Chapter 3

A bitter laugh escaped me, my eyes burning.

I couldn’t get the sight of Lily out of my head.

She was so small. They had hollowed her out and made a specimen of her, and now she would float in that tank of formalin forever.

And even so, Ethan stood there playing dumb.

Rebecca pulled Leo protectively behind her and watched me nervously.

“Claire, if you’re angry, take it out on me. Don’t blame Ethan. Everything he did, he did for me.

“Please don’t let me be the reason your marriage falls apart...”

She sounded apologetic.

But I caught the satisfaction underneath it.

That was the moment I understood something simple.

Rebecca could only do this because Ethan let her.

Lily would still be alive, and still whole, if he had not chosen Rebecca’s child over his own.

My arms fell to my sides.

Ethan’s expression softened when he saw how badly I was bleeding.

“You don’t have to worry. I keep my promises. There’s no reason to stand here making a scene.

“I already said I’d get Lily the best treatment there is. Leukemia like hers gives her three years at the most. You’d be kinder to let her go early—

“We’re still young. We can have another healthy baby.”

He had said that last part to me more times than I could count since the day our daughter was born.

“Ethan, you don’t deserve to call yourself a father.”

Better to take her out of this place than leave her here for the rest of time.

And never come back.

I stayed in the hospital for a full month before they let me go.

Ethan tried several times to smooth things over.

I ignored him.

Eventually, his patience disappeared.

He threw himself into Leo’s recovery and seemed to forget he had a daughter at all.

It wasn’t until after I was discharged that he came to me.

“Leo’s recovering really well.”

He sat beside me and squeezed my hand.

“Mom wants us at the house tonight. She wants to make it a celebration.”

I said nothing.

He mistook my silence for anger about the cord blood.

“I know you’re still upset. I’ve already been in touch with specialists overseas. Give it a little longer and we’ll send Lily out for treatment—”

I interrupted him.

“When was the last time you saw Lily?”

He froze.

Maybe he realized for the first time how long it had been since he’d asked about his own daughter.

I no longer cared enough to explain.

Before he could say anything else, I stood and put distance between us.

“You said dinner. Let’s go.”

He didn’t argue. He stayed close behind me the whole way, his eyes drifting to me again and again.

Rebecca was already at his mother’s house when we arrived.

She gave me a polite smile.

The baby in her arms had filled out. Pink cheeks. Bright eyes.

For one unbearable second, I thought that if Lily had lived, I would have raised her better than that.

Rebecca noticed me looking and pulled her son closer.

“Claire, you don’t mind that I’m here, do you? Diane asked me to come tonight—”

“I don’t mind.”

I said it lightly and walked past her.

Dinner was exactly as miserable as I expected.

Ethan sat pressed close to Rebecca and watched Leo with a tenderness he had never once shown our daughter.

Diane could barely put the boy down.

I sat at the edge of the table and said nothing.

Eventually, her attention landed on me.

She made a small contemptuous noise.

“Claire, you and that sickly daughter of yours have held Ethan back long enough.

“So I want the two of you divorced, and I want Ethan to marry Rebecca. Leo’s father is dead. The boy needs a new one.

“Don’t worry. Name whatever figure you want.”

Ethan’s fork slipped out of his hand and clattered onto his plate.