Thirty two: Is He Dead?

Travis 

The last thing I remembered was Carlos's hands.

They were still around me, still fighting to keep me from breaking free, and I was still fighting back with everything I had. My lungs burned. My throat felt like it was closing up. I couldn't think clearly anymore.

And then, the sound of a crash appeared. The sound that ripped through everything.

Metal screamed and glass exploded.

The car lurched forward so violently that my body was thrown against the seat. My face was buried in the safety pillow, but not before I got hit on my head by something. And for a moment, there was nothing.

No sound. No pain. Nothing.

Then my consciousness came back like merging pieces of a broken glass.

First came the ringing in my ears.

Then the taste of blood.

Then the pain.

God!

The pain was quite unbearable.

A sharp throbbing sensation that exploded through my skull. My chest felt as though someone had dropped a concrete block on it. My ribs screamed every time I tried to breathe, and my neck refused to move without sending another wave of agony through me.

I opened my eyes.

Everything was blurry.

For a few seconds, I didn't know where I was.

The windshield was shattered. Cracks spread across what remained of the glass like spiderwebs. One of the doors had been pushed inward, the metal bent into a shape that didn't look possible.

Smoke—or maybe dust—hung inside the car.

The engine made a terrible clicking sound somewhere in front of me.

Tick. Tick Tick. Only that it wasn't a clock or an alarm clock.

There was the faint hiss of something leaking beneath the hood.

I tried to move but the pain shot through my shoulder.

I groaned and immediately regretted it.

My hands trembled as I pushed myself upright.

That's when I remembered.

Carlos…

My eyes searched the wreckage.

And I saw him.

My heart stopped.

“Carlos?”

My voice barely came out.

He wasn't moving.

His body was partially outside the broken side of the vehicle, thrown through the damaged glass during the impact. His back rested awkwardly against the splintered wood of the tree we'd crashed into.

For a moment, I couldn't understand what I was looking at.

I stared at him.

Waiting anxiously.

Expecting him to move.

To curse.

To tell me to shut up or even bark at me.

I wanted him to do anything but stay there like that.

But he didn't.

“Carlos…” I muttered, trying to reach him. But my arm restrained me.

I fell against the seat, biting down hard to stop myself from crying out.

The interior of the car looked like a nightmare. The steering wheel was broken out and the dashboard was crushed inward.

Pieces of glass covered the seats and floor, glittering in the weak light that filtered through the broken windows. The windshield was almost completely gone, and the front of the car had folded around the tree as though it had been made of paper.

The smell of gasoline filled the air.

I froze.

What if the car catches fire? 

That was my next thought: that the car might eventually catch fire.

I've seen those scenes a lot in movies.

I tried to breathe through my nose, but even that hurt.

My ribs, my head, my shoulder. Everything hurts.

But none of it mattered.

Not when Carlos was lying there.

I dragged myself toward him, even though every inch felt impossible.

My knees scraped against shattered glass. Something sharp had cut into my palm, but I barely noticed.

“Carlos.”

I swallowed his silence.

My throat was raw from where he'd been choking me.

I reached out with trembling fingers.

I wanted to touch him.

I wanted to shake him.

I wanted to hear him breathe.

But fear stopped me.

What if I touched him and felt nothing?

What if that was the moment I knew?

My hand hovered uselessly in the air.

“No…” The word escaped before I even realized I'd spoken.

“No, no, no... Carlos…”

My breathing became faster.

I crawled closer.

His body remained completely still.

There was something horribly unnatural about seeing someone who had been fighting with me only moments ago now lying motionless.

My mind refused to accept it.

This couldn't be real.

I looked at the tree.

The trunk had punched through the front of the car, tearing metal apart. Splintered wood protruded through the shattered window where Carlos had landed.

My stomach turned.

I looked away.

I couldn't.

I couldn't look at him anymore.

But I couldn't look anywhere else either.

My eyes burned.

“Please…”

I didn't know who I was begging.

God?

Carlos?

Myself?

“Please don't be dead.” My voice cracked.

The tears came before I could stop them.

I pressed my bloody palm against my chest, trying to steady my breathing.

I had spent so much time wanting to get away from him. Wanting to bring him to justice.

Wanting him to die even for what he did to Stephanie.

But now that I see it, I regret it. 

He should live at least, going to jail for his crime would be better.

I want this nightmare to end.

And now that he wasn't moving, all I could think about was how badly I wanted to see him open his eyes.

How cruel was that?

My vision blurred again.

I wiped my face, smearing blood and dirt across my cheek.

Then I tried to move.

My legs shook beneath me.

The moment I put weight on one of them, a bolt of pain shot up my body and I collapsed.

A cry escaped me.

I lay there for several seconds, staring at the clouds.

The world seemed to be spinning.

My ears were dizzy.

My body was screaming.

But somehow, I forced myself back up.

I had to get out. I knew I had too.

The thought came slowly.

The gasoline.

The crushed engine.

The broken wires.

The smoke.

What if the car explodes?

We couldn't stay inside this car.

I looked at Carlos again.

My heart sank.

How was I supposed to leave him?

How could I walk away from him like this?

“Carlos…”

Still nothing.

I crawled toward the front of the car where he laid and pushed myself to stand.

I tried to pull Carlos from the top and carry him, but he only dropped down hard.

If there was any pain he was feeling, I might have just added to it.

“Damn it!” I groaned, hitting my fist against the metal.

Pain exploded through my hand which made me scream.

Then I laughed.

A broken, miserable laugh.

“I’m I going to die?” I asked myself.

And a terrible thought settled inside my mind.

He's gone.

I squeezed my eyes shut.

A tear slipped down my cheek.

“I'm sorry…”

My voice was barely a whisper.

“I'm so sorry, Carlos.”

“Travis—” I heard my name. It was faint, but still complete that I could realize it was me.

“You did this….?” His eyes weren't open, but he was forcing himself to speak.

“Shh…” I muttered, crawling towards him quickly and placing my hands around his chest.

He was alive and that matters right now.

And for the first time since the accident, I stopped fighting the tears.

“You’re going to be alright.” I said to him, while running my hand through his face.

I heard the sound of an approaching vehicle.

I needed to get out of here. I know I do.

I shouldn't be seen in t

he woods.

Crawling away, I heard Carlos dying breath. 

It was like he was fighting to stay alive.

There was nothing I could do to help, instead I fled so I wouldn't be seen.

I hid at the back of a tree and waited for whoever was coming.

I hope whoever it is would be the hope Carlos needs.