This cycle of overthinking between past and future sn
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Kaushalya's POV When I thought my life was perfect, God decided to remind me that nothing and nobody is more perfect than the world. Yeah, at some point I came to know that the world is so perfect. It is our expectations, needs, wants, greed, and intentions that make it all sad and insufficient to live here. It was more like I realized that till now I was living in a bubble and now someone has just popped that bubble out. Whatever happened today wasn't that easy to move on and concentrate on something else. I have seen a different version of Sanjiv. The way he spoke to me, the way he treated me today, and not to mention how roughly he smacked my lips, showing all his anger on it. all these things aren't easy to get out of my mind. He never acted like this before. Perhaps little did I know from the start he's kinda rude at times when he's upset with something
Author's pov Her throbbing heart wasn't ready to ease even for a moment. She didn't get time to catch her uneven breath. She was drained out of energy, mentally and physically both! the most mental traumas were eating her up that she lost her peace. The puzzlement between good and bad was chasing her all the time. That one slap made her question their whole relationship. She was hurt. No more than hurt. Hurt would be a lessen word to express how worst she was feeling. How bad her mental health was. She was feeling naked in front of him. Yes, naked. He turned the piece of self-respect that she used to wear and now when he made her feel like the rust of his foot she was regretting her existence. Life changes in moments, so do the people. Not even in imagination, she expected that one day her husband
Authors POV. Koushalya held her breath when she felt his presence close to her. Yes, the same man who once used to give her butterfly effects whenever he's around her, now scares her the most. She somehow realized that he can go to any extent when he's angry. Last night She saw the devil in his eyes. She is now messed up, one side his inhuman activities over her and the other side her insane love that she has for him. It's the world's 8th wonder that she still couldn't get over loving him, even after what he did. She is perplexed on how to stop loving him? isn't too cringe and stupid? Maybe yes or maybe not. How to stop loving a person? Of course, one cant step back after falling in love with someone. Because once you fall for someone, that person holds a special place in your heart that no one can ever replace no matter how good the other person is. Love is like a poison that you drink willingl
Author's POV. Life can never be the way you expect. It has its twists and turns which shakes your world upside down in a second that you can't even imagine. Those twists and turns take you to the edge of a mountain of purlex about what to do next and how to reciprocate with the sudden turn of life. Just how koushalya is lost in emotions when she came to know that a little life is growing inside her already when she is unsure about her current life. Fear of responsibility and frustration took over her. She isn't sure if she should feel happy for being pregnant or she should feel sad knowing that this isn't the best time to invite a new member in her life. Surely she would have been happy if the situation was different, only if the situation was different. Her hands reached to her stomach without her consent, cherishing her stomach over her clothes she lo
Koushalya's POV Every so often, I feel like leaving everything and running away somewhere, where no one can find me. I want to disappear so that I don't need to face anyone. I'm tired. There's no energy left in me to handle all these now. I need to restart my life, restart myself and rearrange the things in my life. Or if it's possible I would rather go to the past by using a time machine and stop my past self from taking those foolish decisions, due to which right now I'm suffering. My perception of myself has been destroyed so much, I barely recognize who I am. This is my fucking life, but heck with it. I never felt like one. Because everyone around me controls my life except me. I don't have any rights in my life. There's no room for myself, my emotions, and my thoughts. There's not a single person who loves me for who I am. I'm desperate for someone
Koushalyas POV Throwing the pregnancy reports on him, I aggressively searched for the bottle which he bought for me in the name of contraceptive pills. Sanjiv was still stick on the same place as a statue. He didn't budge from that place even after I threw the reports on him. My hands were hurriedly roaming inside the bag, while my eyes kept jumping on him being curious about his reactions. When I finally got a hold of it, I pulled it out and threw the bottle on the floor with so much agony that it bumped on the floor shattering into pieces. " How cheap can you get Sanjiv? How cruel and selfish can you be? '' Making sure my voice reaches his ears, I put the question in front of him. Today I came to know about his criminal mind too.
Sanjiv's POV The moment I heard her confessing about her being pregnant, I felt as if someone threw a bucket full of ice water on my face. I was so happy to react, to speak. Finally, it happened after so many layers of fooling her with pills. It took a few minutes for me to come out from the shock she gave me. After realizing what she just said I got so excited at that moment and I ignored what she was even yelling about. I wanted to hug her, this feeling is something so soothing to my heart. Stepping forwards I held her shoulders and tried to calm her down. But she pushed me away and began to put out of sight that she held from long inside her. She said almost everything that I did till now and continued to even say more. Listening to all her accusations I was disappointed with something that's inside me- my dark soul. Initially, I didn't want to do that, but she gave me no options. I desperately wanted to have a child with her, but
Sanjiv's POV gazing at the gloomy sky I rested my head against the wall, sting on the comfy chair of the drawing room I analyzed the calmness around me. it's been a few minutes since koushy fall asleep due to dizziness. I thought to let her rest for a while as the past few days have been hard for her to sleep. I took a day off because today morning when I woke up I couldn't find koushy anywhere near. Looking for her I roamed around the house just then my eyes fell on the sticky note she left for me. immediately I took my phone and called her, but not even once did she answer my calls, now this made me restless. I decided to stay at home till she returned as I didn't have any clue where she went. But, I didn't expect her to come back with happy tidings. fixing my eyes outside of the window I processed things that happened today. The space between me and the window was quite close, so I was getting a clear view of the emptin