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Chapter Thirty: The Days After You

Author: Jhumie_writes
last update Last Updated: 2025-05-21 20:02:58
The days before my engagement passed in a blur of silence.

I didn’t go anywhere. Didn’t answer my phone. Didn’t see Victor.

I stayed in my studio, surrounded by unfinished canvases and unopened paint tubes. I let the world turn without me.

There was music, always. Songs I didn’t know the lyrics to. Songs that said everything I couldn’t. Sometimes I danced, alone, barefoot, with wild, aching movements that meant nothing and everything. Sometimes I lay on the wooden floor and stared at the ceiling for hours, tracing the tiny cracks in the plaster like they might spell out a reason for all this.

But mostly, I just… existed.

I didn’t cry.

Crying meant I understood what I’d lost.

And I didn’t. Not fully. Not enough to name it.

What was I grieving?

A man who wasn’t mine? A mistake I kept repeating? A touch I’d sworn I’d never feel again and still craved like breath?

It shouldn’t have felt like heartbreak.

It was just sex.

Just a secret. A shame.

I was engaged to Victor.

Sweet, devoted, smili
Jhumie_writes

This chapter was one of the hardest to write, because heartbreak that doesn’t have a name is sometimes the most painful kind. Ivy is grieving something she can’t even claim as hers, and that ache, that hollow, suffocating ache, is so human. So many of us have felt it; the loss of a “what if,” the silence after something forbidden but unforgettable. Thank you for feeling this story with me. We’re approaching the edge of everything now. Keep holding on. – With love, JW

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