Riley
Very many full moons pass. Many winters pass.
Now I’m sixteen and bigger. I have learnt how to cook, how to embroider and stitch clothes, while working for Cassy’s Ma in her seamstress store. I own a few beds of flowers which I planted at the entrance of our house. I also learnt how to hammer in nails while assisting Pa in fixing our leaking roof.
Yes, Pa no longer drinks a lot. It has been reduced from every night to three nights every moon. This happened after a night he got so drunk that I had to go pick him up from the ground and take him home. One complaint led to another, and then we got so angry and began yelling at each other. These ended in us hugging each other tightly while both crying, with Pa repeating “I’m so sorry.”
So the drinking didn’t stop, but it reduced. He no longer forgets my name. Pa now goes to work on people’s farms to earn a few coins and food crops. He even talks to me.
One day, he said I was pretty just like my mom. I had gone to bed that night with a happy heart, and I saw an older version of me holding me in my dreams.
I have also learnt how to weave my own hair. It has gotten thicker and longer all the way to my back, so it’s easier to reach.
I sit in front of our broken mirror, weaving my hair into two pigtails.
I am at the first when Cassy runs into my one-roomed house, out of breath.
I jump in fright and go to her.
“You scared me. What is it?”
I have that bitter taste at the back of my throat, which I have whenever something bad is about to occur. But I wave that feeling away and intently stare at Cassy, waiting for her to say something.
She has her hand over her heart as she tries to breathe slower.
“B…base.” Cassy stutters.
“Alpha’s base? What about it?”
“Y…Your Pa.”
My heart comes straight up to my mouth.
I go grab her by the shoulders. “What about my Pa? Is he at the Alpha’s base?”
As she nods, the bitter taste multiplies.
“Fl…flogging.”
My goodness.
My eyes widen as I take a moment to process the situation.
Nobody goes to the Alpha’s Base without being summoned, as it is where our Alpha lives; a place for celebration, judgment, and punishment, but my Pa is there. So, I don’t think twice before I break into a run out of the house.
The joints on my legs hurt, my feet are burning, and there is something wet and sticky sliding down my left cheek. Sweat or maybe blood from when I had fallen and scratched my face on a cut root. Maybe. But I don’t care.
All I focus on as I run is the word ‘flogging’.
My own pa?
No.
Almost out of breath, I get to a few meters from Alpha’s base, then I hear a scream that tears at my heart. And if it was possible, I became a current and ran the fastest I could to the scene.
The Alpha’s base had a large house in it, a large open field with large tall trees surrounding the space like a barricade.
I burst through this barricade, and the sight that greets me stops me dead in my tracks. I stand frozen, blinking rapidly to be sure that the sweat hasn’t gotten into my eyes and blurred my sight.
I blink many times, but my father still has his hands tied around the bench where he lies flat on his belly. Pa’s face is scrunched up in pain as a hefty man with the Gamma tattoo on his right shoulder raises the whip, ready to strike again.
My legs refuse to move as I watch the whip go down to Pa’s back in a sharp stroke. His scream tears me out of my shock.
“Please!” I scream and, without gauging anyone’s reaction, I rush to where Pa is and gently throw myself on him.
I feel him wince and pull back. “So sorry, Pa.”
I hold his face in my hands. Pain is evident in his eyes. His bright blue eyes, which I got, are now dull and blurred, and more wrinkles have appeared on his face. His pale skin is indented by a huge bruise on both cheeks. He had been slapped.
“Pa?” my voice broke as I whispered.
“Move away.” A very authoritative voice rang out far behind me.
I turn.
There the Alpha stands, on a wooden platform, tall and strong, a rod in hand. Something about Alpha Stanley’s huge frame adds to the respect he commands and his authority. The sight of him reawakens the fright I thought was dead in me.
I crawl forward and bow to him, face to the ground.
“I…I greet you, Alpha.”
I stutter whenever I get nervous, but this has to do with fear, anger, and confusion. I had never envisioned sixteen-year-old me in the presence of the Alpha of our pack.
“Who?” his strong voice rang out again, making my already cold blood get colder.
“Ri…Riley.”
“Riley Green?”
Every werewolf in this territory is part of and solely loyal to the Green Creek Pack, so we all go by the name of the pack, ‘Green’.
“Yes, Alpha.”
“Who is that man to you?”
We are a pack of seventys and everybody knows everybody, but Alpha Stanley is not one to be bothered knowing all.
