4

CHAPTER 4

RUBY'S POV

Morning came faster than I expected. 

Or maybe it was because I wasn't able to sleep early enough at night due to the many thoughts storming up in my head. 

Once my alarm rang, I was up and made my way to the kitchen because I was desperate for a distraction to get my mind off the panic that was brewing beneath my calm exterior, and making Sally breakfast was a perfect distraction.

Dax said he was going to return to the club and I didn't know what to make of it. I still wanted my revenge but not that way, I wanted it done in a way that he wouldn't see me coming so he would never be able to recover from the impact of whatever I was going to do to him. But now that he was probably about to be a regular at where I worked, that spelled doom for me. 

"What are you making for breakfast?" Sally's voice filtered through my thoughts and I flinched, making the bowl of pancake batter I had in my hand fall. I stood motionless as I watched the content spill on the floor and I sighed before running my fingers through my hair.

"You scared me, Sally. Don't creep on me like that again" I scolded my daughter and she pouted.

"I'm sorry mum. I thought you heard me come into the kitchen" she explained while apologizing and I suddenly felt bad about scolding her. It wasn't her fault that I was so far up my head and didn't hear her join me. I was distracted so she did nothing wrong.

"Come over here sweetie. Mum is sorry and you did nothing wrong okay?" I tried to make her feel better and a smile broke free on her lips three seconds later which made me feel better.

Moving away from the pancake mess, she ran into my arms and I caught her before spinning her in the air as her soft giggles filled the kitchen.

I felt my mood lighten up immediately as I joined her in laughing while peppering kisses all over her face and soon, Clarissa joined us. 

"I could hear you guys in my sleep", she said sleepily as she grabbed a mug and began to make coffee for both of us.

"You have a business to run so it's a good thing we woke you up then", I told her and she sneered at me before returning to making coffee. That made me chuckle as I set Sally back on her feet then I knelt before her and patted her on the head.

"You should get ready for school. Breakfast will be ready when you're done" I told her and she nodded her head before scurrying off to her room to get herself ready for school so it was just me and Clarissa left in the kitchen.

Releasing another exasperated sigh, I went to get a bowl of water and a piece of rag to clean the mess I made.

"Are you sure you're okay, Ruby? You got scared and spilled a bowl of pancake mix just because Sally asked what was for breakfast" Clarissa suddenly hit me with the question I'd been expecting but dreaded and I froze in the middle of wiping off the last batter stain on the floor. 

I knew she was awake before Sally came into the kitchen and she heard everything. I knew she only cared but I didn't want to burden her with my problem when she was trying to grow a business. 

That wouldn't be fair to her. So I continued to clean while acting clueless.

"Nope, I'm completely fine. Just got scared that's all"

"I don't believe you, Ruby" she fired at me immediately and I looked up at her.

She took a sip from her coffee before raising an eyebrow at me and I rolled my eyes while turning around to discard the now milky waste of water I used to clean the pancake batter down the sink.

"I don't want to talk about it" I made it clear to her immediately while rinsing my hands then I turned around to face her and she handed me my mug of coffee like I didn't just tell her off.

"I know, Ruby. Do you think I don't know you? You keep things to yourself until you feel like letting them out but I'm used to it already because I'm your best friend and I love you regardless" she told me and her words gnawed at my guilt while the mug burnt my hands but it felt comforting as I swallowed the lump in my throat. She didn't have to describe me like that… even though it was true.

"I'm sorry Clarissa, I'm just not ready to…"

"Tell me until you have the whole situation under control. I know and I won't push you to tell me until you want to. As I said before, I'm used to it and I understand" She finished my words for me and I forced a smile on my face. I couldn't wish for another best friend when I had her.

"Thanks, Clarissa and I love you," I told her and she waved me off before making her way over to one of the kitchen stools.

"You'd better make Sally's breakfast before she's done. You promised her it would be ready when she returns" she reminded me and I palmed my face because I forgot what I promised Sally.

