CHAPTER 135

"Oh." Mike frowned. "Um, Sweet Pea is...gone. She did this thing where she ate a witch, turned her into a plant, and then had me impregnate her or something prior to wandering off to parts unknown. As far as I know, Sweet Pea is...gone."

Amymone's face darkened, and thin lines formed in the bark of her skin. "Oh, please tell me you aren't making this up."

"I'm not. I wish I was. But if you have any idea where Sweet Pea hid it, then I could have the centaurs keep their eyes out for it."

"It's true, an entire herd of them live in the greenhouse now!" Yuki took Amymone's hand in her own. "Don't give up hope!"

"Oh, I gave up hope a long time ago." The dryad groaned and slumped back on the dry ground beneath her, limbs outstretched. "Never thought Sweet Pea would need to be pollinated so soon. Damn."

"I'm really sorry." Mike didn't know what else to say. "What does your heart wood look like?"

"It's literally a piece of wood from the middle of my tree." She stared at the sky, her eyes unblinking. "When I gave it to Sweet Pea, I made it look just like the wood from the jungle, in case it ever got spotted. I very much regret my decision now. I should have just buried it on the other side of the yard."

Mike said nothing while Yuki tried to comfort her friend. His eyes kept traveling up to the house itself, and he would sometimes see Emily's face vanish from sight.

"What is this place?" he asked. "I mean, why is there a copy of the house here?"

"Hmm?" Amymone looked up at him. "Oh, right. You're looking at the house when it's asleep. When the Caretaker dies, the home slumbers and goes somewhere else. Rather than leave a giant hole in the ground, this house replaces it. That way, if someone breaks in or attempts to do harm, the real home is protected and this place acts as a decoy."

"How do you know all this? Don't you sleep when the home does?"

"Nope." She grinned. "Naia and I take care of the house while it sleeps. She is tied to the fountain, and me to my...well, anyway, when the house falls asleep, the occupants are carried with it, and Naia stays behind to wait for the new Caretaker. Once she bonds with him or her, this place comes here once more. I actually got stuck here when I died, and when the home slept, I got to haunt the real world for a little bit. Oh, that reminds me!" She turned to Yuki. "Jenny escaped the Vault before the house fell asleep, so she's probably roaming around and causing trouble. Might want to be a priority when you get back."

"Already taken care of," Mike told her. "We're on good terms now."

"Seriously?" Amymone looked at him in awe. "This guy is the real deal, isn't he?"

"Most days," Yuki said with a smile.

"Jenny did try to kill me, first," Mike added. "It's kind of a theme."

Emily's wailing pierced the air, and everyone winced.

"So I get why you're here," Mike said. "But why is she up there?"

"No idea. That cunt showed up a couple years back and never comes out of her room." Amymone scowled. "Some days, she'll just stare at me for hours. I have no idea what that's about, and she seems to be putting on a special show for you two, because she's all about her Cecilia impression today."

Cecilia. Mike realized that plenty of time had passed, and it was about time they got going. "So, do you have any ideas how we can get back?" he asked. "That Cerberus wasn't very friendly at all."

"I've had no problem with it, but I'm supposed to be here. You, however, are not. Hell's guardian is actually one of several three-headed dogs in charge of making sure souls don't just traverse the spiritual plane. It's not just about Hell, but anywhere connected to here. I suspect that you are on the Cerberus shit-list as long as you are wandering around out there. So no, I don't know how you can avoid it." The dryad chewed her lip for a moment, then looked up at the window. "However...she might."

Mike looked back up at the bedroom window, then back at Yuki. "Can I tell you how much I hate this?"

"You can tell me about it, but..." Yuki summoned a spear of ice. "I'm about to go up there and find out what happens if you try to kill something that is already dead."

He nodded, then looked back at the window. The idea of talking to Emily gave him a serious case of the creeps, because he had no idea what she might be capable of. So far, other than wailing in agony, she had done nothing else, but he had learned long ago that he should never assume weakness in anyone or thing he encountered.

"Let's go together." He walked toward the back door and opened it. Yuki walked inside, leaving a frosty trail of pawprints on the floor. She held her spear of ice in one hand and a handful of tarot cards in the other.

"Hold up," he said when they were at the stairs. "She seems content upstairs. I want to do a quick check down here, just to make sure there isn't anything lying in wait that can trap us."

She nodded, and gave the stairs a dirty look before they did a sweep of the bottom floor.

The house was different. There were rooms that didn't exist in his version of the home, and he wasn't at all surprised that he only remembered them now that he was here in the Underworld. Memories of his first day in the home with Beth giving him a tour of the house came back to him, and he couldn't help but smile. He had had no idea what he had gotten into, and it was weird to think that he had actually been walking through this place, only to have the real house swap out on him.