Chapter Seven

Jack

I waited for Remi to leave before I addressed Lauren. I didn’t want to make Remi more uncomfortable. 

“What the hell was that?”

“I was just stating the truth; she’s the reason you’ve been distant these last few days, right?”

“No.”

It was the truth; I’ve been slowly distancing myself from her for multiple reasons, and the number one reason is, that I don’t want to marry her, but Lauren and her father have done a lot for me, and I feel like I’m obligated to go through with it. It isn’t fair to her; I’ve led her on and she built a life around me.

“You’re lying. You’re a coward because you won’t admit it.”

“Fine, you want the truth?” I yelled. “I don’t want to get married.” Before I started talking again, I took a moment to calm myself. 

“I thought the engagement would solidify our relationship, that all we needed was something exciting to mix things up, but I was wrong. I think I’ve been over this relationship for a while, and I just didn’t want to hurt you.”

“Well, it doesn’t matter; it hurts either way.” She let a sob as she finished the sentence.

“You need to leave, Jack. I think it’s best if we spent some time apart.”

“I agree, and I’m sorry. I never wanted to hurt you because I still love you-”

“But you’re not in love with me.”

I nodded my head to confirm what she said.

“Please leave Jackson.”

I did as Lauren said, and left her apartment, but walked up to Remi’s and I didn’t hesitate to knock on the door. I wanted her to answer it because I’m finally ready to confess my feelings for her. I’m ready to fight for her. 

“Jack?” This may be a bad idea, but I need to be here; I need her.

“Can I come in?”

“Yeah.”

Her apartment had the bare minimum; her living room only had a simple couch and coffee table, but the floor plan was the same as Lauren’s.

“Not to be rude, but are you here for something?”

“I’m sorry you had to witness that, and I’m sorry that she attacked the way you look.”

“It’s fine; I’ve heard it all before.”

“If it means anything, I like the way you look.”

“You shouldn’t say things like that, especially since you and Lauren were just fighting over that.”

“I told her I didn’t want to marry her.”

“Oh.”

“What she said was true. I’ve always wanted you. When I first met you at six years old, I wanted to be your friend but as we got older, I realized those feelings were more than friendship. I was hung up on you, but you seemed to always prefer Tyson.” 

“You were always so mean to me.”

“I thought you preferred Tyson, and it hurt, so I took it out on you.”

Remi let out a laugh. “Only because Tyson was nice to me, and over the years, he became my best friend, but now is not the time to confess things. You just told your girlfriend of over a decade that you don’t want to marry her. Don’t confess your attraction to me at the same time.”

“I’m trying to get everything in the open. I’m tired of settling and hurting people.”

“I’ve spent years trying to get you to notice me, Jack, but you broke me over and over, and if you say that you like me and then you end up working things out with Lauren, it will crush me, so please don’t tell me you want me unless you mean it.”

I took a step, closing the distance between us, cupped her face with my hands, and kissed her. She kissed me back, and it was better than I could ever imagine. Her lips were warm and soft, and she let me take control. Her lips felt like home, it felt like everything I was missing was found, but as I went to pull her closer, she pushed me back.

“This isn’t a good idea, and I think we need to clear our heads. Can you please leave?”

“Are you going to ignore me?”

“No, I just need time to think about what happened.”

“Fine, I see you at work tomorrow.”

I was kicked out of two apartments today and being kicked out of Remi’s apartment bothers me more. I feel bad for leading Lauren on, but I’m happy I told her I didn’t want to marry her. She deserves to find someone that will give her what she wants. 

I didn’t feel like going home, so I did the next thing out of character and called my brother, asking him to meet me for a drink.

***

Sophomore Year of High School

 I’ve been waiting all week to talk to Remi. I haven’t had the chance to talk to her alone, but now that I see her in the backyard on the hammock alone, now is the time. I’m beyond pissed that she’s trying to start shit between me and Tyson by making Lauren look like a bitch.

Her eyes were closed and for a second the anger left me, she looks at peace, but she needs to know she can’t be a brat.

“What is your problem, Remington?” My tone was firm to let her know I wasn’t joking.

“What are you talking about?”

“The shit you said to Tyson, about Lauren talking to you on my behalf. How she said I didn’t want to be around you because you annoy me.”

“It’s the truth.”

“I asked Lauren about it, and she said you told her that she needed to break up with me.”

“She’s lying. Your girlfriend hates me for some reason.”

“Probably because you're spreading lies. She isn’t talking to me right now because of you.”

“I’m sick of this. I think it would be better if we weren’t friends.”

My heart briefly skipped, and I regretted everything I just said. I didn’t want her out of my life. I want her, but I can’t tell her that, she wants Tyson and doesn’t care if I’m happy or not.”

“Maybe that’s for the best. You’ll have Tyson, so you don’t need me to be invited to places.”

She winced at my last statement, and it made me feel jerk, but she needs to feel my pain.

***

Present Day

“I can’t remember the last time you initiated having drinks with me.”

Tyson was smirking at me, and I hated it when he felt like he was right, but I had to get over it because he was right.

“I kissed Remi,” I blurted out. 

“It’s about fucking time you found the courage...wait, what about Lauren?”

“I told her I didn’t want to marry her.”

“Are you sure you’re my brother, Jackson? How did that go down?”

“I’m serious, Ty. I think I might have made things worse.”

“What did Lauren say?”

“This all started because she invited Remi to dinner and then started insulting the way she looked, and I told her to stop, and that turned into a huge argument, and it ended with me telling her I didn’t want to marry her and while I loved her, I wasn’t in love with her.”

“Damn, now tell me about the kiss with Em.”

“I felt like a schoolboy. It felt like my first kiss. I was nervous, but it was probably the best kiss I’d ever experienced. When I tried to take it further, she pushed me away and asked me to leave.”

“Do you think you’ll patch things up with Lauren?”

“I want to be on good terms with her, but I don’t want to continue the relationship.”

“Good, because if you give Em some time, she’ll come around. She’ll kill me for saying this, but it has always been you for her. She hasn’t told me, and she won’t confirm it, but throughout the years, I’ve picked up on some things and I called her out on the crush she had on when we were in high school. I tried kissing her once. We were about seventeen, and she slapped my face. That was the last time I tried to make a move on her.”

“I was always so angry at you, I thought she preferred you. We went to a party our junior year of high school, and when I came out of the room and saw you two standing there, I wanted to kill you. I thought you guys had hooked up.”

Tyson sat there laughing at me. “You got it all wrong. Emi had lost her virginity that night, but I didn’t have the honors. We just ran into each other, and I caught her doing the walk of shame.”

I can’t believe I’ve missed out on years with Remi because I couldn’t just ask what was going on. 

“What should I do?”

“Give Emi time and do not get back with Lauren.”

One of those things is easier said than done. It’s going to be hard to give Remi some space. I want this to work out, and I want her to trust me.