Chapter 4

Y0urM1n3 “Hello my Angel”

I grinned as the computer dinged and I saw the message from my newest friend. It had been a a few days, I hadn’t seen him online and I wondered if I ever would.

LuvNHugs “Hello :-)”

Y0urM1n3 “I hope you are well Angel, I’ve thought about you.”

My heart beat faster already as I recalled the many times I had replayed our previous chat in my mind as I touched myself.

LuvNHugs “I thought about you too, I’m well thanks. I hope you are too”

I was aware of how awkward and formal this seemed but I didn’t know what else to say.

Y0urM1n3 “Tell me more about you Angel, what color is your hair?”

No harm in telling him right? This was just virtual.

LuvNHugs “Auburn, it’s curly and long, to my waist.”

Y0urM1n3 “Mm sounds beautiful, and your eyes?”

LuvNHugs “Green, really green.”

Y0urM1n3 “Perfect combination Angel, I have blue eyes and well mostly Dark brown hair, I’m afraid there’s a few grays in there now.”

LuvNHugs “I’m sure it’s wonderful, works for George Clooney right?

Y0urM1n3 “You’re very sweet, you like Clooney?”

Well of course I’d drooled over Dr Doug Ross in ER just like every other hot blooded woman.

LuvNHugs “Sure, he’s pretty hot.”

Y0urM1n3 “Hmm… what else do you think is hot Angel?”

I sat back at that question, did he mean what did I like to look at such as muscled guys or was it a broader question?

LuvNHugs “I’m not sure what you mean?

Y0urM1n3 “**Grin** You know… tell me what gets you going when you’re with a guy? What turns you on?”

Oh! My mind conjured a million stories I could tell him. He would be more interested in someone who was sexually experienced right? But, I had been truthful so far and before I knew it I was typing.

LuvNHugs “Well, I don’t really know, I’ve never been with anyone?”

Why did I feel the need to tell this guy everything? I didn’t know, I just had this feeling, this instinct that it would be O.K.

There was a long pause. I started to wonder if I had been wrong, if I had spooked him. I was just about to type something when he responded.

Y0urM1n3 “Never? With anyone? You’re a virgin?”

I realized I’d been holding my breath and let it go slowly as I answered.

LuvNHugs “Yeah”

Another pause. I could feel tears stinging my eyes and I cursed myself, how could I be upset I barely knew the guy?

Y0urM1n3 “I never thought anyone got to 20 a virgin anymore… Angel… your writing? This is all fantasy? You’ve done other stuff with guys?”

Well I was telling him everything right?

LuvNHugs “No, truth is, I’ve not even been kissed. It just didn’t happen, I’m kinda picky, and I guess, broken”

Y0urM1n3 “*Frown* Why broken my Angel?”

LuvNHugs “I just don’t know how to do all that in real life, when any guy got close I just freak out and push him away, afraid he’d hurt me… but I’m hurting myself… why am I telling you this? I’m sorry, I guess you prefer more actual experience.”

Tears were flowing down my cheeks, this somehow felt like a release I needed. I knew though, it would mean he would go and find someone with real experience to play with.

Y0urM1n3 “I asked you Angel, don’t be sorry. I really appreciate your honesty, you’re very brave… and for the record, you write hotter stories than any so called ‘experienced’ woman I’ve known if our last experience was anything to go by. "

I sobbed, needing that validation so much. I didn’t think I could ever be this honest in person.

LuvNHugs “Thank you, you’re so kind. But you aren’t here to be my therapist.”

Y0urM1n3 “Angel… I told you, you’re mine now, and I will be whatever you need. *Hugs you tightly*”

I closed my eyes and imagined strong arms surrounding me, pulling me close to his hard hot body and my breathing slowed.

Soon I was telling him everything about my life, about the experience in high school, the sheltered life I’d led surrounded by people 2 generations older. His responses continued to be patient and kind, he asked questions and genuinely seemed interested. I realized we’d be talking for a couple of hours, it was getting late, the city was dark.

