Locked away in my room, I was curled into a ball as I drowned in self pity.
My life was a mess, 22 years of age and I've yet to find my mate.
Everyone around my age has found theirs.
I rarely leave my room, only for important purposes.
With how weak my wolf is, I fear others will think I'm an omega, however both my parents are Beta so it's unlikely that I'd be one.
My wolf and I were just in a deep state of depression.
Consumed by our own guilt
Six years ago when I first received my wolf, something occurred that changed my life forever.
“Claire, open up, we need to talk,“
It was my mother.
Dragging myself up off the floor, I opened the room door so she could enter.
“Your father is home. He’s already seated at the dining table,“
“I’m not hungry” I lied. It’s just that I’d prefer to eat alone
“let’s have dinner as a family for once, and besides, there’s something we need to discuss with you,“
She shook her head not taking my word for it.
I sigh and follow her down to the kitchen. I was curious as to what they wanted to discuss.
her wavy black hair swayed behind her as she walked, It reached a little under her bum.
My mom and I looked almost identical from our ice cold light blue eyes, down to certain mannerisms.
we both avoid eye contact when lying and toss our hair when upset
Dad was seated around the table, he smiles warmly at me
I washed my hands and took a seat beside him
“Evening Father"
I greeted him
“Good Evening, my favourite daughter,“
“I'm your only child,“
He was trying to make a Joke, I knew that but depression has gotten the best of me.
“Let's get right to it then, shall we?.with the qualifications you've acquired during your time the the nursing school and our packs recent attack, there's so no reason you should be sitting at home feeling sorry for yourself, Ella is never coming back and maybe if you actually left the house more often, you'd find your mate "
“Theo,“ mom says, holding his arm
“you’re making her cry“
But he shook his head
“She's my daughter and I love her, which is why I have to tell her the truth even if it’s hard to hear. Look at max?, he's mate-less too and we don't see him doing what Claire's doing"
I flinch at the mention of Max's name, my tormenter. The guy was a real piece of work which always puzzled me, since his dad, our Alpha, was the opposite of that. The man was a loving guy who cared deeply for his family and his pack.
Mom sighs and reaches for my hand over the table
“He’s right honey, I know she was your friend but we all know Ella she wouldn’t want you being like this. Will you go to the pack tomorrow?”
They're right, there's no good in locking myself away, it won't bring me healing and it sure as hell won't help me find my mate.
“yes, I will go tomorrow "
“That’s my girl,” father says proudly, he ruffles my hair and I ruffled his too
“Dad, you’re getting old” His once light brown hair, is now showing streaks of grey
”He is“
Mom laughs
”You weren't saying that last night…,“
Dinner became awkward after that, I quietly slipped away to my room.
Father had scheduled a meeting with the Alpha that's supposed to take place tomorrow
I undressed myself, the cool air making contact with my skin. I shivered
Turning the tab on, I waited for the shower to heat up, before entering.
My hair hasn't been washed in 2 weeks so I washed it then took a long shower.
The hot water scorched my skin raw, but that's how I like it.
All the mirrors were foggy due to the heat so I had to wipe them off then process them to get dressed.
I ditched the Pjs I'd been wearing since the other day and wore fresh one's
My energy was drained thinking about tomorrow, there's one person in particular I would rather not see, however, I need to look as presentable as possible for tomorrow
After a while of searching for something to wear, I found something that I think would work
I picked out a simple grey skirt, a pink top that I think will go well with it, pink heels, and some jewellery that’s more on the simple side. I like the simple but cute look.
The jewellery that I chose was a bracelet, anklet, necklace and earring. All in silver since that will blend with the grey and pink outfit more than gold would.
I placed my outfit down on the chair in the corner of my room, my shoes underneath it and my jewellery box on the seat.
I looked at my outfit, but I wasn’t pleased. Something’s missing. Oh, I didn’t have a bag.
Rushing to my clothes, I took out a grey handbag. I hung it on the shoulder of the chair and stepped back to observe it.
Perfect!
The pink didn't give off Barbie vibes at all, everything looked professional
Alpha wouldn't be pleased if I showed up looking like a Barbie doll and Max would surely make fun of me.
Next I set my alarm clock for 7: 30 am, the meeting with Alpha is 11 am.
“That’s it” I smile to myself. I’m all set for tomorrow.
