I Still Wait For You

Dumeny grabs my head between his hands and tilted sideways to have a better access for him. he was kissing me violently. Briefly, our teeth clashes and then his tongue was in my mouth.

Desires explodes like fireworks of fourth of July throughout my body, I was equally kissing him back. Matching his fervour, my hands knotting his hairs, pulling it, hard.

He groans a low sexy sound in the back of his throat that reverberates through me. his hands wandered around my body and settles on my hips. He digs his nails in my bare flesh of my thigh, just enough not to bleed but brings the desire uproot.  

My wolf let out a long painful howl and the reality hits me like a rock on my face. I opened my eyes and tried to pull myself from his arms. It’s not him.

With the final push, I was free from his arms, Dumeny looked hurt and… rejected. Trust me, this was the same expression I got when Reed asked me to reject him. The crowd turned into the ear deafening silence and I sprinted away from them.

“Fuck.” I cried out. What the heck I did? And why? I didn’t like Dumeny. Not in that way. I have kissed him and pushed him away in the cruellest way possible.

“Emmy?” Diana called out from behind and I tried to wiped the stinging tears from my cheek. My makeup was already ruined.

“Hey, everything is fine.” She cajoles, her voice was smooth and soft and it took me seconds to break again in front of her. she holds me tightly until I stopped again. August came running behind us.

“Did he do something…?” he paused and tried not to show his anger on the surface. I shake my head in denial.

“No, he didn’t do anything.” this was all I could muttered. “You both go back to the party; I will be in the house.” I said finally pulling away from Diana. She looked worried but there was something in her eyes I couldn’t put my finger on.

“Are you sure?” August asked again and this time Diana signalled him something and he stopped mid-sentence and nodded to let me go inside.

“If anyone asks about me, told them I am not feeling well.” I said and started walking back to the pack house.

Why the fuck everything happens to me only? Two years ago, I asked moon goddess to blessed me with a mate and now, here I am fucked-up as hell.  Not for a single day, I have closed my eyes without thinking about his ocean blue ones.

Not for a second, I have forgotten his last words before leaving me again. Yes alpha, he said and never looked back.

I know If I have asked Diana about him, she would happily tell me about him but then what? I would have missed him more. Fuck, I miss him now.

I put the key inside the lock and turned the handle. It opened with a clink. The house was covered in the darkness. I let it be that way and walked inside. I could still listen the sound of the music even I am far away from the party. suddenly, the song changed to I Still wait for you by XYLO.

Sometimes I feel like I can't remember

Waking up with you when we were together

I lost my temper, you left at midnight

We saw the tears fall like rain on the headlights

Just when I closed the door, and walked past the hall, my nose hit the familiar scent of cardamom and strawberries. No, Esma, this is your imagination. You miss him, and your mind is fucking with you and so does the music.

After fighting with myself nearly two minutes, I switched on the lights. The light flickers and brightens the whole room blinding me for a second.

Cautiously, I opened my eyes and the first thing I noticed was that the dining chair was moved, and he was sitting on it. He didn’t look at me but probably waiting for me.

He was wearing a linen white shirt and his suit was tucked behind the chair he was sitting. For a moment, I thought I was dreaming or hallucinating, my brain have so much drinks to digest. His left arm was draped over the chair and in his other hand, he was holding a glass filled with amber liquid.

His one leg was draped over his other knee, he was wearing black socks and dress shoes. He wasn’t looking at me and I don’t know how long I was staring at his beautiful features.

“Reed?”

He finally turned and my heart stopped beating seeing his eyes burning with the grave intensity. But his general expression was unreadable, emotionless.

He’s here, fuck, he is really here.

“You are here.” I didn’t realize it was my voice. he regards me coolly and my heart didn’t dare to make any move. I half expect him to say something, but he didn’t say anything and continued to regard me with the blank expression.

I walked towards him not before stopping a few steps from him.

“You are back.” he made a disapproving voice in the back of his throat. Slowly, I make my way towards him, eating the remaining distance between us. The song was fading but we could still hear the girl singing, her voice was crystal clear.

(But every day, I still wait) I still wait for you

(But every day, I still wait) I still wait for you

(But every day, I still wait) I still wait for you

I still wait for you

 He looked at me from the corner of his eye but didn’t protest as I make my way through him and finally crawl on to his lap. It was the most courageous thing I have ever done with him. his eyebrows move fractionally registering the surprise as if he didn’t expect this from me.

It was always you and me

How could we be nothing, nothing?

I know that we don't speak

But if I could ask you one thing, one thing?

His body stiffened the moment I wrapped my arms around him. I ignore his reaction, holding him tightly and press my cheek to his neck. He didn’t push me away which was what I was fearing the most.

“I missed you.” My voice cracks at the last word and I tried to push back the tears. After a beat, he folds his hand around me and buries his nose in my hair.

“I am sorry I pushed you away.” I croaked in the most un-woman way. he tightened his arms.

“Shush. Don’t say anything.” he buried his nose again and inhaled deeply. Don’t know how much longer we have sat on that chair, my tears long dried.

Forget everything we did wrong

'Cause you've been the one

You know this will never change

But every day, I still wait for you

No, I don't want this to be true

This beautiful disaster is you

'Cause you've been the one

You know this will never change

But every day, I still wait for you

I closed my eyes. He smelled same, heavenly. He smells like he had a lot to drink. I finally pulled away from him and looked above to see his beautiful ocean blue eyes, the song completely forgotten.

“I am sorry.” He didn’t say anything as if wanting me to complete my sentence.

I turned his head towards him and as soon as his eyes met mine, he kissed me.

He kisses me hungrily as if he didn’t get the oxygen and I was his air. He released the glass; it breaks as soon as it hit the floor making the shatter noise.

He tilted my chin to have greater access with my mouth and kissed me passionately, it was rough, gentle and sweet, all mixed in same. as if he wants me to feel what he felt in last couple of months.

He pulled back when he was done violating my mouth. My lipstick long gone and traces of it were seen on his.

“Apology accepted.” He breathed.

“Ummm…” I blushed and lowered my gaze. With his index finger, he pulled my chin up to make me look in his eyes.

“What happened?”

“I kissed Dumeny.” I confessed. I don’t want to lie to him. His eyes darkened and jaw ticked in hard line. His fingers digs in my flesh.

“I know. He steal a kiss from you, and I have stolen mine.” He muttered and I almost combust at his words. His honesty disarmed me sometimes and his love make me weak.

“Now, as we are alone, I would like to make the odds same, you kissed someone else.” His eyes darkened even more. With lust, desire? “I am thinking to punish you.” His words were low stained with the upcoming threat.

“And with punishments, I remember kitten, your other punishments are due.” My heart beats like there is a no tomorrow.

His eyes darkened in minutes settling on my cleavage, his fingers digging deep in my thigh.