The Doubting Gal

It had been a week and a half since the knights of Saint Christopher arrived. True to their words, they did help us, some of them tended the crops and the livestock, while the others cut fire woods and fixed crippled chattels in the convent. But there was still whispering in the halls for the sisters were yet unsure about their sincere intent.

     However, I knew that sooner, someone would mindlessly feed their sheer pretense. But not me. I had been swimming on my own cluttered thought, so after my chores, I decided to clear my head.

     Rufus might be aged, but he was still a good ride. I stole him from the stable, and because no sister was allowed to mount on a horse, unless necessary, I had to walk away first from the compound before we could run.

     The horse groaned as if he was complaining, “Oh you are tired already?”, he snorted, “Good thing you have four legs, imagine yourself with just two… Yeah old guy, very wearing, and that’s how I always feel so suck it up.” If horses could roll their eyes, I bet he would now.

     I looked back and I could still see the opening of the compound, it meant we were still visible. I could not risk it, but my calves were burning and Rufus was so eager to gallop that he could not wait another minute. So, I rode and we ran.

    He ran so fast and it made everything around us seemed like a blur, but I did not mind for I felt like a bird in flight free in a vast everything.

     The trees started to clear out, widening the view of the purely blue sky. The whole land was covered in lush grass and the only path earlier became none. We were finally afar from the convent.

      I secured my legs around the horse, and grasped his mane tightly, “Faster, boy, faster!” I demanded. He hastened more. I threw my arms and my chin up high, eyes closed, as if blindly reaching for the sky, and then slowly, I spread my limbs as the wind embraced me. It was cold, but bearable.

     I was savoring the moment, wishing it would not end, when a gush of wind stole my wimple away. It left my hair exposed and flying around. I cued the horse to stop and so he did, but the wind took the cloth farther and it seemed like a spot of stray in the clearing, so never mind.

     The time ran fast as Rufus. I knew someone would notice our short disappearance, so I decided to go. On our way back, I kept looking for my wimple, but there was no speck of black on the whole field and the sun started to set, so I halfheartedly surrendered. I just had to make sure that no one would notice my dangling red hair.

     As we arrived the vicinity of the convent, I let Rufus go. The old horse was smart enough to know where the stable was, so good for him.

     Unfortunately, I could not waltz in like he did so I had to sneak in like a burglar. I went at the back of the compound, but stone walls taller than Hana greeted me. It seemed grueling, but the good thing was, I was masked by the darkness of the night, so no one would see.      

     I climbed the tree adjacent the wall. When I got on the middle of the trunk where the branches sprout away from one another, I tip toed on the one extending beyond the partition. It was thick enough to carry both our weight, but to made sure, I still leveled my arms for balance.

     I was about to jump when I saw a shadow lurked towards the wall, towards me. Please be not Sister Rene. It was not her, but even worse. The dim of the moonlight lit Gabriel’s face. He was again grinning, “What are you doing up there, princess?” He was mocking me.  

     “I told you, it is none of your business, boy.” I put emphasis to “boy”, but he just laughed like he was feasting his eyes of something, “How did you know I am here?” I asked.

     He was now closer, “The horse. I saw you went out with him this afternoon, so when I saw him entered the stable alone, I knew there was something off. So, I followed his hooves then it led me to your prints.” He extended his hand offering me a help.

     “I do not need help from you, go away so I can jump already.” But he didn’t even budge.

     “Do you think it would be appropriate if I ask one of the older sisters to help you?” I almost lose balance as I heard what he said, “Don’t you dare, Gabriel.”.

     His grin grew wide, “You remember my name, princess.”

     “Stop calling me princess.”

    “Okay, okay. I won’t call you princess, just tell me your name then.”

     “Not a chance, boy.” I spitted with annoyance.

     “And why is that?”.

     I could not tell him that the sisters were scared, and that we were just waiting for them to slither their way to bite us, so I lied, “I just don’t know you and I don’t talk to strangers.”.

     He knew I was lying, it was well written in his face, “Are you afraid of me?” I am afraid of all of you, I wanted to say.

     But instead I reacted as if he told me that pigs could fly, and I made sure it was believable, “Seriously?”

     “Okay, you are not afraid. Tell me your name then?” But I answered him with a straight, “No.”.

     “Alright.”

     I thought he was over it, yet again, I thought wrong. He slowly placed his encircled hands over his mouth, his eyebrow aroused and his blue eyes were daring me. Are you kidding me? He was about to scream when I interrupted him with my name, “Mathilda, my name is Mathilda.”

     Gabriel did not say anything after. He just smiled, and then gave me the space I needed. I will deal with him later, I thought to myself, but first I had to leap off this creaking tree branch.

     I rounded up my remaining energy on both of my legs. I heaved a deep breath and when I felt readied, I jumped. The height caused me a grunted sound, and it seemed that no one was around to notice. But as I took my first step, I accidentally knocked on something that sounded collectively, and loudly.

      The door opposite us flew opened. I did not see who it was for Gabriel swiftly pulled me over a pile of sacks, half of my body was leaning over his. It reeked so bad, but I could still smell pine and mint on him. I could feel his warmth. I could hear his beating heart. Is he nervous? I tried moving away, but he just pulled me closer.

     “Stay still or she’ll see you.” He mouthed.    

     “This is all your fault.”  I was so enraged, but I had to bear it or that someone would see us.

     And then I felt burning in my face. Maybe it was remnants of the scorching afternoon sun, or the lingering adrenaline due to my leaping, or because of this agitating predicament. Or because I had never once in my life been held by a boy before. I did not know what was this called.

     And so, the moment I heard the creaking of the door, I freed myself of him. I quickly walked away, but he was faster.

     “Wait up.” He whispered as he reached me.

     I did not halt, “Can you stop bothering me? If you didn’t bothered me earlier, none of these would have happened. Oh, by the way, I smell like crap, so thank you.”

     He sniffed himself to confirm, “I need a bath too.”

     “Yeah, thank yourself for that.”

     “What’s your problem?” He sounded annoyed.

     “You are my problem!”

     “Just so you know, you kicked the cans, not me.”

     “So, you are saying it was my fault?” I halted this time, and my eyes shot daggers.

     But he did not avoid it, he fronted me. It seemed that he had mastered the art of expressions for he appeared to be genuine, “I am saying it was no one’s fault. Not yours nor mine, it was just an accident.”

     All of this was his fault, so I would not breath another word from him.

     I was about to blow a fuse. I would tell him plenty of reasons why all these were on him. But before I could react, he wore off his dark cloaked and covered my head with it, “Just take this, I know you can’t go inside with your hair showing. It’s a shame though…”

     “Why?”

     “Anything beautiful deserves to be seen.” He shyly answered.

     I did not know what had gotten into me, but my fist instinctively flitted on his face.