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Hoping? Falling?
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I See You, Rockstar Whatever I Want To do
“Meredith?”Rupert is falling for me?A bitter smile spread on my lips. "Impossible." I exasperatedly sighed. Then, I refilled my glass of iced tea and drank it. "There's Ava," I finally said, ruining their nonsense conclusions."Who the heck is that Ava?!" Minzy slammed the table with her fist."Hey girl! The table might break! Oh gosh! You’re no one but a broke college student! Get a grip of yourself!” Cherry went back to Minzy's side to calm her down. The alcohol was really making her lose her mind. Then she turned to me. "Who is Ava? Why is she in the picture?"I felt a pang of pain in my chest. Why is there an Ava? She’s not here but she was still part of the picture."Ava is dead. But she's Rupert's first love and he's not yet over her," I said, running my hand through my hair out of frustration. I just realized I didn’t want to talk about her. I was feeling angry for no reason."F-First love? Bullshit," Minzy hissed, "No one ends up with their first love, Meredith. Technically
I See You, Rockstar Can I?
“This is my life, Rupert.”Right after I said that, the tears doubled. The next thing I knew, my knees felt weak and I fell on the cold hardwood floor. I cried. My shoulders were shaking. My sobs turned to mourning weeps."I know you think of our relationship as something that only revolves about pleasure and bed, Meredith. Indeed, we're enjoying each other's company. But I'm not a heartless man just like what you thought of me." To my surprise, Rupert suddenly knelt in front of me. He cupped my face and that's when I saw the emotions in his eyes. He smiled and then wiped away my tears. "You only have thirty more minutes to cry. After that, I will punish you for drinking and for putting yourself in a dangerous situation because of alcohol."My mouth dropped open as Rupert kissed my eyes. "Your face is so red. That indicates acidosis, Meredith Kaye." His right hand went down from my cheek down to the side of my left chest. The pad of his thumb caressed the side of my breast, igniting a
I See You, Rockstar Envy
" Ava ... Ava ..."My head was terribly aching and my body felt so sore but these constraints didn't stop me from waking up. The bed, where I was lying, kept on moving and shaking. As I opened my eyes, my head started spinning because of dizziness. An unfamiliar white ceiling greeted my sight and a heavy thing was weighing my bare stomach, disallowing me to sit up. I could feel the terrible soreness in between my legs and my face turned into a deep frown because of the pungent smell of the alcohol lurking all over me.I didn't remember much of what happened or where I was but I didn't have time to think about it because my gaze went to the arm that was tightly wrapped around my waist."Ava ... Don't ... Please ..."Rupert was beside me, his arm was wrapped around my waist and his face was on the crook of my neck. He was mumbling ... More like groaning ... And having a nightmare.His arms tightened around my waist as I tried to remove his arm. "Ava ..."There he was again. It seems l
I See You, Rockstar Not meeting in the middle
"Yes. I know. You told me once." Rupert suddenly lifted me from my seat before pushing me slightly forward in the vanity mirror so he could squeeze himself into the bench. He wasn't wearing anything for Pete's sake!I looked at him confused when he sat on the bench and then made me sit on his lap. He immediately wrapped his arms around my waist before leaning his chin on my shoulder. "Ava's birthday was in April," he added before pressing his nose on the crook of my neck.My mouth fell open at what he said. "My birthday was in January, Rupert," I said incredulously again, not comprehending the fact that the earrings were maybe for me?"I bought these earrings last week. And yes, that's for you, Meredith Kaye. Don't ask me why I bought it for you. I'm also not sure why I thought of you when I saw that," he explained, sounding bewildered.I could feel the tickle creeping up my body because Rupert was currently naked and I could feel his hard length against my behind. He was poking me an
I See You, Rockstar Fears
It was the day of my executive check-up. I didn't attend any of my classes today and Tita Bernadeth would meet me at the hospital. I was wearing a simple button down black crop top and wide-legged pants. My long hair was falling freely behind my shoulders and there was a light pink tint on my lips to hide the paleness.I heaved a deep sigh and cleared my thoughts.Not yet, Meredith Kaye Santiago. Stop overthinking, I told myself, trying to control the depressive mood I was feeling the moment I opened my eyes today.After staring at myself in front of the mirror for a few minutes, I just moved when I heard my phone ring. I took my handbag and scooped it in my shoulder before I picked up the ringing phone from the top of my desk.I smiled when I saw Bailey's name on the caller's ID."Hey," I tried to sound lively but failed miserably. And my best friend seems to have noticed that.She sighed on the other line. | I know you're scared and nervous. Do you want to go with me? We haven't se
I See You, Rockstar Bad Feeling
I walked after him and tried my hardest to convince him to go to his exam. But when we reached his motorbike, he still didn't follow me.He took a helmet and handed it to me but I didn't take it. "You're not going with me," I said with conviction and then took a step back when he tried to put the helmet on my head. "Attend your exam. I can manage myself. You don’t really have to come with me,” I insisted."Can you?” He heaved a deep sigh before he ran his hand through his naturally-disheveled hair. “Who were you talking to earlier? You even told him you're scared. Is he coming? Is that the reason why you don't want me to come?"I bit my bottom lip before avoiding his gaze. I wanted him to go with me in this check-up and held my hand to comfort me. Lately, he was the only person I confided with all my inner thoughts and hesitations. He was my comfort zone for the past few days.But I was afraid of the consequences of my results today. If it's not going to be okay, it would be better if
I See You, Rockstar Suffering
I stared at the big and orange setting sun in front of me. The sky was a mixture of pink, purple, and orange colors. I was standing in front of the big window of Dr. Baller's office, wearing my original clothes early this morning while my hair was put in a loose bun. My arms were crossed in front of my chest while watching the sun to slowly bid its goodbye for the day.I was the only person in the office because I had to change clothes from the hospital gown I wore all day. The nurse who assisted me told me, Dr. Baller and my guardian, Auntie Bernadeth and maybe Bailey, would meet me in this office to discuss the results of my tests.The check-up went a bit longer than usual. And by that simple fact, I already knew that some bad news would greet me at the end of this day.I hadn't seen Aunt Bernadeth and Bailey after I was subjected to a mammogram or a breast x-ray. That was maybe after lunch. Then, I underwent a full blood test and some other medical tests to check for my vitals.It
I See You, Rockstar Craving for His Comfort
The cold breeze of the wind and the darkness of the night wrapped around me as I stood at the edge of the rooftop. I held on tightly to the railings that reached high up to my waist. The railing was the only hindrance I had to not take a step foot forward and fall from this tall height.I didn't know how many hours I'd been here on the rooftop of my dorm building, standing and watching the people below me, busy with their lives. As soon as I came from the hospital, I went straight here.From this height, it was easy to see how people tried so hard in living this life. Everything was fast-paced and everyone was trying not to get left behind. That's how normal life works; it's about worrying how to keep up in this fast-paced world.My grip tightened on the rooftop railings at the same time as the anger I was feeling intensified. I was already delayed in my life because of my cancer. The people I was with when I started had left me behind. I had missed too many opportunities because of
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