Chapter 8

Serin closed the door and leaned on the wall outside. She has been enduring that terrifying feeling for the sake of Jeremy.

She no longer wants him to feel sorry and distressed. All she has ever wanted is to help him, so he can finally go back to how he used to be. 

She closed her eyes, tears overflowing. Her palms have cuts from pressing hard on the shattered things when she landed on the floor earlier. But her right shoulder is so painful that she could not make even a single step.

Her left hand held on her right shoulder. Leaning against the wall, she is slowly sliding down her back.

Enduring this painful feeling instantly reminded her of the pain she felt when Jeremy held on her shoulders on the day they met for the first time. It's the same exact agonizing pain.

But something feels wrong as she is trying to suppress the pain. Her wound is bleeding again. 

She immediately stood up, enduring the aching sensation just to go to her room which is on the same floor.

The door suddenly opened.

This stopped Serin from making her first step. To her surprise, a hand gently held her arm. Jeremy took his courage and faced her.

No more wasted chance to turn his inevitable affection to words.

"Are you okay?"

------------

Wounds on her palms and the deep cut on her right shoulder are nothing compared with the pain that Jeremy has been enduring for so long. 

Serin could really feel his agony just by looking at him. Tough from the outside but he is almost crushing inside.

Serin could not take her eyes off the guy sitting so close in front of her. Jeremy is treating the bruises on her palms. His gentleness is a dream-like scenario to Serin. She has to admit that this moment with him is making her wish to stop the time.

"I will just do it." Serin spoke in haste and rose up.

She immediately opened the door and asked Jeremy to leave her in the room.

The guy stood up.

Bothered, desolate, exhausted, apologetic. Serin could not understand why she could see those unexpressed emotions in Jeremy's eyes. They speak of endless misery. 

"That must be painful." Jeremy's eyes are looking at Serin's right shoulder.

Her hand quickly covered it. "Not really, sir."

The day Jeremy let her go, he promised that he would not think about Serin anymore. But whenever he would close his eyes, he could not stop himself from diving into his thoughts on Serin.

And what he feels like backstabbing him is his own desire to remember the moment he thought he was kissing Serin at Campbell Park, under the beautiful starry night sky. 

"Sir??" Serin broke the growing silence, wanting to make Jeremy come back to his senses because obviously, he's lost in his deep thoughts again. 

Just like now, with his stray thoughts, Serin gets a lot more motivated to help Dave get better.

She is sure that Dave is one of the reasons why Jeremy always looks troubled and distressed. That tiring responsibility taking care of his older brother has been putting a heavy weight on his shoulders.

"I won't leave this house until I see Sir Dave get better. Yenny told me that it is really hard at first but once I get his trust, it won't be that difficult anymore. Please trust me, Sir Jeremy." Her eyes evoked genuine eagerness.

Jeremy remained silent. No words came out from him but his eyes could tell something. He is still looking at Serin's right shoulder.

"Though I don't know how I got this wound, I feel like it's been here for so long. Sir Dave did not cause this. So please, don't feel sorry. I am really okay." Serin said to snatch Jeremy's guilt.

She walked to where Jeremy is standing and boldly faced him. "Sir?? I told you I am okay. This is nothing."

It is too late for him to step back. Face to face, Jeremy met eyes with Serin once again.

One, two, three, four, five seconds. Jeremy waited and counted another second. No more flashing scenarios in her eyes, but his own reflection.

With eagerness, Jeremy tried to look into her eyes again, deeply. But all he can see are Serin's mysteriously beautiful eyes.

"Serin.."

A lingering intimacy in silence.

"Will you go out with me.. tonight?"

-------------

A dreamy overlooking view before her eyes. The vast city is dazzling in colorful lights. She is standing on the fenced cliff, immersed in the beauty of the deep night.

Beside her is Jeremy.

"This is where I found you. That concrete road behind us, that rainy night. It has been four months now but everything is still clear."

The stunning view suddenly painted a gray spirit. Jeremy's voice, though it sounded sturdy, is filled with unexpressed sadness and despair.

"It has been hard for you. I am really sorry." The only words Serin could utter.

She has always wanted to be Jeremy's comfort but she is totally clueless.

"The name you called me that night, your sketch of my face and.." He stopped. 

Serin looked at him. Jeremy's miserable presence is more than Dave's. For some reason, she could feel it.

"Sir, I think we need to go back to--"

"Your eyes.." Jeremy cut her in.

He threw his hesitation and faced Serin.

She has no idea what has been running through his mind. But strangely, the depth of Jeremy's pain, loneliness and misery is deeply resonating with her.

