Chapter 19: Fragmented Illusion

"I guess her fate has been decided then."

The words left Riven’s mouth quietly, but in the dead silence of the cavernous hall, they rang like the tolling of an execution bell.

He didn't look at me. He kept his golden eyes fixed on the dark stone wall above Kaelen’s head. "If this is what needs to be done to keep the order of things, then it has to be done. My personal interest will not cloud over the interest of nations. It would be… selfish of me."

The world stopped spinning. The air vanished from my lungs. The words hit me harder than any slap Kaelen had ever given me.

A violent, freezing numbness started at the base of my skull and washed down my spine, instantly paralyzing my nervous system. My body simply ceased to belong to me. My arms, holding the only thing in this world that mattered, suddenly went completely slack.

Mael slipped.

It happened in a fraction of a second, but my mind processed it in horrifying slow motion. The heavy wool cloak unravelled. My hands failed. And my three-week-old son tumbled out of my grip and hit the cold, unforgiving basalt floor.

Thud.

The sound shattered my paralysis.

A scream ripped out of my throat, raw and agonizing. I dropped to my knees so hard the impact bruised the bone, my silk dress tearing against the rough stone. I scrambled forward, my hands shaking so violently I could barely scoop him up.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Mommy's got you, I'm so sorry!" I babbled hysterically, pulling him frantically against my chest. I checked his head, his arms, my vision blurring with hot, thick tears.

Mael erupted.

He began to cry. It was a deafening, piercing wail that tore through the assembly hall. He had never cried like this before. Not when he was born, not when the clinic was freezing, not even when Maren had pressed hot medicinal stones to his chest. This was a sound of pure, unadulterated distress. It vibrated against my collarbone, an unnatural frequency that made my teeth ache.

I cradled him, rocking back and forth on my knees right there in the center of the defendant's block, my tears dropping heavily onto his flushed, screaming face.

I looked up at the dais, my vision swimming.

Riven’s face was still turned away. The god of the world. The monster who had promised to protect me. He wouldn't even look down to see the infant crying on the floor.

What the fuck was I actually thinking? The realization crashed over me, suffocating and humiliating. How deeply, pathetically delusional was I? Did I actually believe I was special? Did I think my tragic little life meant anything to a man who ruled empires? He was a warlord. He decided the fate of the earth. And I was just a broken toy he had picked up out of the mud because he was momentarily bored.

The tears streaked down my face, hot and humiliating. I pulled Mael tighter, burying my face in his wool blanket.

‘I curse you’, I thought, the prayer dark and bitter in my mind. ‘I curse the Moon Goddess. I curse whatever cruel, sadistic bitch sits in the stars and writes my fate.’ If I could stand in front of her right now, I wouldn't bow. I would rip her throat out for the endless, agonizing misery she had engineered for my life.

I forced my head up, looking around the tiered benches.

The hundreds of Alphas were relaxed. Some were leaning back in their seats, whispering to each other. The tension was gone. Not a single one of these massive, powerful men stood up for me. Not one offered an alternative. They had achieved their goal. The anomaly was being purged. The machine was fixed.

Kaelen was grinning so hard his face looked distorted. He had won. The ultimate victory. He had put the Lycan King in his place and reclaimed his property in one sweeping motion.

I looked slightly to Kaelen's left. Thorne was there. My childhood friend. The boy who used to sneak extra rations to me when Kaelen’s father starved me. Thorne was looking firmly down at his boots, his jaw tight, his eyes shining with unshed tears.

He doesn't believe anymore, I realized, my heart completely breaking.

Thorne had always sworn my wolf would come. He had whispered that she was just waiting, that she would be the most beautiful wolf in the world. Looking at his defeated posture now, the message was absolute. Even Thorne had given up.

I was returning to Frostbane. I was returning to Kaelen. And I had to be prepared to be ruined beyond all hope. I would be chained in a basement. My baby would be taken and raised as a servant—or quietly killed the moment they realized he wouldn't shift.

My tears flowed like a waterfall, soaking the collar of my dress. Riven had promised to burn the world for me. He had murmured dark, possessive vows against my skin. Empty words. Just another Alpha manipulating a weak female. He wasn't a savior; he was just a different breed of demon.

"I guess it is settled then," Kaelen’s voice echoed through the hall, thick with the arrogant satisfaction of a man who had just won the lottery.

Mael screamed louder. The sound was so intense my ears started ringing. Every time I looked at Kaelen, a terrifying, violent swing between pain and hatred seized my chest. Right now, there was no pain left. Just hatred. Pure, unadulterated, violent hatred. And my son seemed to feel it too, his cries amplifying the moment Kaelen spoke.

"Let it be known today that the Lycan King is selfless," Elder Varak announced, his booming voice cutting through the noise. "He puts the interest of the world above his own desires, exactly as he is meant to."

Varak rolled up his ancient scroll. "If it is any commiseration to the King, the full moon is only one week away. The Valrok Empire will host a gathering. The Lycan King will find himself a better mate. One who can carry the weight of the world on her shoulders. One who will be able to bear a true, powerful Lycan heir—keeping the legacy and power of our world intact. Not a defective human."

Each word was a serrated blade driving into my chest. Better mate. True heir. Defective human. I stared at Riven’s profile. Still nothing. Not a muscle twitched.

"Court is adjourned," Varak declared, striking a heavy iron rod against the stone. "Alpha Kaelen. The woman and the pup are yours. Use them as you please. Or get rid of them. Whatever pleases your spirits."

The Alphas began to stand, stretching their legs, the heavy scrape of boots on stone filling the room.

Kaelen took a step down toward the center block, his silver eyes fixed on me like a butcher looking at a carcass.

I was kneeling in the middle of a colossal hall, a pathetic, broken peanut surrounded by a flock of starving, heartless pelicans.

But then, something inside me snapped.

A physical fracture deep in the core of my chest. The agonizing pressure of fear suddenly vanished, replaced by an absolute, blinding inferno. My fate was already decided. I was going to die. Mael was going to die. I had absolutely nothing left to lose.

So why the fuck was I still acting like a pitiful bitch?

I stood up.

"You know what?" I screamed, my voice tearing through my raw throat, ricocheting off the high vaulted ceilings.

The scraping of boots abruptly stopped. Hundreds of Alphas froze, turning to look back down at the center block in confusion.

"Fuck you all!" I roared, the sheer volume of my own voice startling me, but I didn't stop. I couldn't. The dam had burst. "Fuck all of you! You are all arrogant, pathetic assholes and you will all rot in hell!"