Chapter 5

“If Ryan doesn’t want to, I’ll drink as my penalty.”

With that, Sophie picked up the glass and squeezed her eyes shut.

A hand suddenly reached out from behind her and pressed the glass back down.

“You’re allergic to alcohol, and you’re still trying to drink? Are you out of your mind?”

“Then what am I supposed to do?” Sophie said. “If I don’t finish the dare, I have to take the penalty.”

Ryan looked at her, then lifted her chin.

“You really couldn’t choose anyone but me?”

“No.”

Blushing, Sophie grabbed Ryan by the collar, rose onto her toes, and kissed him tentatively.

This time, Ryan did not pull away.

Instead, he slid a hand around Sophie’s waist and deepened the kiss.

“Ryan, you absolute legend!”

The cheering and laughter around them grew louder and louder, while my heart felt as if it had been dropped into boiling oil, burning so badly I could barely breathe.

Even though I had already told myself I no longer cared about him, seeing that scene still hurt.

A relationship of more than ten years could not be ripped out of my heart without tearing something open.

At eleven fifty that night, something small suddenly hit my bedroom window.

A pebble.

It was the secret signal Ryan and I had shared for years.

For one second, I truly wished I could forget everything.

I leaned out to look.

Standing downstairs was Ryan, the same Ryan who had just been wrapped around Sophie moments ago.

His voice was coaxing and unsteady.

“Emma... stop being mad. Be good... Change your application...

“The UK is great... When we get there... I’ll take you to see Big Ben...”

When I went downstairs, I could smell alcohol on him.

His words came out slow and heavy, nothing like his usual arrogant self.

Honestly, wouldn’t it have been nice if he had always been like this?

If he had coaxed me until I became some hopeless girl in love, loving him with everything I had.

Thank God he had not.

“Emma, the UK is great too.

“If you want to see the Eiffel Tower, we can go whenever you want. It’s only a five hour flight.

“You’ve never been away from me before. You cry if you don’t see me for a single day. I don’t want you crying, so I’m letting you keep following me...”

In the version of this scene I had imagined for myself, I was supposed to slap him coldly, then turn and walk away with dignity.

But right then, my feet would not move.

So I took a deep breath and pushed Ryan away.

“Stop pretending to be drunk.”

Panic flickered through his eyes, but he immediately acted as if he had no idea what I was talking about.

Ryan, you really were such a disappointment.

Even now, why were you still so cowardly and dishonest?

“There’s no time, Emma. Let’s deal with the important thing first.”

He grabbed my hand and tried to unlock my phone.

“Be good. The UK is really great. Once this is over, you can be as angry as you want.

“I’ll listen to you from now on.”

I froze where I stood.

“So even now, you still won’t just tell me the truth?”

“Is that necessary?” he said. “You already know anyway.”

I was insane.

Absolutely insane for wasting even one more second on him.

I shoved him hard, sending him crashing to the ground.

Then I walked away while Ryan shouted desperately behind me.

“Emma, don’t regret this!”

Even now, he was still trying to threaten me.

I turned back and held up my phone.

“It’s twelve oh one.”

Ryan’s expression was almost impressive.

I went back to my room and threw myself into the dark.

One last time.

I would let myself fall apart one last time.

I would be sad over him one last time.

But just as dawn began to break, my mom pushed open my door.

“What happened between you two? Ryan came over first thing this morning.”