret in his face.

For Rebecca’s son, he had abandoned his own daughter.

Something in me collapsed.

I looked at him through red, swollen eyes.

“Lily was one month old.”

My voice shook.

“Did you think about her at all? She was your daughter, Ethan.

“Every one of you is that selfish. Did any of you stop for one second and ask what happens to my baby?”