I take a glance at Pa and notice that the whipping has been put on hold.
“He is my father.”
Alpha nods.
“I was made aware that he is a mere Omega.”
The use of the word ‘mere’ made me swallow hard. And I say nothing.
“Are you aware of the pack’s rules?”
It is something Cassy always recited. She said her mom forced her to memorize it as it is very important, so I got inquisitive and learnt it too. It is a long row of Dos and Don’ts of the pack.
“Yes, Alpha.” I put my face down
“So you are aware of what the pay is for stealing?”
I don’t know if that is a statement or question, but…
Stealing?!
I turn sharply to stare at Pa. As our eyes meet, he immediately closes his, and with great effort, turns his head to the other side.
Definitely guilty.
My heart drops to its normal position with a heavy slam.
Avoiding Alpha’s gaze, I spoke. “We are so sorry. So so sorry.” Tears pilling and blocking my vision.
“No, that’s not it. The pay is not pleading and crying. Getting flogged till the person you stole from is tired and fed up of hearing you scream. That is the pay.”
The fact that I know that made the tears push forth more to break free. But no one would see me cry.
No one.
I remain quiet and look up at Alpha, pleading with my eyes.
“A lot of complaints have been getting to me about his behaviors, but all have been ignored, being that such is expected from a man who has lost his Mate. But it has been more than a decade, and there is no justification for stealing in my pack!”
I see no obvious way out of this, but if desperation were a person, it would be me.
Alpha raises his hand, and in his palm lies a set of shiny golden earrings.
“Your father stole this.”
Can my heart break any further? I had stolen that to give it to me. A werewolf only gets one mate in its lifetime. Pa’s was dead, because of me. And now he is getting whipped because of me. But I never ask for such things.
I bite my lip to hold the tears.
“He was told to work at the farm behind the house, but he went further to do more work. He went into the couple’s room and took this pretty thing. And with the rage they came in here with, I’m not sure they would tire of hearing screams anytime soon.” He pauses and turns his head.
I follow with my gaze and see the couple standing in a spot at the right-hand side of the platform where the Alpha stood.
Then I realize we are not alone.
A large group of people had gathered to behold the verdict. Some stand at my right, others at my left, all eyes on me. I had not noticed them in my troubled and desperate state.
“Or are you?” Alpha directs this to the couple.
The tall, lanky man is the first to speak. “I had to give Jerry the goldsmith twenty gold coins for that.”
There is a low murmur in the crowd at this confession.
The short, round woman’s low voice shuns the crowd. “He gave me that after we had our first pup. It one of my most cherished possessions. And he took it.” She points at Pa.
Meaning, no.
“See? So let’s get back to where we left off.” Alpha orders.
What? No.
“PLEASE,” I scream, making everyone and everything pause
I kneel up and rub my palms frantically together, facing the couple.
“Please, he is all I have. He stole that because I told him I wanted, no, needed pretty earrings as my Winter gift, as I had none. He took that because of me, so please have mercy. In fact I’ll do anything you want. Anything. Don’t just hurt my Pa.” I have a copper taste in my mouth. Blood. Drawn from how hard I bite my lip to hold back tears.
“Please,” I repeat.
Pa and I leave Alpha’s base with him severely injured and with me sad, as I know I will be resuming at that couple’s home tomorrow to become a live-in maid.
Without pay.
For how long?
I don’t know.
