chapter 6

Maya's POV 

I froze, holding my breath inside my chest as Sami sat beside me.

I was careful not to relax or react beyond a deep breath, I didn't want even the smallest movement to return him to his shell.

His gaze shifted to our gently touching hands and then up, locking his eyes with mine. His dark eyes spoke of something unspoken. 

There was no hesitation, no fear in his gaze, only quiet resolve, as if he were challenging his own boundaries.

My own voice was a whisper, barely audible. "Do you want to go to your room now, Sami?"

He did not say a word or even react.  He just glanced back again at Lee, his expression unchanging, and then turned to make a move for the door.

I trailed quietly behind, my heart racing at the implications of what had just happened.  There was not yet a word said, but something had shifted. He was slowly opening up to me.

As we proceeded into the dark passageway, I stretched out, pausing for a moment before laying my hand gently on his shoulder to nudge him forward. He stiffened for a second but then he let me touch him, another small victory.

Sami's bedroom was neat as always, it was too neat for a child. The bed was made, the toys lined up on the shelves perfectly. It looked untouched, unused. I swallowed hard as I led him to his bed.

He slipped in without a sound, pulling the blankets up to his chin. His eyes never left mine, still wide, still questioning. He was waiting for something. I just didn't know what it was.

I gently settled myself onto the side of his bed. "Do you want me to stay until you sleep?"

I got exactly the same blank stare for my answer. He didn't look away, didn't close his eyes and therefore I decided to stay.

I settled in, lying back on the headboard, my fingers moving aimlessly across the coverlet. I hunted for something, anything that could soothe him, and I found myself humming before I could even consider what I was doing.

A lullaby. The one that I sang to Lee when she was irritable.

Sami looked shocked at first, his hands crumpling into the sheets. But then, slowly, he relaxed. His eyelashes flickered, his breathing evened out, and I watched as sleep crept over him.

I hadn't expected it to affect  me, but it did. Seated here, singing softly in the dark, watching over a boy who had known too much silence, too much loneliness, it was a moment I wasn't meant to be a part of, and yet somehow I was.

I shifted slightly, adjusting the blanket over Sami’s small frame as his breathing grew slower, more even. 

His tiny fingers clutched at the edge of the sheet, his lashes casting shadows over his cheeks in the dim glow of the nightlight.

I should leave. I kept repeating it to myself, over and over. I just wanted to stay there until he slept through, just long enough to make sure that he wouldn't wake up.again. 

The door was too far away, and my limbs were heavy, the warmth of the bed inviting me closer. Just for a minute, I said to myself, shifting a little so I wouldn't wake him.

Just a minute.

Sleep took me before I had even realized it.

A gentle tap on my arm woke me up.

I blinked at the morning light seeping into the room, my head foggy as I tried to find where I was. The bed under me, warmth alongside me….

I sat bolt upright. Sami was already awake, sitting up next to me. His black eyes gazed up at me, calm, unblinking.

"Mommy?"

I turned to see Lee standing in the doorway, a puzzled look on her face. She tilted her head. "What are you doing here?"

I opened my mouth, attempting to come up with something that wouldn't make her even more curious, but I wound up with the truth. "Sami needed me last night, and so I stayed to keep him company."

Her little nose scrunched up a bit. "All night?"

I glanced at Sami, who stood watching, impassive as ever. "Yes, baby. All night." I admitted with a sheepish smile. "I dozed off."

Lee thought about this, then smiled. "You must have been dead on your feet.  Come on, time for our morning routine!"

I blinked. "Morning routine? I didn't even remember that existed."

Lee nodded eagerly, taking my hand and pulling me off the bed. "You remember now. We have to brush our teeth, wash our faces, and get ready for the day. Let's go!"

She smiled reassuringly at Sami. "Come on, Sami. You too."

He stayed frozen for a moment. Fingers curled deep in the sleeves of his pajama top, face impassive. I remained frozen, expecting him to slink away.

Lee isn't at all like him, she is very outspoken and enunciates the statement of an adult woman trapped in a child's body while Sami is a shy quiet child. Would he oblige to play along with her?

But then, slowly, he really did get off the bed and followed along behind us, a couple of steps back.

Lee preceded us, humming to herself as she squeezed a blob of toothpaste onto her brush. I handed Sami his, watching as he hesitated before imitating Lee's actions. He brushed gently, slowly, his eyes flicking to Lee occasionally as if to check that he was doing it right.

My chest tightened at the sight of it. So little, so plain, and yet it looked gargantuan.

Later, I got them ready for the day. Lee chatted about how Sami now fit into our routine. He didn't respond, but he didn't look away from her as she spoke- I even saw a glint in his eyes, but we can't know for sure.

Once I was done with them and told them it was time to eat breakfast, Lee came running towards  the door and he followed again.

Progress.