Let's just hope I don't change my mind
At the sound of my alarm clock I rose from my sleep and started getting ready for my interview. 8:30 Am and I was fully dressed ”Claire, are you ready?" Dad could be heard from the other side of my room door.I grabbed my phone and handbag before opening the door”How do I look?“ I asked giving him a little twirl.”you look great sweetie pie,“He sniffs”Daddy, what's wrong?“”Oh, n nothing“ he wipes his eyes”I'm just so proud of you for taking the first step in moving on,“This made me shed a few tears of my own, life must have been hard for my parents, seeing their daughter consumed in pain, not knowing how to help. I hug him”Thanks for telling me what I needed to hear,“What's done is done, no one can bring her back.”Can I join?“Mom asked to join, and we extended our arms so she could. We hugged for a minute after which dad I left.***It was still early when we arrived at the pack, I breathed in the fresh air, while dad left to tend to his Beta duties With an hour and m
When I arrived home, mom was in the kitchen, I tried to show her the nursing uniform doctor Lynch had given to but, however, she was more interested in the fact that Max's scent was alll over me. It all made sense why I received so many weird looks. A shower did the job, his dominating scent was no longer on me, instead I smelt of fresh magnolia. Mom was still in the kitchen, when I was out the shower, humming away to a tune while she made dinner.I slipped away to my regular escape, a nearby river. Whenever I wasn't locked away in my room, I'd come here. The wind against my skin felt pleasing as I inhaled the fresh air, my hair flowing in different directions.As I closed my eyes and listend the quiet sound of the river, a feeling of contempt washed over me.I sat down and took my shoe off, placing my feet into the water. It relaxed me.The aura of this place is what drew me to It, ever since I was a little girl. I would force dad to take me swimming every weekend until it bec
Flashback *** 6 years ago “Ella, stop!” I yell at my best friend, who keeps taunting me. We were outside in the woods having a camp out. “Oh, come on, we used to play chase all the time” “Yes, but not right now. Let’s, go roast some marshmallows or go inside the tent” She brushes me off and runs. “Catch me if you can“ I could feel my wolf coming forward as she taunted me. My 16th birthday was the month prior , I shifted for the first time and ever since, I haven’t been able to control my wolf. Catch me” She called out, not aware of the inner struggle I was facing. Eventually, I lost the battle with my wolf and I charged after her, shifting into my wolf in mid air. The sound of a scared heartbeat, the quick breathing of the victim as it's being chased, the sound of the feet as it thuds the ground in hurried movements felt heavenly to my wolf. “Claire!!” Ella screams my name, as she looks behind her, my Wolf closing in on her. “Help!, somebody help me, please, Claire ”
I panted, my face and neck covered in sweat.When has shopping gotten so difficult?.I'm calling my father to come get me." Dad, I need you to come get "I breathed out once he answered the call." Why do you sound as if you're dying "He chuckles"That's because I am"" I can see that "He says, this time he sounded as if he was close to me and no longer as though he was over the phone.&nbs
The morning felt lovely, it was 8 am and the sun was making its way out. I took a whiff of the sweet aroma that was the Air.Spring was indeed a wonderful season. Humming to myself, I went to the canteen and ordered some coffee. I got french vanilla since that will be just enough to get me started for the day. Had I been tried I would have gone for something stronger, black coffee perhaps. With the coffee in my hand, I turned to leave only to be startled by Max's voice. I didn't see or sensed him, I was too focused on getting to work. The hot coffee spilled all over me. "I saw you with that mutt last night""What mutt are you talking about Max?, I have to get to work "I asked frustrated, I've just been burnt because of him."The guy who you were sitting with outside the party Saturday night "" Who, Beck?"" If that's what it's called ".How dare him!" Let's get one thing straight Max, He's not an it and is there a problem?"He moved closer to me, but I didn't step back, I
“Welcome everyone, I’m Miss Seles here to bring to you, Emotional healing.Our body’s response to trauma is by shutting down, numbing all the negative feelings until it becomes too much to handle, which is why we often fall into depression. It is important to note that the symptoms and causes might vary, however, for the sake of our mission here today. We’ll be focusing on the most common symptoms and causes that I’ve noticed within this group upon reading the application letters.Symptoms:Self hate Dislocation Resentfulness Suicidal thoughts Obsessive behaviour Binge eating Anxiety Causes:Childhood traumaPressure (peers, family members, sexual partner, work)Fear Low self esteem Remember, as overcomers of depression, we’re here to PHG. Prevent, heal, and grow from depression. Not to shame others. With that being said, let’s start with Shantel. The girl, whose name was called, stood up. Miss Seles gave her an encouraging smile, and she told us why she’s here. “Hello
I had just gotten home from work, exhausted. I wanted nothing more than to shower and take a nap.When I open the front door. I didn’t expect to see my parents in the living room. They drenched their faces with disappointment. I awkwardly joined them on the couch. The atmosphere felt suffocating “Um, is everything alright?”I laugh nervously “Claire Elizabeth Woods, I’m disappointed in you “Oh, this can’t be goodWhenever he uses my full name, I know he’s really mad. “Why?”I asked, as I tried to think of the reason for his disappointment.What could it possibly be ?“You haven’t been working for a full month and you’re already letting some dude finger you?, not that you should be letting anyone besides your mate do that “My cheeks burned with embarrassment. I’m not sure I understood him. “I thought you were gonna wait for your mate “This time it was mom who spoke “I am. I haven’t done anything. What are you two talking about?”Overcome with emotions, I started to cry. I cou
The sunlight escaped through my window and shone directly on my bed. Which irritated me. I need to do something about this as I wasn't ready to get up.My eyes scanned my room for a solution when it dawned on me that I haven't cleaned in a while. No work today, no friends, no plans, might as well clean my room right. I grabbed the cleaning supplies from my storage cupboard and began cleaning my room. There was a lot of trash under my bed and In the corner of my room which made me realise how depressed I actually was. My room was a pig style and I was never one to keep my surroundings dirty and untidy. I did all my laundry since I was 13 and when my mom insisted on helping I'd throw a fit. Thankfully, I'm out of that depressed state now.I owe it to my parents for saying enough is enough. Maybe I would have lost myself and my wolf completely.***A few tired hours later my room was clean and tidy, so was my bathroom too. I made sure to turn my bed away from Windsor so that I