Chapter 2

Dad went to Mom's grave.

I floated along behind him.

It was cold, and the trees in the cemetery were bare.

Dad had bought a bouquet of white lilies, and he laid it in front of her headstone.

He crouched down and traced Mom's name on the stone with his fingertips.

I could still picture her face, as gentle as it was every time she did my hair.

Dad's voice was hoarse.

"Julia, I came to see you.

"I couldn't protect you. And I couldn't protect the baby."

A tiny bit of hope rose in me. Was Dad talking about me?

He was silent for a long time. Then his jaw clenched.

"Every time I look at her, I remember how I lost you.

"And she still has the nerve to cry! What right does she have to cry?"

Oh. He wasn't talking about me...

I didn't have a body anymore, but somehow my chest still ached.

Dad, I'm sorry. I can't cry now either.

He went on.

"She's nothing like you.

"You were so softhearted, and she's so selfish.

"She wanted a sister, and you paid for it with your life.

"Now you're both gone, and she's the only one left, sitting at home playing the victim."

Tears rolled down Dad's face as he spoke.

I reached up to wipe them away.

My hand went right through his face.

Dad, I'm not playing the victim.

I really did die at home.

Just then, his phone rang.

The screen said "Ms. Ramirez."

She was my teacher.

When Dad answered, his voice was still thick with tears, but it quickly turned cold and hard.

"What is it?"

Ms. Ramirez sounded anxious.

"Mr. Dawson, Sadie hasn't been at school in several days. Do you know where she is?"

Dad frowned.

"She hasn't been going?"

Ms. Ramirez paused.

"You didn't know?"

Dad let out a cold laugh.

"I knew she was up to her tricks again.

"The minute her mother's gone, she thinks she can get away with anything."

Ms. Ramirez's voice turned serious.

"Mr. Dawson, Sadie's only seven. She's missed this much school, and as her guardian, you should've checked on her right away."

Dad sounded impatient.

"She's at home.

"She's probably just hiding because she doesn't want to go to school."

Ms. Ramirez pressed him.

"Then could you please put her on the phone? I need to make sure she's safe."

Dad's expression darkened.

"She won't come to the phone.

"She's got a real attitude these days."

I stood in front of Dad, shaking my head as hard as I could.

It wasn't that I wouldn't.

My phone was dead.

And I couldn't talk anymore.

Ms. Ramirez kept trying.

"Mr. Dawson, Sadie just lost her mother. This is bound to affect her. The school can connect her with a counselor. Please don't put all of this on her shoulders."

That hit a nerve. Dad shot to his feet.

"What do you mean, put it on her?

"If she hadn't kept begging for a sister, would her mother ever have gotten pregnant again?

"And now look. Everyone feels sorry for her.

"My wife is dead. My unborn daughter is dead. And somehow Sadie's the victim?"

His shouting left Ms. Ramirez speechless for a moment.

A few seconds later, struggling to keep her temper, she said, "Mr. Dawson, pregnancy and childbirth are decisions adults make. A seven-year-old can't be responsible for that."

Dad laughed.

It was a cold, vicious laugh.

"Of course you'd say that.

"It's not your family that died.

"She's a good little actress. She probably skipped school on purpose just so you'd call and chew me out."

Ms. Ramirez was clearly getting desperate.

"Please go home and check on her right now."

Dad hung up on her.

He stared at his phone for a moment, then called me.

All he got was a recording saying the phone was turned off.

Dad's eyes grew colder and colder.

"Well, look at you.

"Turning your phone off now, too."

I crouched beside him and whispered.

Dad, I didn't turn it off.

The battery died.

And my hands can't hold it anymore.

But he couldn't hear me.

Then Grandma called.

"The school called me, too. Where on earth is Sadie?"

Dad answered right away.

"Oh, she went out a little while ago. She's probably hiding at a friend's house."

Grandma's voice rose.

"Probably? Do you even know where she is? Go find her!"

Dad pinched the bridge of his nose in irritation.

"Margaret, don't let her fool you.

"These days she just loves having everyone run around after her."

Grandma's voice trembled.

"Thomas, how can you talk about your own daughter like that?"

Dad was quiet for a moment, then said in a low voice, "If she's my daughter, she should know how to behave.

"She already got Julia killed."

On the other end of the line, Grandma started to cry.

"It was an accident!

"The doctors told you it was an accident!"

Dad hung up on her.

He stood in front of Mom's grave, his chest heaving.

"Everyone's on her side.

"Julia, if you were here, you'd stick up for her too, wouldn't you?"

He gave a cold laugh.

"Fine. Let her keep it up.

"Let's see how long she can keep this act going."

Dad turned and walked away.

Not once did he go home to check on me.