“Wh…what?” I widen my eyes at him.The ‘him’ is no other than Beta Stephen, the Beta of our pack.I had been so shocked when Stefani –the daughter of couple I work for- had rushed into the space I stay in, close to the kitchen to pull me out, while whispering hastily that Beta Stephen was here to see me.Me? Was the first thought that came to my mind.Why? Was the next.The last time I got to be in the presence of any of the pack’s authority was four years ago. That is, the incidence with Pa. One that scarred me by making me a help and making me fatherless, as Pa could not and did not survive the wounds he got from the flogging.I wasn’t enthusiastic to meet another authority. But Stefani’s enthusiasm was enough for two as she succeeded in dragging me outside the house.I came face to face with a huge back. And I froze.Frozen is how I still am even after he has told his reason for being here.“Do you have a problem hearing me, or is it with your understanding?” he said rudely.Strang
RILEY “What? Why?” Stefani questions for the both of us. We had gotten to the entrance of the Alpha’s base and an angry looking Gamma had told us to hold on. It seems he had been told to man the gate, judging from his stance and the dismissive voice he had used in telling us to wait. “I…I was told to come. The Beta told me to come.” I try staring into his eyes as I say this. Well, since I’ll soon be the Luna of this pack, might as well start brushing up my nerves and guts. “I am aware of that.” The sternness on his voice didn’t reduce as he says this, staring right back into my eyes. He wins the face off. I put my face down as my nerves fail me. “So?” Stefani asks, her hand never letting go of mine. “You still won’t let us through? She’s going to be your Luna soon.” The little rays left by the setting sun makes me see him look at me, right from my head to my toes, back to my head. Then a smirk appears on his face. “Are you aw…” Stefani begins, but pauses once she
RILEY“Come in.” I hear the voice behind the door say.Jude’s voice.I have been avoiding this all night and morning. I have been avoiding going to Jude’s room as what Stefani said keeps playing in my mind.We had gotten back from the Hunt hours ago and Jude dismissed the pack, while they still in their wolf form. I guess he didn’t want to see a bunch of naked people.While Jude retired to his room, I asked for the kitchen to go prepare just the grass cutter I had caught, as the antelope Jude caught was used as prize to a man that caught the largest number of animals. In there, I stayed for more hours.This was me stalling, as there was a maid who had collected the animal and offered to prepare the meat herself in the exact way Jude would like it. But I still sat there, with the excuse that I want to learn how Jude likes his meal done. I was able to learn that the help’s name is Theresa.After everything, taking the meal to his room, I had to take multiple deep breaths before knockin
RILEYRight here.On these pile of clothes, laid at a spot far from the fire place, is where I lay for many nights.I have been avoiding Jude like a plague. I feel like when I’ll finally come face to face with him, I might melt from either embarrassment or adoration, as, of course, those words he spoke to me the other night did nothing to the new feelings I have grown for him.I had still dreamt about him that night.In the dream, I saw us in our wolf form, running together in the wild. Then the next thing I saw was me heavy with child. I had woken up with a frown, which very quickly transformed into a bright smile.I want that with Jude.I want that with my husband.But that would never happen if I continue sleeping here.So I waited for him to summon me into his room, into his bed, into his arms.Well, waiting is what I’m still doing now, as he hasn’t still sent for me.He has become so scarce, that I have only seen him once since our wedding. And that once, me being me, I had hidde
RILEYTears begins to form in my eyes from the pain I feel.It is like a thousand termites have invaded my hair and are digging into my scalp.I hesitate and his grip gets tighter. At that moment, a sad whine leaves my mouth as I feel large chunks of hair being uprooted right from its root.“I said, kneel.” His voice comes out, hasher than earlier. Now, a low groan follows it.Slowly, without even realizing it, my knees begin to fold as the get closer to the ground.Slowly.Slowly.Then my knees hit the ground.Could be the tears blurring my vision, or the pain affecting my senses, but as I look up at Jude from down here, I see nothing but pure satisfaction on his face. As he has that smile line at the right side of his mouth stretched, and an odd glint in his eyes.Reading faces and expressions to ascertain how people feel is something that I started for survival, but later on, it just became something I am could at. I can realize how person feels just by noticing the faintest line o
RILEYDull rays from the sun greet my lids, but I refuse to open them.I refuse to wake up.From the faint chirping of birds and the cool breeze, I figure it is morning. But I am still in Jude’s arms, so I will not wake up. Until now, I have not realized how I crave to be held. And Jude’s large build complimenting my small frame gives all this the protective feature.Oh how I love to be held by him.Stefani would go scarlet if she hears about this. That girl is a romantist, if there is a word like that, and lives for all thing romantic.Jude steers, pulling me closer. I smile and go deeper into hi….“Who?” His husky morning voice enquires.And I go still.Getting no reply, Jude immediately withdraws his hands from around me, sits up and yanks the covers away from us both. I turn to him in shock. Then watch as his hard and alert eyes immediately go soft.“Oh. It’s you.” Realization us evident in his voice.“Hi.” I say shyly, remembering last night.“That was you last night?”The pride
