2: She's Confuse

THE TREES DANCES as it seems like it's following some rhythm. The wind did not stop blowing while her long hair swayed to which way it was going. Even the leaves seem to be playing with the heavy rain that night. The angry sharp lightning that shot from the sky kept on pacing with the thunder that seemed to be at the edge of its rage. 

She smiled sadly. Even the weather went along with what she felt.

For her, everything seems okay except for one problem, and that is the way she’s going right now… 

The fog thickens as she enters the heart of the forest. She also feels that someone is watching her and follows her every move. It’s midnight but here she is, fighting in the dark, cold, and heavy rain in the forest. 

Fear runs down her spine when the wind blows as if it's hugging her body... 

“N-no… I can do this!” it seemed that no one could defeat Lirah’s desire to see her lover. She’s eager and determined. She’s ready to face what comes her way.

When she chooses to face this direction, she starts to forget her old life. She’s tired of begging for meager love from her known adoptive father who never considered her as her child. She’s tired of her adoptive mother who’s choosing everyone else before her. She could no longer force herself to be accepted by anyone if the exchange was for her to be miserable.

“There is indeed a time to give up on the things that people are fighting for,” she said while forcing herself to smile even though her eyes screamed sadness.

For her not to be hurt anymore, she has to let go of the rope of grief that she is clinging to when she sees that her late grandparents were the only ones who showed her what love really is. This is the only way for her to feel the steps for her happiness.

If she did not leave, there’s a possibility that her parents would force her to marry another old man in exchange for five carabaos and three hectares of rice fields after having a debt to Tasyo who’s angry at them after their encounter. It hurts when she thinks about it, and she knows that her mother can do it because she experienced it already and it’s a nightmare for her!

If that big black wolf hadn’t heard her plea, she couldn’t imagine where she would be right now. Just by thinking that she will be in hell at Tasyo’s side is just enough for her to have the strength to continue her decision. 

Lirah's tears fell again as she ran faster inside the forest. Even though she doesn't know where she's going, the important thing right now is that she's sure that she can save herself from a miserable situation that she will have to face at the hands of the man who will treat her like a thing.

She’s ready to face the storm that will come her way just so she won't go back to that hell place. She’s eager to be happy… she’s ready to trade everything for her happiness!

Later on, she saw that the rain slowly subsided.

The pain she felt is replaced by confusion. 

Lirah slowed down. She can’t run anymore, especially in her situation—wounded, hungry and weak.

A quiet sound of hissing made her alert to her surroundings. She feels that her heartbeat becomes faster as she remembers the reminders of her beloved late grandparents.

"Lirah, be careful inside the forest, there are many playful creatures who are lurking there," she continued imitating what her late grandfather was saying when she was little. "I'm being careful, Grandpa!" she answered immediately to herself. 

She’s trying to talk to herself which is her way to turn the fear she feels into another emotion.

She immediately stopped when she remembered her late grandmother’s reminder, “Lirah, remember, don't fall for a gorgeous man who has a pointed nose, is tall, and most of all, the one with the enchanting gaze. That's not human!" 

"Why did Abuela say that? Right! Since what grandma sees all the time looks sour and sweaty!" She is against it. "But La, I've fallen so hard. Even the ocean can’t see how deeply in love I am right now.”

“What is it again?” She tries to recall what the gossipers said. "Oh! Men here in the village don't like to take a bath!” she even winced at the last thought.

She didn't expect that on her turn she would stumble upon the large protruding tree root that made her tears fall one more time. She didn't know if she was crying because she got hurt after she fell, or if it was because of the pain from betrayal.

“My parents really betrayed me…” She should accept the fact even if it hurts. 

"Where are you? I need you... I want to see you..." every word she uttered was filled with sadness. "All I need is a little time to say goodbye to you. I'm going far away, Aro. This is the only time we can see each other. This is the last time—are you going to deny me again?"

She looks like a little girl huddled at the edge of that tree. Lirah felt that the sky accompanied her. As she cries one more time, the rain is pouring heavily again.

Lirah couldn’t help but smile when she saw the rage of the sky while observing the forest. She could not see the whole of it because of darkness. If it wasn't because of the lightning, he wouldn't be able to see anything.

“What am I to you?” she asked out of nowhere. As if there was someone who could answer her question. “This is your fault!” She shook her head a little bit because she disagreed with what she had said.

“No… this is my fault. I let you come into my world without me knowing that I’ve fallen hard. That was because of your smile! When you smiled at me, you became my world three years ago. My life changed instantly and that was because of you too! Again, it’s my fault. I knew that we weren't meant for each other but I insisted!" a hint of self-deprecation lingers in her mind.

“I am human. He belongs to a different world. He’s the alpha of his pack but I love him…” She smiled bitter-sweet despite her heartaches. “I am like a broken glass… you… you are the one who picked my piece. What can I do? You gave me unconditional love that I couldn’t find in anyone—I hate you! But why do I still love you? I must be stupid. Did I make a mistake when I chose to accept you?"

She was full of thoughts at that moment. Lirah even questioned fate. Why were they brought together by destiny if they weren't meant for each other? 

“Aro is not like a wind that will only make me feel when he wants to, right? He can be water… water that will never run out but I always need it especially when I'm thirsty and need love…”

She can’t answer her questions. Her questions were never answered...