LuvNHugs “I’ve been wittering on for hours, I’m sorry, you didn’t come here for this?”

Y0urM1n3 “Angel, I came to talk to you, and I’ve enjoyed every minute. What did you think I wanted?”

LuvNHugs “I thought you would want… to finish our picnic.”

Y0urM1n3 “Oh I intend to do just that sweet Angel, and so much more… but you’ve been so open, I think you deserve to know a little more about me. If you’re interested.”

LuvNHugs “Definitely interested”

I answered quickly, I suddenly wanted to know everything.

Y0urM1n3 “You’ve been so honest with me Angel, I will do the same, but you may not like all of it.”

I took a deep breath, the least I could do was have an open mind. He had been so accepting of me.

LuvNHugs “You’ve listened to me, I’ll do the same, I’m not quick to judgment.”

Y0urM1n3 “Well, I’ll get the worst out there first, at least what I think is the worst. I’m married, and I know it’s such a cliche, but we really do live separate lives. She is out right now with her friends and I know she sees other guys, and she knows I’m not faithful either.”

It wasn’t what I expected, and yet at the same time I asked myself why didn’t I?

LuvNHugs “I’m sure you have your reasons. My mom always says nobody knows what goes on in another person’s marriage but them. If you both know though, why not divorce?”

Y0urM1n3 “*Smiles* It’s a good question Angel, but I can’t do that to her. I do care about her, an awful lot, but we quickly found out we weren’t a good fit. We signed a Pre-Nup and she would be left with nothing if we divorced. She doesn’t work, kind of a professional wife if you know what I mean; hosting parties and on my arm looking pretty for the right people. She hasn’t had any other life, but we haven’t slept together for years. So we agreed to this arrangement. It isn’t ideal but right or wrong I made a commitment to her so here we are.”

LuvNHugs “You’re a good man.”

Y0urM1n3 “*Wicked Grin* Sweet Angel, I am anything but that.”

I smiled, I could picture that wicked grin and it made my thighs clench.

He continued to tell me he was newly appointed CEO of a large company, no kids, came from a family who had brought themselves up from almost nothing. So he was raised to know the value of hard work. He told me about the other women, mostly one night stands he found in bars.

LuvNHugs “So, what brought you to the chat room? Sounds like you have a pretty healthy sex life.”

Y0urM1n3 “Oh Angel, my sweet innocent girl, there is so much more to be had than just a regular release. I guess I was looking for a connection, someone to be interested in something other than my money. Here, I’m anonymous… well not quite so much with you now it seems. *Grins*”

I blushed, I suddenly felt so inadequate, I knew so little.

LuvNHugs “From what I know, you seem like a good guy, someone who deserves all the best things in life, certainly more than a wife you don’t love and a sexually repressed student who writes a bit.”

Y0urM1n3 “Angel, if only life was so simple, and stop putting yourself down, you’re taking your time exploring your sexuality, and there’s nothing wrong with that.”

LuvNHugs “There’s not much right with it either”

I scoffed, and immediately regretted it.

LuvNHugs “I’m sorry, you were being kind.”

Y0urM1n3 “Angel, I was being honest, and I want so much to see the day you believe you are as wonderful as I do.”

LuvNHugs “But you barely know me?”

Y0urM1n3 “I know enough… sweet Angel I need to go, I’ve enjoyed tonight so much.”

LuvNHugs “Oh OK, sweet dreams…. I need a name for you like you have for me”

Y0urM1n3 “*Grin* how do you feel about calling me Sir?”

I shuddered, the suggestion causing me to blush from my chest right to the tips of my ears.

LuvNHugs “I feel great Sir, goodnight.”

Y0urM1n3 “Sweet dreams, my Angel, we will talk again soon. *Kisses you softly*”

And he was gone and I had to admit my heart ached a little, how could someone I’d never met affect me like this?