El spins to face me, eyes ablaze with fury. She crosses her arms under her breasts, giving me a healthy glimpse of them. A lump wedges in my throat. I miss sucking her boobs. Playing with them.
Can’t we fuck and make up?
She stretches her hand to the door. “You should leave.”
I cock my head, my eyes do a lazy sweep across her body. Her muscles lose some of their tension. “No.”
She scoffs. “You can’t be in here.”
“But I’m already here.”
“Brandon.”
“Elna.”
A frustrated sigh leaves her, she grabs her purse and I cover the distance before she thinks of escaping. Trapping her between my body and the sink, I trail a finger across her collarbone. She sucks in a breath and looks up to me. The heat from her body warms me, sends a burning sensation pulsing through me.
“You danced with T,” I whisper, p
We are back to zero point. I am back to living in my house. The doctors said it was okay to move Brianna so I brought her home with me. She needed to leave that place anyway. It holds bad memories.My fingers tangle in my hair as I try to make sense of the designs staring back at me. It made sense in my head until I put it down. Ed attested to its nicety or did he say that to please me? I slide down the seat, hands dangling from the sides of the swivel chair. There’s a lot of adjustments to make. But I don’t feel like doing anything.The walls of my office seem to close in on me, I loosen my tie and stagger to the girls’ empty office. The respite is short-lived as I lower myself to the couch. I squeeze a toy frog as the memory comes rushing back. El was pissed. It didn’t matter what I had to say in my defense, she was not hearing it. That woman walked right out of that place with T.Dude didn’t even flinch when El came o
The ride home is quiet. It’s always quiet but the silence leaves room for me to think. I don’t want to think.“Turn on the radio,” I tell Enzo. There’s a brief moment of hesitation before the voice of the presenter fills the air. “Thank you.”Raindrops pelt the window, rolling down to the floor. Buildings come into view as we take a turn into a residential street. A boy runs out of a brown house, his father catches him before he steps into the rain. His rambunctious laughter rings out after him. Given the chance, I am sure he will do it again.Why can’t I be a kid again? I miss the days Brendan was still Brendan and Brandon was still Brandon.“Sir?”My head raises. We are home.But the problem is the Porsche in the garage. Only one person drives a Porsche. I scamper to the house. He didn’t tell me he was coming today. Brianna is in the house. He doesn’t
“He was my brother too, you know?” Joshua continues in a whisper. Sweat breaks out on my forehead despite the cold, so I remove my jacket. “And no matter what he did, he was still my brother.” I swallow that painful truth with a deep sigh. “When I was in boarding school, he would always call. Even when they never did.” They. Our parents. I never called either. “One morning, he’s there being his usual arrogant self. The next morning, he’s not there. How in God’s name was I expected to deal with that?” His words wash over me. Long buried guilt and resentment rouses. Shame sinks its claws into my skin as I stare at his hunched frame. At his feet. At the tiles that are wet with his tears. My eyes are too dry, I can’t bring myself to share in his sorrow. The guilt has drowned other emotions. I can only watch him. “I was trying to find closure and somehow I found myself in your room.” We all lived together in Salford. It was a rule then, one we followed because we ha
Coming here is my little way of earning Joshua’s forgiveness. He didn’t ask but I want his forgiveness.I look out the window of his room to the garden with guests. My eyes follow the girls as they mingle with strange faces. They are happy to be here. They chatted nonstop on our way, bolted as soon as we got out of the car. I can’t say the same for me. And I dread every second until I have to face my parents.Joshua’s hand settles on my shoulder, he offers me a glass of wine and I set it on the windowsill. He sits across from me and we watch together. We came in this morning. If the girls told my parents I am here with them, they are doing a great job of dodging me too. I smile at Joshua. Talking to him feels good. Better than therapy. I didn’t hold back anything but he hasn’t said a word since my outburst. No accusations.“Do you forgive me?” I ask without tearing my gaze from the girls. They are danci
“I wanted to let you know Brianna woke up,” I say to Ava while picking at the material of my seat.The calm silence stretches into something so suffocating I want to bolt out of here. She’s too cool about my reappearance. If I had to deal with a client with my attitude, I would have stopped seeing them. I glance at Ava, she averts her eyes but it’s too late. She was watching me too. Her dreadlocks are gone, replaced by short brown hair that curls at her temples. I liked seeing the cowries. Made me feel better.Worry prickles my neck, I rub my hand against the back of my head and pretend her stern frown has nothing to do with me. “That’s good to hear,” she finally says. “Congratulations. I’m happy for you.”I lower my head to avoid meeting her gentle gaze. It feels like she has more to say but she’s weighing her words like I am doing. The quotes on the wall make less sense. Identify you
Everyone is watching.Bren. Wyn. Joshua. They have been watching Brianna for the last few minutes, expecting her to stir awake and probably speak. Wyn sighs first and props herself by the elbows on her side of the bed. She looks the most frustrated. I slipped and told them Brianna spoke once, now, they want her to prove it.Joshua examines the wheelchair, face pensive as his fingers trace the buttons on one side. The buttons are for fancy since Brianna can’t use them yet. Mia, her caregiver is somewhere in the house to allow us privacy with her. I slouch on the edge of the bed, face buried in my hands. Three weeks and there has been little or no improvements yet. I should be thinking about the girls birthday party. Christmas too.I haven’t even shopped for their presents.The phone in my pocket pings with a message from Jei. Wrinkles mar my forehead. He wants us to meet now. I slide the phone into my pocket without a re
The party is in full swing.Balloons. Music. Tents. Bunch of kids from the twins school with their parents in tow.From my position, the twins look to be having fun. And what is that dance? I push Brianna’s wheelchair to the window so she can have an idea what the noise is all about and a gentle breeze welcomes us.We would have stayed back at home but the twins wanted her here. There was no way I would miss their party. The party that marks their big girl-ness and entry into a new world. They don’t want to keep wearing matching dresses anymore. It’s a bit scary but I guess it’s time for them to choose their styles.A part of me hopes they don’t stick by it but judging from the heap of new clothes El bought for them, I don’t see that happening. The twins are her first models for her clothing line. The launch is next week.Tucking the blank canvas under my armpit, I drag my seat close
El stands at the door, gaze sliding between me and Mia with her nose stuck in the air. A fake smile etches on her lips as she steps inside. I see through it and muster a sheepish grin. “It’s time to cut the cake.”I send Mia a curt nod and follow behind El. As soon as we are alone in the corridor, she spins to face me. Hands resting on her hips, her pupils dilate with anger. “Now you are flirting with the caregiver, huh?”Her audacity irritates me more than her accusation. “What I do is none of your business.”“It’s my business if you are doing it where my kids are.” Laughter trickles out of my lips. She has nerves.“They are my kids too, El. I know what’s good for them.” I am so horny I will fuck a tree but if Mia had given herself up to me, I wouldn’t have touched her. It is one reason she is getting fired. I don’t want to find out if today is part of a