"You have mysterious eyes, Serin." Jeremy told her.

-----------

Serin held Jeremy by his arms. "Sir, please listen to me. You need some help. You should not ignore your condition. You must consult a psych--"

"I'm mentally sick. Is that what you want to say?" Jeremy spoke with disappointment. 

"There's nothing wrong with that, sir. All of us go through rough times. It's just that sometimes we can't avoid feeling seriously troubled, anxious, distressed and hopeless. So, we must seek help."

"After crossing paths with you, I keep encountering absurd things and those have been making me insane.. I saw myself, a girl, you, odd scenarios in your eyes.. Believe me, Serin.." Jeremy's desperation is getting more evident. 

Serin can't help but feel the world has fallen on Jeremy. He looks devastatingly desperate.

"Sir Jeremy.. I understand why you're like this. Your mom's death, Sir Dave's condition, it's been depressing and agonizing. I understand where you're coming from. Don't worry, sir.. Everything will be--"

"You don't understand me!! It's not about my mom and Dave!! This is all about you!!!" Jeremy's utter loss of hope pushed him to explode.

Serin took her hands off Jeremy's arms. She stepped back, trying to avoid Jeremy's fired up eyes.

Jeremy closed his eyes. He is trying to stop his frustration to eat him up. He promised that he would be nice and gentle to Serin after crossing paths with her again. 

Serin leaned her back against the tree behind her. It is no longer fear that she feels towards him, but pity. 

In her eyes, Jeremy is like a lost soul who keeps wandering in haze. Hopeless, comfortless. Her heart is breaking for him.

Jeremy's eyes are still closed. 

Immersed in his willingness to calm himself, a scenario once he saw in Serin's eyes before suddenly reappeared in his mind.

Dark road, heavy rain. He is crying on his knees. Fireworks. Blood on his hands.

That road looks very familiar, he thought. 

In a rush, Jeremy opened his eyes. He is right! That road once he saw in a flashing scenario in Serin's eyes is this completely dark and empty road. Desf Road. 

------------

"J..Jeremy." Serin uttered.

Serin's voice snapped him out of his chaotic mind.

Confused, Jeremy walked to where she is. He feels something strange. Serin called him Jeremy only and not with 'sir'

When Jeremy stood right in front of her, she saw Jeremy's face and in an instant, her memory came back!

She longingly touched Jeremy's face. Tears are flowing from her eyes. "H..Heron Arth? Y..You're a..alive??"

Jeremy is at a loss for words, hearing Heron Arth, the name he hated the most!

But, before Serin can continue what she is saying, Jeremy kissed her.

Moments with him in the past are rushing in. Those beautiful and painful moments.

Serin's tears are dripping from her longing eyes while Jeremy is kissing her.

But suddenly, Jeremy feels something strange. It is a familiar feeling he felt on his hand the night she saw Serin.

He can't be wrong because he knows that terrifying feeling.

To his surprise, Serin powerlessly clung on to him, wrapping her arms around Jeremy's shoulders.

She spoke in great pain. "S..Someone.. s..stabbed me.."

Jeremy slowly raised his hand, shaking. 

There's blood on his hand! And this is from Serin's right waist. 

"Serin!!!!" Jeremy screamed his shattered heart. 

Before he could carry her to his car, Serin uttered, "Jeremy.. I love you."

The moment she painfully expressed her feelings for Jeremy, fireworks in the vast dark sky suddenly displayed, flashing in striking colors.

Heavy rain poured. Serin closed her eyes, dripping big tears.

But then, she instantly disappeared!

The night view is filled with fireworks while the heavy clouds are grieving.

"Noooo!!!!!" Jeremy screamed.

The rain keeps pouring. He closed his eyes.

He is like a lost child. "Serin!!!!!"

Jeremy is left crying on his knees, blood on his hands. The pain is tearing him into pieces. His deafening cries are reflecting great agonizing sorrow.

His eyes are still closed.

Suddenly, a familiar scenario flashed through his mind. Tears keep rushing as he gets strayed to that absurd memory.

Dark road, heavy rain. He could see himself crying on his knees. Fireworks. Blood on his hands.

He quickly opened his eyes. A terrifying shock crawled on his body.

'This can't be real!' He is shaking his head, quivering. 

The rain stopped.

Jeremy is staring blankly to where Serin disappeared. He isn't hallucinating. It is not a bad dream.

Those odd scenarios Jeremy has already seen in her eyes just happened.. here on this road. 

It is all real because he just experienced it!