RILEYSeveral pairs of eyes stay fixated on me. All holding different mood and questions as I step into the space and take that exact position where I stood to exchange vows with Jude.Exchange?Was that an exchange?Well, lets just call it an exchange.Roughly thirty women stand with frowns on their faces, barely hiding their shock on my arrival.“Hi everyone.” I say with my brightest smile, which I punctuate with a small, very unconscious wave.Uh oh.For a second, I forgot that I wasn’t introducing myself to a group of little pups, or to my age group.These are women.The lines on their faces speak of experiences, decades of existence. Their glares go straight to my brain and register that ‘hi’ is not a greeting for this breed.Hi?Riley this was not the plan.I recharge my confidence and decide to try again. There is no harm in that right?My shoulders go straighter, my head, I put higher, I tighten my chin, wiping all traces of smiles off my face. And hope I don’t look stupid.“I
RILEYTonight, I look tough without, but within, I flinch at the unrecognizable sound of my own voice.I hear a gasp from the crowd.Okay, the plan is respect, not fear. I remind myself.“Distractions throw me off. It’s something I avoid. I hope you understand and try not to interrupt me again.” My voice is softer this time.“I understand.” Jill replies with her eyes on the ground.“Good.” One conquered.I look towards her pair, Margaret, to read her reaction. But she immediately avoids my eyes.Definitely conquered.Oh the joy I feel.“The apology wouldn’t involve you all, it will be myself and few of you, maybe two or three. This number of people walking into your house would raise an alarm, even before their intentions of coming is made known.”No more objections. No more interruptions. “After this is achieved, we move to the next plan; making a Delivery committee for the pack.”I hear light murmurs as they turn to one another whispering their opinions, but they make sure I hear
RILEY“Don’t go there, Paul.” I stretch out to grab him.This, I have repeated for a hundred times now.How do those tiny creatures that only know how to cry and cling to their Ma, how do they get so stubborn and grow a will?“No. I want to go home.” He struggles to wiggle out of my grip.“We are almost done. Trust me, you will like the end part.” I coax.My calm words and soothing voice does nothing as he sits on the bare ground, exhausted from his struggle, and begins to cry. Heavy sobs with no sound.Pups and their drama.It has been a year.A whole year since Jude left and hasn’t returned.It has been difficult getting used to his absence and finding activities to keep me busy, with the aim of tiring myself out, so I’ll be so tired when I go to bed. Too tired to have those silly dreams of mine.It worked.I stopped dreaming about fighting strange creatures. And alongside this, I have a beautiful blooming garden at the backyard of the Base, I am almost a professional in the art of
RILEY Theresa did the bed wrong.So I ended up doing it myself.As I I did the beds, for the first time in a long time, I felt like myself, as I folded my hair in a messy bun at the top of my head, folded the arms of my brown ‘home’ dress, got on my knees and got to work, tilling the ground with a tiny shovel and my hands.With constant visit to the delivery house and my afternoons I spent practicing with Gerald, it had taken me two weeks to till, water, and manure that hard ground, to make it prepared for whatever I put into it.Two weeks seems like a long time, but there is something about doing what you love. There is an unseen kind of pleasure you derive from it. For me, coming back to this space, by evening every day, feels like being given a gold bottle of grape juice after spending a long day in a desert.That calming effect.The chirping of birds and cold air remind me of how early it is as I bend to dodge the branch of a tree that stands like fingers, blocking my path.My p
RILEYIt has been two months, three weeks since Jude left.It has been two months, one week since I figured that Jude had been cheating on me.Well, I don’t know if I am to regard that as cheating as there is no explicit feelings or even intimate physical touch between us. Well, apart from…that. That intercourse that leaves me hurting in all places.Is it supposed to hurt?After ruminating over it for about a week, it began to feel like he was cheating on her.With me.I felt bad.I still feel bad.But, with the way Beta Stephen said it like a fact that everybody knows, I didn’t let him see how his words affected me. I couldn’t let him see the slight way in which my hands shook from the shock, the way the pulse line in my neck throbbed faster, as I tried to digest the content of what he had being saying.It had taken me a lot of will power to ignore the burn in my eyes and walk out of that room quietly. My head was hurting, my eyes and throat were burning and all I wanted to do was g