Quickly, I got a bowl and began to mix another pancake batter for breakfast. Then I remembered I had something to give to Clarissa but she was gone by the time I turned around to let her know so I went on with my chore and five minutes later, I was done and Sally was back in the kitchen too. Together in silence, we ate our breakfast and soon, Clarissa joined us too.

"I have something for you Clarissa, I will give it to you when we're done with this," I told her while we washed the dishes after breakfast and she grinned at me while rinsing a bowl.

"What is it? You know I hate it when there is a surprise" she asked me impatiently and I couldn't hold the smile on my face back.

"You'll see. Now, wash the dishes because I'm not telling" I replied, earning a huff from her before we continued in a comfortable silence.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang and we both turned toward the living room at the same time. I couldn't help but wonder who it could be so early in the morning because I wasn't expecting any delivery. I shared a look with Clarissa who looked at me questioningly and I shrugged in reply.

Quickly, we both rinsed our hands and rushed to stop Sally who was waiting for the school bus in the living room from getting the door, but we were too late. 

She had the door open already and I saw the silhouette of a huge figure reflecting on the wall… I could tell it was a man immediately and I rushed to get her away from whoever it was at the door.

"Mum, there's a man by the door," she said to me just as I joined her by the door and pulled her back to stand behind me.

Then I looked up to see who it was by the door so early and I felt all the blood drain from my face when I saw it was Dax… again.

For eight years, he was like a ghost in my memory, like a phase that felt like it never even happened to me and made me wonder if I conjured it all up in my head but seeing Sally every day reminded me that I wasn't crazy and what happened with Dax was real.

Now, it seemed like he was suddenly everywhere. At Michael's funeral, the nightclub, and now on my porch in front of my house. It felt like he was stalking me but I knew Dax would never have the time to do that over me. He was the same person who broke up with me and called me a fake eight years ago so I certainly wouldn't interest him that much. 

I was about to confront him about coming to my house when Sally's bus arrived and the driver honked to call her over.

"There's my bus. Bye" …

She said cheerfully with a wave, completely unaware of the turmoil slowly unfolding in the air, and walked to the bus. We all stayed silent, my eyes on her as she got into the bus, Dax's eyes on me, and Clarissa standing closely behind me to let me know she was there in case I needed support.

Then the bus left and it was just the three of us standing by the door to my house. My heart was racing way too fast for me to be able to breathe but I was still standing so it was a relief. Except I didn't know what Dax was here to say and he saw Sally, he heard her call me mum too and he was going to piece it all together to figure it out soon. 

Lord! I couldn't let the man who abandoned me know he had a child with me. What if he did it again after I let him into Sally's life? I was never going to forgive myself because I knew she would never recover from his absence. She was just too sweet to deserve that.

"What just happened, Ruby? That child just called you mum, who is she and why did she call you that?" He asked all the questions at once and I could hear the little tremor in his voice. He was shocked and was trying to hide it but I knew him well. 

I spent a lot of my time observing everything he did just to understand him more when we dated because he said only a few words to me. He was almost a closed-off book, unreadable, except for when he acted so loving toward me once in a while. 

His personality was so confusing and I wondered if he ever loved me. That must be why it was so easy for him to let me go those years ago.

"What are you doing here Dax? What do you want with me?" I asked him all the questions that had been on the tip of my tongue since I saw him at my door and he gave me a puzzled look.

“Are you now married? Is that your daughter, Ruby?” He asked me as his eyebrows knitted in confusion in the middle of his forehead and I looked away from him. I didn't know what to say but I also didn't want him to know Sally was my daughter.

So I did the only good idea that came to mind at that moment.

“I'm not married and she's Clarissa’s daughter,” I told him and I felt Clarissa freeze behind me. I only hoped she would play along and forgive me for using her so suddenly. It was the only way to protect Sally from Dax.