"Roth, wh-what is it...what’s wrong?’ she stammered.
‘What’s wrong? Oh, for God’s sake...’ she heard him mutter. ‘The fact that you even need to ask that kind of question shows,you even need to ask that kind of question shows just how... You’re a child still, Elena... Six months from now...’She bit down hard on her bottom lip when she saw the irritation in his eyes as he ran his hand through his thick dark copper hair.‘I’m sorry... I should never have done that...’ he told her tersely.Elena felt her eyes fill with vulnerable tears.‘You kissed me,’ she protested shakily. ‘You wanted me...’‘No, Elena,’ she heard Roth telling her grittily. ‘What I wanted...’ he told her bluntly, ‘was not you, but what you offered. I’m a man, and when a woman comes on to me, offering me sex...’ He stopped and shook his head. ‘You’re a child still, Elena.’‘I bet if we were in bed together you wouldn’t be saying that,’ Elena challenged him boldly, adding recklessly, ‘I’m not a child at all, Roth, and I could prove it to you...’She heard the savage hiss as he expelled the air from his lungs.‘Dear God,’ she heard him rasp, ‘have you the first idea of what you’re saying...suggesting...?’‘I want you, Roth... I love you...’‘Well, I sure as hell don’t want or love you,’ he told her ferociously, his face suddenly shockingly pale underneath its weather-beaten tan. ‘And let me give you a small warning, Elena: if you continue to go around offering yourself to men, sooner or later one of them’s going to take you up on your offer and I promise you that the experience won’t be a pleasant one. You’re far too young to be experimenting with sex, and when you are old enough it should be with someone of your own age and not... I’m a man, not a boy, Elena,’ he told her brutally, ‘and...well, let’s just say that the idea of taking some over-excited and inexperienced little virgin to bed and playing touchy-feely games with her is not my idea of a particularly satisfying relationship—not sexually, not mentally and certainly not emotionally...‘Go and find someone your own age to play with,’ he told her grimly.For a moment elena was tempted to protest, to argue and plead, or even more daringly to throw herself back into his arms and prove to him that she could make him want her despite her age and her lack of experience. She was not normally so easily defeated or diminished, but something deep down inside,some very new sense of womanliness, shrank from enduring another rejection from him. And so, instead, swallowing back the tears she was aching to cry, she lifted her head and, tilting her chin to him defiantly, said, ‘Yes, I think I will...’There had been one boy in particular in the party of co-workers involved inThere had been one boy in particular in the party of co-workers involved in the conservation campaign who had shown a very marked interest in her. At the time, newly, wildly in love with Rith, she hadn’t paid him very much attention, but now...A militant sparkle illuminated her eyes. She could see Roth beginning to frown.‘Elena,’ he warned. Angrily she refused to stop and listen to him, he had no jurisdiction over her.The bright delicacy of her newly emergent tender love was already tarnishing and fading as resentment, pride and enmity took its place.Roth!She loved him but now she felt as though she could very easily come to hate him—she certainly wanted to hate him.‘YOU’RE not serious...’Elena frowned as she studied the synopsis pinned to the front of the file her employer had just handed her.Michael Velmer the fourth was the kind of eccentric billionaire who, by rights, only ought to have existed in fairy stories—as a particularly genial and indulgent godfather, Sylvie thought. She had been introduced to him at a party to which she had been invited by some acquaintances of her stepbrother’s. She had only gone to the party because she had been feeling particularly lost and insignificant, having only recently left her American college and moved to New York. They had got chatting and Lloyd had begun to tell her about the trials and traumas he had experienced in running the huge wealthy Trust set up by his grandfather.‘What the hell do you think I’m going to do to her?’ Roth had exploded. ‘Takeher to bed and...?’‘Is it really so impossible that you might be tempted to?’ lucas had asked himquietly. ‘I’m not criticising or condemning, Roth; physically she’s mature and sheloves you—or believes she does—’‘She’s got a crush on me that she’ll soon grow out of,’ Roth had interruptedhim grimly. ‘That’s what you want me to say, isn’t it? And I should keep myhands off her until she does grow out of it...out of me... But what if I feeldifferently, Lucas? What if I want...?’ He had shaken his head, angry with himselfas well as with lucas. More angry with himself than he was with lucas who heknew was only doing what he saw as his duty by his stepsister.‘You’re right, she’s a child still, and the sooner she grows up and forgets allabout me the better,’ Roth had told him hardily. ‘And as for taking her to bed,’ hehad thrown at lucas as he turned to leave, ‘well, there’s always a cure for that.’A
It was later that morning that she actually bumped into Wayne, completely bychance. In the two hours since Roth had left she had had more than enough timeto dwell on what had happened and what she had said, and by the time she sawWayne she had convinced herself that it was totally impossible for her ever tosee Roth again...ever to see anyone again who was even remotely connected withhim.‘Hi there, doll,’ Wayne greeted her with a grin. ‘Looks like it’s time to saygoodbye. I’m meeting up with the eco-warriors this afternoon.’Swiftly Elena made up her mind, seizing on the opportunity to make herescape, not just from Roth but from everything that was associated with him—herlove, her shame, and her fear that he would somehow guess that she had lied tohim.‘I’m coming with you,’ she told Wayne determinedly, adding before he couldargue, ‘My stepbrother has sent me some money so I can afford to supportmyself.’‘How much has he sent you?’ Wayne questioned her interestedly.
