Chapter 5

ROSE

Opening my eyes and seeing him sitting right next to me made my heart ache badly. You know that feeling when something feels like it is suffocating you? That was how I felt. I thought he had left before I fell asleep, and realizing I had been unconscious for a whole week, I did not know what to say. I had thought it had only been a few hours, but still, I was glad to see him. My stomach filled with a sweet excitement, like a child being handed candy.

He was wearing a sleeveless shirt, his broad shoulders completely exposed. I really wanted to look away, but my eyes had other plans. They refused to cooperate and instead slowly scanned his body. He had changed. He was broader, stronger, and it made me almost drool. I thought I had gotten over him. I hissed and looked away, my eyes moving to the little soul beside him.

Annie was sleeping soundly on his chest. I was relieved that I had been the one hit instead. I did not even want to think about what would have happened if Annie had been the one hit. I just knew there was no way I would have forgiven myself. Or Maya. Or Steve. Annie's little arms were wrapped tightly around Ryder. She had never held Steve like that. Her father. It hurt even more realizing that I had given my daughter the worst father anyone could ever pray for.

I almost choked when Ryder asked if he was her father. He could not be. How could he? Not after everything that happened. Besides, we had never gone that far. People did not get pregnant from touching, hugging, or kissing.

My mind went back to years ago. Ryder had been so sweet. Everything I had ever wanted. But sometimes, situations are bigger than us. I had just buried both my parents in the most heartbreaking way possible, and then my best friend came to tell me Ryder was fucking someone else. His father was already threatening me. I could not bear any of it. I had to leave for my own sanity and safety. But after what that same best friend had done to me now, I could not even tell if she had lied back then.

I did not know what was going through Ryder's mind after I told him Annie was not his. He simply told me the hospital bills had already been taken care of and wished me well in my marriage. As much as I wanted to refuse his help, I could not bring myself to. I did not have enough money on me to keep Annie and me fed for even a few days. As for the marriage, I figured there was no point telling him. I was not ready to share that part of my life with him.

After he left, I did not see any reason to spend another second in the hospital. What if the bill increased? I would be stranded there because, from the way Ryder left, it was obvious he was not coming back. It hurt, but I was grateful anyway. I took Annie and our bag, then got on a bike. The only place I could go was my parents' house. It was vacant. Since Mum and Dad died, I had not been back here. Fresh tears slipped down my cheeks, and Annie slept the whole way.

I did a little cleaning and laid Annie in my old room before going into the sitting room. This was going to be our home now. At least until I figured out what to do with my life. Annie had to get back to school here. I was not going to make her suffer because of my decisions. Get a job. Be a good mother to my child. That is it. No distractions whatsoever. Just focus on my daughter. I tried to reassure myself as I took a long breath.

Then it came. A sharp flash of lightning lit up the room through the window, followed by the sound of a motorcycle. Before I could even react, the door burst open. Ryder stood at the entrance.

"Why did you leave?"

His voice was demanding. I tried to think of what to say. It was complicated. I could not just start telling him everything. Before I could say anything, his lips covered mine. I felt the faint smell of alcohol on his breath, and strangely enough, it felt good. His lips were familiar. Too familiar. A tiny voice inside my head reminded me of everything that had made me leave, and I tried to pull away.

"Rose, please."

His voice was low and pleading. Something about it made my resolve weaken. He kissed me like his life depended on it. I could not tell if he had become better at kissing or if it was simply because I had been starved of affection for months. Steve had not touched me or made me feel like a woman for the past eight months. He always had one excuse or another, and eventually, I stopped bothering. He never initiated anything either. He acted like someone who was relieved not to have to touch me anymore. He was getting everything he wanted from my best friend.

The thought made me angry, and somehow, it made me pull Ryder closer. I grabbed his hair and held him against me. Nothing was supposed to matter. Nothing at all. At least, that was what the tiny voice in my head kept telling me. For a few moments, I forgot my surroundings. I forgot everything that had happened. I forgot Steve. I forgot Maya. I forgot why I had left North Oak. All I could feel was Ryder, and the terrifying truth was that whatever I had felt for him years ago was not completely gone. Maybe I still loved him. I did not know. I did not want to know.

A ringing phone suddenly jolted me back to reality. Annie. I remembered she was sleeping in the other room and quickly pulled away. Ryder hissed and ran a hand through his hair before turning his gaze toward the other side of the room. I reached for the phone, and then I saw the caller. Steve.

"What does he want?"

My hand tightened around the phone.

"He still had the nerve to call me after cheating on me?"

I did not realize I had said it aloud until a firm hand took the phone from me. I instantly knew Ryder had heard everything. It made me feel as though my heart was about to jump out.