Chapter 3

POV: Ava Carter

I stood outside the arena with my hands in my jacket pockets and let the ocean wind hit my face and for exactly thirty seconds I forgot who I was supposed to be. The sky was wide and grey and beautiful and the waves were loud and far away and I just breathed.

Then someone called out Noah's name and I snapped back.

The charity game was packed. Local families, younger kids with foam fingers, coaches from three different academies sitting in the stands with their arms crossed and their eyes sharp. The Falcons filed in through the side entrance and I kept my helmet bag over my shoulder and my head slightly down and focused on walking like Noah. Loose. Easy. Confident without trying.

I was getting better at it. Then I heard his voice.

"Noah!"

My stomach folded completely in half. Liam Brooks came through the crowd like sunlight through a window. Tall, easy smile, broad shoulders under a blue Eagles jacket with the captain's patch stitched on the chest. I had known Liam Brooks since I was eleven years old. He had eaten dinner at our house more times than I could count. He was Noah's best friend.

He was also the reason I had spent three years pretending I did not have feelings.

He grabbed me by the shoulder and pulled me into a hug before I could do anything about it and I stood very still with my arms stiff at my sides and my heart absolutely screaming.

"Man, it has been too long," he said. He pulled back and held me at arm's length and looked at my face.

I smiled. Flat. Easy. Noah's smile.

But Liam's eyes did something strange.

They moved across my face slowly. Not suspicious exactly. More like someone hearing a familiar song played slightly differently and not being able to name what changed. His smile stayed but something behind his eyes went quiet and thinking.

"You look different," he said.

"New haircut," I said.

He stared for one second longer than felt comfortable. Then he laughed and shook my shoulder. "Come on. Coach wants a photo before the warm up."

I followed him and told my heart to behave itself.

+++++++

The bonfire was on the beach below the arena parking lot. Someone had dragged out a speaker and the music was low and warm against the sound of the waves. Players from both teams sat around the fire in groups, laughing and throwing things at each other and pretending the scrimmage was not happening in two hours. The sky had gone dark and orange at the edges and the wind was cold and sweet.

I sat a little apart from the main group with my knees pulled up and watched Liam across the fire.

He was laughing at something one of his teammates said. His head went back and his eyes crinkled at the corners and he looked so easy and comfortable inside his own skin. I had always loved that about him. The way he never seemed to be fighting himself.

I was always fighting myself.

"Since when do you look at Brooks like that?"

I turned my head fast.

Kai was sitting two feet away from me on the same log, close enough that his shoulder almost touched mine. I had not heard him sit down. His face was turned toward the fire but his eyes were on me. Calm. Watching. Like always.

"Like what," I said.

"Like that." He tilted his chin toward Liam. "Like you are trying to memorize something."

"I am not looking at him any particular way."

"You have been staring at him for six minutes."

"Are you counting?"

Kai looked at me directly then. Something flickered in his expression. Quick and gone. "I notice things," he said. "You know that by now."

I looked back at the fire.

"He is Noah's best friend," I said. "We go way back. I am allowed to look at someone I know."

Kai was quiet for a moment. Then he said nothing else. But he did not move away either and I was very aware of exactly how much space was not between us.

+++++++

The scrimmage was not supposed to get ugly. It always got ugly. Kai and Liam had history. Everyone knew it. Two years of tournament clashes and no love lost between them. Liam was a physical player. Kai was a psychological one. When those two things met on the ice the result was never clean.

It started in the second period.

Liam drove into Kai's side and Kai retaliated with a slash across the gloves and the referee called it and Liam got in Kai's face and said something I could not hear and Kai smiled which was worse than anything he could have said back. Both benches got loud. Coach Merritt was on his feet.

I was watching too closely and not watching closely enough.

The play shifted fast. The puck came my direction and I went for it hard. I had it. I was moving, building speed, seeing the opening on the left side of the net.

Then the hit came from my right.

I did not see who it was. It did not matter. It was heavy and brutal and it took my feet completely and I went down hard. The ice came up and I hit it with my shoulder and my helmet cracked against the boards and the world went white for a second and then very loud.

My helmet had shifted.

I grabbed it. Pressed it down. Stayed completely still on the ice.

Get up. You have to get up before anyone gets close. But someone was already there. Kai dropped to one knee beside me before I could move. His glove came off. His bare hand touched the side of my face, turning it gently toward him, checking my eyes the way you do when you are scared and trying not to show it.

"Hey," he said. His voice was low and different. The sharp edges were gone. "Look at me. Are you in there?"

I looked at him.

The whole rink went somewhere far away. It was just his face close to mine and his hand on my jaw and his eyes searching mine with something urgent and unguarded in them that I had not seen before. Something real.

My helmet was still slightly crooked. Neither of us moved. His expression shifted slowly. Something crossing behind his eyes that I could not name. His hand stayed on my face one second longer than it needed to.

Then a shadow fell over both of us.

Liam hit Kai's shoulder hard with both hands and Kai dropped back and stood up fast.

"Get your hands off him," Liam said.

His voice was sharp and tight and it was not about hockey. Not entirely. His eyes moved from Kai to me and back to Kai and his jaw was set hard and his chest was heaving.

Kai looked at him steadily.

The tension standing between all three of us was not about the scrimmage anymore. It was not about rivalry or points or who scored what.

I sat up slowly on the ice and pressed my helmet down and said nothing. Because I had no idea what was happening.

But I had a feeling everything was about to get very complicated..