LOGINXXXIV: I Didn't Know ~XENOS~ The words landed differently. I felt the anger in my chest shift. “You're not being honest with me, Odessa." That was the part I'd never recover from. She was a liar. She lied so much that I stopped knowing the difference between her truths and lies. “I am, Xenos." She nodded. “I know about your curse. Trust me, I heard about it and do you think your child being mute is ordinary?" My chest tightened. My heartbeat slowed as I stared at her with a bitter ache in my chest. “What are you talking about?’ "You don't know anything, Xenos.” She shook her head sadly, a sad smile pulling at her lips. "I left for many reasons you would never have understood.” She walked down to me in the corridor, leaving Odessa's door behind her. " I am Odessa. Odessa Tywin, the bad girl. Am I not?” My lips couldn't even part. I stood there, staring at her with no words coming to me. "I left because I was scared, Xenos. I am not a hero.” I blinked. Really hard.
XXXIII: Her Defense~XENOS~“Is he really your son?” Lowell’s question stayed with me even after the mindlink went quiet.I stood outside Roenna’s door, staring at the wood in front of me, but for the first time since I had arrived there, I wasn't thinking about what was happening on the other side. I wasn't thinking about whether Roenna was still crying, whether she had fallen asleep from exhaustion, or whether she would eventually open the door and let me explain everything I had failed to explain properly. Lowell's question had forced another thought into my head—one I had been trying not to examine since Odessa appeared in that hall.Was Xenon really my son?I had looked into the boy's eyes and felt something I couldn't explain. Not recognition exactly. I had never seen him before, but there had been something about him that had unsettled me from the moment I saw him. His face carried pieces of mine I could not deny, from the shape of his eyes to the small crease between his b
XXXII: What Am I Supposed To Do?~XENOS~I stood outside her door, staring at the wood between us. I had never felt so helpless standing outside a door before.Not because I couldn't open it. Of course, I could.I was King. If I wanted to, I could order the guards to remove it from its hinges and I would be standing inside her room within seconds.But I didn't want to force my way into the one place Roenna had chosen to hide from everyone.Especially not me… I had watched her run from the hall, the same way she ran from her Mother the other day. And the worst part was knowing exactly what she must have thought.She must have thought that I had left her in front of everyone… and I had released her hand and gone to another woman and her child as though the woman standing beside me moments earlier had suddenly become insignificant.My hand curled into a fist. I hadn't even realized I'd stopped breathing u
XXXI: The Loop I Can't Escape.~ROENNA~My breath caught. I expected Odessa to show up, but not just right here in the announcement ceremony with a King.I really didn't have a place anymore, did I? Xenos and I still wouldn't mean anything because she'd always existed before I ever came into the picture. If anything, I was the one trying to take a place that was hers. Whispers started in the hall, and then slowly, migrated into murmurs… not loud enough to disrespect the royal presences, but loud enough that I could hear them. I didn't shout, or walk away. I stood, my hand still locked with Xenos. I wanted to see his next move. The boy Odessa led in looked exactly like Xenos— he had his nose, his smile… and in less than a minute, all the guests had connected the dots. “I have been a bad woman, Xenos." She stepped forward, bringing the boy forward with their hands locked. "But I had my reasons and I explained each of them to you.” This was not only humiliating. It was condescend
XXX: What About The Past?~XENOS~“You should walk into that hall with a smile, Xenos." Lowell patted my shoulder. I stared at his reflection in the mirror. He looked happy— everyone was. King Xenos Nikolai was finally announcing his mate after many years. I was… maybe, though. "Xenos.” He held my shoulder, looking at me through the mirror. I kept my face straight and tight, not even the smallest smile evident on it. "You're not going to let your mind be elsewhere.” He whispered and I nodded. "You're finally getting your woman and showing her to the world today.” "Hmm.” My wolf admitted, but I couldn't keep this dirty frown off my face."Xen.” He called my name again for what seemed to be the umpteenth time. "It's as simple as showing your face to the world.” Yes. It was that simple, but not when I felt like shit. Not when I felt like I was losing my own sanity— and I was caught between two t
XXIX: A New Path With Thorns.~ROENNA~“Open the doors.” I turned to the guard at the entrance of the palace cell and he bowed, reaching for the keys in his pocket. My Mother and sister sat inside the cell, their lips dry and skins pale as ever. They'd grown weak to even say a word. It didn't please me to look at them like that, but, I changed my mind. I had Xenos detain them— because I wanted to prove a point. I blinked back my tears as I watched them rise to their feet. Only Isabel had constant meals brought to her in the last three days… I made the guards detain them until now. “Do you hate us, sister?" Isabel's voice cracked as the door opened and she saw me. I blinked harder so my tears wouldn't fall. I didn't. I wished I knew how to. "Mother can barely stand.” She sniffled, holding my Mother up with both hands. I almost stepped forward instinctively, but my wolf stayed back. My wolf didn't allow me. “This is all I'm getting after raising you, isn't it?” I bit down on







