Husband of the Dead, Life of the Party

"Michael Chandler, you heartless bastard! How dare you show your face here? Give me back my daughter!"A middle-aged woman dressed in black grabbed me and began yanking at me frantically. She was my mother-in-law, Jasmine Cross, and it took a lot of force to pry her hand off my brand-new suit."Don't even think about laying a finger on me," I said. "This suit is very expensive. If you tore it, you wouldn't even be able to pay for it, even if you sold your house."Jasmine's eyes were red and swollen by then, and her voice had gone hoarse. "You brute! You animal! I never should have let Evie marry you! Otherwise, she'd still be alive!"Her eyes were burning with murderous intent. She had a point, however. Back then, Evie Sandoval had ignored her family's protests and married me in secret, behind her parents' backs. But so what if that was true? It wasn't like I had forced her at gunpoint to marry me."Look, Mom, don't you think that you're the one going too far here? Marriage is a

"I'm at the entrance of the venue now, Mr. Chandler. I'll be right there," Steve Brooks said. A short while later, several doctors in white coats found me in the crowd."Thank you so much for your great contributions to the medical field, Mr. Chandler. Please allow me to thank you on behalf of all the doctors in our field."I brushed my hair back and shook Steve's hands. "There's no need to be so polite. After all, Evie's already dead, so there's no point in keeping her anyway."Hank and Jasmine were completely taken aback by this sudden turn of events. After a few seconds of stunned silence, Hank finally reacted."And who the hell are you?" he shouted. "What are you doing at my daughter's funeral?"Steve was just about to reply when I suddenly smacked myself on the forehead and exclaimed, "Oh man, I completely forgot to inform you and Mom about this!"So here's the thing. I told Dr. Brooks to collect Evie's body today, since she still has organs that could be donated."As I tal

I glanced at Steve, who was still in a daze below the platform, and picked up the microphone. "Dr. Brooks, you can still run a DNA paternity test on a dead person, can you?"Steve was stunned for a moment. He then nodded slowly."Great. Then, if you would kindly assist us on this matter, Dr. Brooks.""No way!""No!"Hank and Ned yelled at the same time, terrified. A split second later, Hank suddenly retrieved a lighter from his pocket and threw it at the casket. The flower wreaths immediately caught on fire.The fire spread quickly and swallowed the entire casket within minutes."Are you out of your mind, Hank Sandoval?"Officer Brewer hurriedly began evacuating the crowd."Hahaha! You didn't see that happen, did you, Michael? Now, you don't have proof anymore! We'll see how you're going to continue running your mouth!" Hank exclaimed in glee.Ned also looked unusually excited. "By the way, there's something else you don't know. Your wife already gave me the password to her o

Hank said, "Evie said that she never loved you. She also said that—""Shut up!" I balled my hands into fists, suppressing my anger. "I've already given you the money! Now release her at once!"As Hank bent over to pick up the card from the ground, Evie suddenly shoved him away. Officer Brewer jumped at the opportunity to pull out his gun and fire a shot at Hank.There was a loud bang, followed by a thud as Hank fell to the floor."Quick, save her!"Paramedics rushed in as soon as the words were out of my mouth. As they loaded Evie onto a stretcher and wheeled her past me, her lips moved faintly like she was apologizing to me.I turned my head away, pretending not to see it.Hank had been shot in the arm, and he was now lying on the floor, howling in pain.I slowly walked over to him and removed the card from his feet. "Serves you right."Ned was also led into a police car.Finally, the entire farce was over.I walked out of the funeral home and realized that it had begun to