It has been a week, and everything has been quiet. I want to see Jessie, make sure she is okay and thank her. Every time I consider it, I hear she is still at Diesel’s place. I don’t want to go there, I don’t want to see him. I have to though. I have battled all week over whether or not I should open the folder with his name. It could give me every bit of information I need on Diesel. It could tell me why he is the way he is. It could also hold information that I never want to know. Just like my folder. I’m glad I know the truth now, but that doesn’t help. It doesn’t mean I don’t think back over and over about how things ended up. My dad knew, and I don’t know if he agreed with what Jake did to me. Hell for all I know it could have been his idea. He told me Jake disappeared, but it was clear my dad had paid him too. The payment that no doubt he hoped would keep his involvement a secret. “You know, it doesn’t matter how long you stare at the screen, at the folder. Nothing will chan
I woke and considered last night. The fact I would have fucked Jessie is wrong. I smile at her from across the table. “Don’t worry Diesel, I know it was a mistake.” She smiles at me. “Fuck, Jessie! I don’t deserve you to be nice to me or understanding. I’m a fucking prick.” How can she smile and forgive me so quickly? “You’re not a prick Diesel. Last night you were hurting over everything. In those moments you let go of the ‘what ifs’ you don’t hide from your feelings or love. Don’t worry about it.” I simply nod to her. “Wait.” My word confused, as I watch her look towards me. She laughs slightly nodding. “Yes, Diesel. Don’t worry though, I know your past, and I know that is why you hide from love. I don’t blame you. Letting someone in and admitting it leads to pain. While I was gone I realised.” “Realised what Jessie?” “That me pushing you was wrong. You won’t ever let me or anyone else in Diesel. Anyone who you even remotely care for, any woman that is. Fear of what comes n
I get ready and look towards Dwayne.Something is going on with you, what?” I look at him waiting. “Still convinced you lost Jessie?” He needs to go claim her.“No, she slept with him the day after she was found.”“Oh,” what else can I say?“He agreed to give her a try, now Diesel will want me dead.”I laugh at his words.“Why now? Dwayne what have you done?”“Last night I saw Jessie, she ended up back at my place, in my bed.”I stare at him.“Fucking hell Dwayne! You knew and still slept with her? I can’t exactly tell him not to beat you. I am going to go there anyway, see Jessie, and apologise to him. I will let you know how much of a mess it is.” Grabbing my bag and the gift bag I leave, climbing into the car I sit.“Where to Miss?” Shaun looks at me waiting.“Diesel’s home addres
I listen to her words and struggle with what to reply. Her dad knew, her dad planned it. Me fine, I am no one to him, but his own daughter? “Is it fucked up that somewhere inside, that made me feel better? For years I told myself if I had done something different, or had begged him to leave Elsie out of it, they would be alive today. Knowing even his own family were treated the same makes me realise nothing I said would change it.” I wish it could have, but it won’t. “Ask me in a few months, Diesel, as right now I am still getting used to the idea my dad knew and paid Jake. I knew he struggled to accept I could run the city, but I didn’t think it would be that bad.” I look at her. “Do you think Jake was the plan? Maybe your dad wanted him to marry you so he took over the city?” Why else would her dad pay him to be in her life? “I know he did. I saw the contracts. My dad promised him the city once he died if we were married. He paid him
I smile at him. His face shows he is shocked by my words. They were a joke, but now, I am actually considering it.Do I really want to walk out of here, and regret it? If I walk out of here will things go back to how they were?If I don’t make a move, will Jessie come back, and his head be turned? Moving forward, my lips press against his. A small moan escapes my mouth as I feel him pull back.“Not the best time Serena.” He looks at me worried.“No time is Diesel, I refused you, and you refused me. So just shut the hell up and kiss me.” I pull him to me, our lips connecting again, this time though he doesn’t pull away. His arm wraps around my body pulling me closer.My hands move, slowly sliding up to pull his top off, his hands pull me closer as his body falls back. Staying above him, I straddle him, my hands fighting with his trousers as his hand pulls the shirt, the buttons falling from it.My hips grin
Silence surrounds us as we lay in each other’s arms. My mind screaming at me for so many reasons.I should have said no, I care for Serena and Jessie, and now I have made a mess and I know I have.I should have waited until I wasn’t so consumed with hate and hurt.Shaking my head I move, lifting Serena from the floor and walking to my bedroom. Placing her in bed, I turn and find one of my shirts, placing it on the side next to her.I ripped her clothes, so the shirt is there ready for when she decides to run.Walking through to the kitchen I grab a drink, knowing I should be exhausted, I would be, but my mind won’t let me give in to exhaustion. Not until it has punished me.I turn and see the door open, my eyes rolling. Did no one think to shut the door today? Walking to close it I stop and see Dwayne standing next to the car.“Don’t hit me! I wouldn’t be here, but the guy called to say he had to leave, she wasn’t meant to be here more than an hour let alone six, so I replaced him.”I
I wake with my body entangled around Diesels. It hurts, parts of my body are sore, and other parts physically hurt, I can’t help but smile.Moving slowly out of the bed I put on the shirt and walk out of the bedroom. Grabbing a drink, I walk to the room we were in yesterday. Deciding to clean it. It was me who kissed him, I hadn’t even thought of where we were.I spend a while picking up items, glueing a small ornament that had smashed before moving onto the carpet. I should really message my driver and Dwayne, but that drags me back to the real world.Something I want to avoid for as long as possible.“Diesel?”My head shoots up hearing Jessie, I watch as she appears at the door. Great, the real world. I watch as her eyes fall on my body, a flicker of pain etched onto her face. Moving, I try to cover more of my body with the shirt.“You shouldn’t be in here.” She stands looking at me annoyed.“I’m cleaning, Diesel won’t mind. How are you, Jessie?” I smile at her, I can’t see any mar
“So tonight, a date? A real one, not one where I have my cock in some woman's mouth under the table, or I purely trying to seduce and taunt you.”She laughs at my words.“Sounds like a plan Diesel. Message me when you know you’re free.”“So, how long do you think they will be?” I step closer, watching as her body shakes.“Erm, I don’t know.”I watch as her teeth graze against her lip, her breathing quickening.“Mmmm.” I step forward again watching as she moves, her back against the wall. I wrap my arms around her. My lips reach hers as we kiss. I feel her move, her hands pushing me back so I fall onto the sofa.“Strip.”I laugh at her word.“I wasn’t joking, strip.” Her words are firm, and I watch as she unbuttons my shirt that she has been using to hide her own body. Moving I strip slowly, and walk to her.As I reach for her, she smiles and pushes me back. Giving in, I let my body fall onto the sofa. I will let her take control, for the start anyway.I watch as she moves to straddle