36: People like me

"There are two kinds of guilt: the kind that drowns you until you’re useless, and the kind that fires your soul to purpose."

~Sabaa Tahir

A knock comes to my door and I don't need to be told to know who it is. It's Eli, probably here to ask why I ran away from his birthday party which I had taken the time to organise for him. He's probably here to ask questions I am not ready to answer, he's here to see reason and probably agree with whatever excuse I give because that's the type of man that he is. He's a good man and after everything I have discovered for myself, I don't think I can keep the charades up anymore.

My loyalty is with Anna because she is in charge of my life until tomorrow when this is all over, but I can't help but think about the man who is being treated like a fool for loving so much. The man I keep lying to and treating like a fool even though he's d