What is it? What’s wrong?’ she demanded, not understanding. ‘Last night—’‘Last night was a mistake,’ Roth interrupted her curtly. ‘It should never have happened and I wish to God... Why didn’t you tell me you were still a virgin?’‘I... I...’ Elena could feel her eyes starting to fill with tears.This wasn’t how it should be—Roth aloof, cold and distant, almost accusing.‘Roth, I love you,’ she told him shakily. ‘I want us to be together...married...’‘Married? You’re a child still, Elena... Your mother...’‘I’m not a child, I’m nearly twenty,’ she protested frantically.‘You’re a child,’ Roth insisted, ‘and if I’d known... Why didn’t you tell me?Why did you let me think that you and Wayne were lovers?’‘I did tell you but you wouldn’t listen. I thought you’d be pleased...that you’dwant to be the first...the only one...’ she told him pathetically.‘Pleased? Oh, my God.’ Roth started to laugh, a harshly bitter laugh. ‘The onlything that could make this appalling situation
And then, without waiting for his response, she turned her back on him andwalked very slowly and very deliberately to her bedroom door.Once there she turned round and looked at him gravely.He was still standing where she had left him, his face unfamiliarly pale, hiseyes blazing with...Quickly she looked away and then, before her courage could desert her, shetugged open the buttons of her borrowed shirt and shrugged it off.Standing still and naked in full view of Roth whilst he watched her in silencewas probably the hardest thing she had ever had to do, she acknowledged, but,somehow, doing it made her feel strong and brave and very, very womanly.There was an odd glittering brilliance in Roth's eyes, and her stomach musclestensed as she saw the way his jaw tightened as he looked away from her.‘Roth....’ she commanded softly.‘Elena for God’s sake...’Ignoring the tough grimness in his voice, she turned her back and walked fullyinto her small bedroom. Seconds later h
Elena blanched. Lucas had obviously told him about that; she wished that hehadn’t.‘I... He’ll pay me back.’ She defended both Wayne’s request and her ownacceptance of it.‘Things have certainly changed since my time at university,’ Roth told hercynically. ‘Then it was the man who did the chasing, the pursuing, not thewoman who had to secure the man’s attentions by offering him money.’Elena stared at him, unable to keep either her shock or the pain his words hadcaused her from showing in her eyes.‘It isn’t like that... I haven’t been pursuing Wayne. I don’t...’She stopped abruptly and looked away from him. How could she tell Roth ofall men...people...that she didn’t run after his sex, when he had good reason tobelieve otherwise after the ways she had so blatantly revealed her feelings forhim? Now he was looking at her in that horribly cynical way, his mouth twistingin mocking contempt.‘lucas asked me to come,’ he told her as she remained silent. ‘He’s had to goawa
monthly allowance. She had felt uncomfortable about doing so, but after a small pause,when she had stammeringly explained that she had loaned some money to afriend, he had said quietly that she could leave the matter with him.Naively she had assumed that that meant that he would send her a cheque, andsuddenly she’d had more important things to worry about than money. David,her friend, was dead. He had collapsed at a rave party and been rushed intohospital, but it had been too late to save him.His family had taken him home to bury him and they had also made it plainthat they did not want any of his university friends to attend his funeral.‘They blame us for what happened to him,’ one of his other friends told Elenaangrily. ‘They’re the ones who are at fault. He never wanted to come here...’Elena was too upset to make any comment when Wayne asked for anotherloan, and he was moody and sharp-tempered with her, mocking her upbringingand taunting her with her naiveté and i