RILEY Nothing, apart from that one night I had come to ask about Jude, has ever brought me to this side of the Base. And even now, as I walk towards Beta Stephen's room, like a sheep to the kill, my focus is too occupied to be bothered about my surrounding.Why am I asked to come to his room?Is this proper?Room. Isn't that supposed to be like something sacred and intimate?Questions. Questions.None answered, but I have this nagging feeling that I will not like the outcome of this. The feeling comes like bitter taste in my throat.I had told no one of the previous words Beta Stephen had spoken to me, as there is obviously no one to tell, and I had also tried hard not to think about it. He had spoken in ambiguous words, so what if I was reading the wrong meaning?And why would someone list over me?Me?Like have you seen me?Okay, I have gotten compliments- from Pa, Casey's ma and Stefani- that I am on the pretty side, but with this pile of long black hair, that sometimes feel impo
wake up with a start.There is sweat running down my back and I can as well feel goosebumps rising on my legs. I feel weak and it takes me a moment to realize where I am.The kitchen, of course.A ragged sigh leave my chest as I fold back into my resting place.I had vomited a lot today. There had been two very pregnant womene up for delivery and they had fallen into labour almost simultaneously. Being that the midwife could only focus her acre and attention on one, we had to split into group. Cleaning the woman’s sweat was my own duty, as they were fully aware of what a disaster it would be if I was involved with the bloody part of the business.Seeing the woman’s face had given me a whirlwind of emotions, as whike I try to be stong and focus on inanimate objects in the room, the woman wouldn’t just stop wailing.Moved by the ferocity of her screams, I had once barked at the midwife, which I was oaired with, to hasten up. My shout had made the room go sklent. Even the women kept qui
RILEY I have never been materialistic, or moved by materials, as I don’t remember owning or receiving gifts from anyone. I can also vividly remember that it was in a bid to get me a gift that my Pa ended up the way he ended up. So this overwhelming joy I feel as the pendant hang around my neck, is totally foreign to me. There is a permanent smile plastered on my face as I continuously look down to check if it’s real and not just a play out of my imagination. Beta Stephen is saying something to the crowd, I know. What he is saying, I don’t know. Is this how everybody feels on Winter nights? No wonder the happiness written all over their faces, both Young and old, as they try tone it down and concentrate on listening to Beta Stephen. I don’t blame them. I am not listening too. After getting the information from Gerald that this beautiful thing hanging around my neck is my Winter gift from Jude, my husband, I had grabbed the box, and read a deeper meaning of love and consideratio
RILEYMy fear continues to manifest.Three days turned into a week, with no word or sight of the love of my life.Slowly, the days have blended into one week. And one week into two.Two weeks of my boredom intensifying and leaving me with the most terrible imaginations of what could have befallen Jude. As often as it comes, I try to cleanse it with positive thoughts.But the bad thoughts won’t just go away.It has someway gotten into my dreams, so that I no longer see Jude and I in rosy, sunshine filled places, where the sun shone very bright and the wind blew very low. No. I now see myself in tight rubber jumpsuits, as a warrior. Always the same costume. And my mission in those dreams are always the same.There is no one giving me this mission, but I see myself going to rescue Jude from all manner of dangerous places.From a fire filled bottomless pit, inhabited by big scary looking dragons. From dark dry desert, where I have to combat with huge dinosaurs that had large noses. From
RILEYEver heard of the saying that what you fear, taunts you. And as it taunts you, from just your imagination, slowly, without you even realizing it, you breathe life into that fear and it becomes reality.I know this is not how it’s said, but my brain settles with understanding it this way.This happens to me.My fears have become reality.One day passed. Understandable .Two days. I’m still waiting.Now three whole days.And no sign of my husband. I have, earnestly waited for his return. Prayed that he is safe. Hoped that he has all thing under control. Wished to be in his arms every night.These, I have been doing for two full weeks.It’s been three whole days and the only place I am given the liberty to see my husband in in my dreams. In my very lengthy dreams, as all I do these days is wait and sleep.In there, he is more handsome, calmer, speak to me softly, holds me tenderly, looks into my eyes regularly and kisses me very often, in a world where only two of us exist.But in
RILEYI force a smile, trying to dispose every feeling of awkwardness I had felt when I marched into the room. Okay. The messenger had called it a meeting, but I had thought, maybe, it will be just an official kind of discussion between myself and my husband, while we share breakfast.I was wrong.The room is packed with about twenty hefty Men, the Beta and the Alpha himself. I see no sign of anyone in the same gender as me. So, it is very normal to feel awkward while stepping into such a space.But…I am Luna.So I throw my head higher while stiffening my shoulders as I walk majestically, without hurry, into the space.As I walk, my eyes scan the room. The last time I came in here, I had been so excited about having breakfast with Jude, that ignored my surroundings and paid very little attention to the glaring details of the room. There are about twenty five rows of benches occupying the far left of the room. Or should I say, hall? Just like in the space outside the Base, the Alpha