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Longing for the Unreachable
Longing for the Unreachable
Author: Calm Abundance

Chapter 1

Author: Calm Abundance
"Honey, I picked up a cake from your favorite bakery. Come on over," Bernard Jackman said.

I laughed, threw myself into his arms, wrapped my arms around his neck, and kissed him.

"Look at you spoiling me with cake," I teased.

He gave me an indulgent smile, scooped me up, and set me gently on the couch.

As always, he was meticulous. He unpacked the cake, poured drinks, and placed everything onto the coffee table.

"Dig in, my little foodie. I'm going to shower."

I nodded and tasted the cake. The moment the first bite hit my tongue, I spit it back out. Confusion prickled through me as I glanced toward the bathroom.

The filling was mango.

I still remember the last time I ate a mango. It sent me to the emergency room with anaphylaxis.

That night, Bernard held my hand without letting go, his eyes reddened as he promised he'd never let mango near me again.

I told myself maybe he had no idea what was in it, but he was always so careful.

The thought stuck like a thorn in my chest.

I walked into the bedroom and, out of habit, straightened the clothes he had tossed on the bed.

Right then, his phone buzzed. A message popped up. "Bernie, the mango cake you took me to get today was so good. Love you, kisses!"

The contact name was "My little foodie".

I stared at the phone for a moment. Then, my fingers moved on their own, entering the passcode I'd known for years.

The next second, the screen unlocked. He had never even bothered to change it. He probably never thought I'd check his phone.

I opened his messages. My thread wasn't the only one pinned to the top. The other belonged to that little foodie.

I tapped it and scrolled all the way up. The visible history started a month ago. Anything older had been wiped.

The very first message struck me like a slap I never saw coming.

"Bernie, come keep me company tonight, okay?"

"Okay. I'll be there. I'll keep you satisfied. Don't tell me you can't take it!"

"You're such a tease. Maybe I should ignore you."

"My bad!"

I kept scrolling, breath caught in my throat, until I saw the line that knocked the air out of me.

"Bernie, be honest. Who's better in bed, me or your wife?"

"Come on. That old hag smells like mothballs. She doesn't hold a candle to you!"

Tears blurred my vision and dripped onto my hand. I wiped them away, steadied myself, and took out my phone to take photos of the messages.
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  • Longing for the Unreachable   Chapter 11

    Zach sighed. "Jenna, it looks like Bernard really loves you. He's been standing in the rain outside the building for a week."I shook my head and drew the curtains, shutting out the drizzle and Bernard's silhouette.So what if he loved me? It didn't erase what he did. If he'd cared, he wouldn't have crossed that line. It was far too late for apologies.…Later on, Wyatt called and said Bernard had come down with pneumonia after a fever, but he was refusing treatment."If you don't talk to him, he might not make it."So, I went to the hospital.Bernard lay weak on the hospital bed, muttering my name over and over.I sighed. "Bernard, we're over. You and I have nothing to do with each other anymore."His voice was hoarse but steady. "You're my only wife. Unless I'm dead, I won't agree to a divorce."I closed my eyes for a moment. When I opened them, I'd made up my mind. "If you want me to forgive you, then wait three years."He lit up, then faltered. "Why three years?""I'm g

  • Longing for the Unreachable   Chapter 10

    When I finally said yes, Bernard lifted me and spun me around, laughing through tears. "These six years were worth it," he said.Maybe he really did regret it. But he had no idea that what hollowed me out wasn't just Vera.I took a deep breath. "Bernard, sending Vera away doesn't change a thing. If you cheated once, there'll be a second time, and then a third time. When you joked to your friends that I was boring, did you ever think how much that would hurt me?"The spark of hope in his eyes died out, leaving only a dull gray emptiness."It was you who came after me. You swore you'd never betray me. And yet, you cheated and insulted me. Bernard, you're disgusting!"With that, I turned and walked away.This time, he didn't stop me....A few weeks later, I packed my bags for the program overseas.Just as I stepped out to grab a few last things, Wyatt texted me an address and said I had to come.I thought about ignoring it, but in the end, I sighed and drove to Riverton's lar

  • Longing for the Unreachable   Chapter 9

    After the fight, Bernard's eyes were puffed up, yet he flashed me a goofy grin."Jenna, see? I really like you! I can protect you!"At that moment, I finally let my guard down and hugged him tight."Who do you think you are? Do you have any idea who I am to Jenna?" Bernard's voice snapped me back to the present as he shot Zach a contemptuous look.I sighed and stepped between them. "Zach, he's my friend. We just had a misunderstanding. Thanks for the ride. You can head back now."Zach still looked worried. "Are you sure you're okay?""I'm fine. Thank you," I replied with a smile."Text me when you're inside," he said.I nodded.Zack got into his car and drove off.…Bernard asked coldly, "Who is he?""The new intern," I replied with a faint smile. "He's pretty handsome, right?"He took that as confirmation of whatever story he'd built in his head. His expression darkened as he snapped, "You can't just trust a guy like that! He's not serious about you! Don't let yourself ge

  • Longing for the Unreachable   Chapter 8

    I gave Bernard a cold smile. "Thank Vera for me. She showed me who you really are, and I walked away before you could ruin me completely!"He panicked. "It isn't like that. She staged everything..."Before he could finish, I pulled up the clip I'd recorded outside the private booth and hit play."Jenna might be pretty, but she's dead boring in bed! Vera, only you know how to satisfy me."Whatever color he had left drained from his face."Anything else you want to add, Mr. Jackman?" I asked coldly, then got in my car and drove off.I never bothered to remove the post about Vera from the confession page. That was the consequence of being the other woman and then taunting me on top of it.I had given her chances, but she kept provoking me.I wasn't the forgiving type, and I wasn't going to act like I was.…Within weeks, Vera withdrew from Riverton University and slunk back to her hometown.Bernard tried to see me more than once, always with the same script. He said he'd lost h

  • Longing for the Unreachable   Chapter 7

    I left without looking back once, but what I didn't expect was that Vera would actually come to confront me.On Friday after work, she blocked my path at the entrance of my office building.She was decked out in labels and carried a designer bag. Bernard had clearly been spending on her.She lifted her chin like she'd already won. "Bernard said you're boring in bed. He can't even stand being around you! You're older than me and nowhere near as pretty. What do you even have to compete with me?"Her flailing bravado almost made me laugh.She was there the night I ended things with Bernard, so what scene was she trying to put on now?When she saw a few passersby slow down, Vera straightened and raised her voice so everyone could hear. "You can't force a man to love you. Bernard doesn't want you. Why are you still clinging to him?"That did make me laugh. I was clinging to Bernard?It sounded more like Bernard had tried to cut her loose, and she panicked. Those photos she kept send

  • Longing for the Unreachable   Chapter 6

    Wyatt made a move to chase after Bernard, but I stopped him with a shake of my head.I knew Bernard too well. He was proud and stubborn, the kind of man who never backed down in front of a crowd.That was exactly why I chose tonight. Even if he hated it, he would have to agree to the breakup for the sake of his pride.To my surprise, it all went smoothly. He didn't try to hold on or cause a scene, and I even ripped off his mask in front of his friends.Wyatt kept persuading me, recounting how much Bernard had loved me over the years and urging me not to do something I might regret.I glanced around at the pairs in the booth and realized most of the women at their sides weren't wives, but mistresses.Maybe in their circle, cheating was normal, and their spouses just turned a blind eye. However, I never would do so.If Bernard's time was too precious to waste, then what about mine?I had given him my heart and the best years of my life. He was the one who broke his promise. Som

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