Chapter 1

When the Maybach knocked me down, my first instinct was to get up fast, pick up the bike, and ride away.

I never expected to run into my ex like this after five years.

Shawn Lubbard got out of the car and called after me.

"After all this time, you're still out here tricking men into supporting you?"

He looked me up and down. As he put his hand on mine, it felt like he was belittling and mocking me at the same time.

Shawn's hand felt as warm as it always had, but it made me burn with anxiety.

Ever since five years ago, I had been terrified of anyone touching me like that.

I tried to pull away, but I couldn't. Shawn tugged me forward, and I nearly fell into his arms. The bike clattered to the ground.

I didn't need a mirror to know how forced my smile looked.

"Oh, what a coincidence."

"Just a coincidence? How many men have you met using that same staged crash over the years? Did you end up in their beds without trouble?"

He leaned so close that our noses almost touched. It almost looked like he wanted to kiss me.

The man who used to blush when he kissed me now humiliated me with brazen cruelty.

His fingers slid down my stomach and stopped at the most sensitive spot, which he then gripped hard.

People were walking by, and it felt as if someone might catch sight of our disgusting interaction at any moment.

My body tensed without me meaning to.

"You bring nothing but bad luck."

"Why don't you just die?"

"You're disgusting!"

I couldn't help but recall my parents' hateful words, and I began to tremble.

"No, I…" I shook my head and tried to explain, but when I looked Shawn in the eyes, it felt like someone was strangling my neck.

Back then, he had caught me and Chris Cutler in bed together.

In his eyes, I was worthless and disgusting.

"It's none of your business!"

The memories came flooding in, nearly suffocating me.

I shoved Shawn hard and jumped on the bike before fleeing in a hurry.

Our lives were on different tracks now. Since we were no longer in a relationship, we might never see each other again.

Or so I thought, until a week later…

When I saw Shawn at the company.

-

I worked at an internet company that did data work. There were about a hundred employees in total. A month earlier, we'd been bought over by a public company.

Today, everyone had been called together to welcome the new boss.

I had spent the last week pulling all-nighters on a new project proposal. I slept one or two hours a night and lived on coffee. My head was foggy.

When the director introduced Shawn as the new boss, I snapped wide awake.

I told myself we had broken up for five years. His buying the company must have had nothing to do with me.

Still, a strange unease rose within me.

When Shawn and his team arrived, the first thing he said to the director was:

"Call Fred out."

When he said my name, everybody looked at me.

My heart sank. The unease intensified.

The director called me, and I stepped forward.

Shawn said coldly and sarcastically, "You hoard the best subordinates and only produce this much work every month. Don't you feel ashamed or guilty at all?"

"I'm sorry."

He was clearly targeting me, even though I was one of the company's top performers.

I didn't argue.

Life had already ground away the proud, sharp edge I once had.

Shawn wasn't done. "This isn't charity. We want results, not apologies. Hand your project over to Steven. You're no longer the deputy project director."

With just a few words, he erased all of my effort.

After the meeting that was built around destroying me, I went to Shawn's office because I couldn't accept it.

"You think a few words from you will make me change my mind?" he asked, lounging in his chair with scorn in his eyes.

Before, he would never have treated me like this. My heart clenched, and for a second, I didn't know how to react.

Shawn spread his legs spread and leaned back. "You know better than anyone how to serve people. Need me to teach you?"

His gaze felt like a blade that cut right through me.

I clenched my fists and fought back tears. After a moment's hesitation, I started walking toward him. I knew he was doing this on purpose, but I needed the money badly.

I dropped to my knees, licked my dry lips, and trembled as I undid his belt. I lowered my head.

Shawn moaned with pleasure and suddenly pressed my head down.

His taste filled my mouth. I fought it, but the dark, nauseating memories from the past flooded in uncontrollably.

"No, please don't!"

I shoved him away and stood up, my face pale.

Shawn flinched and glared at me. "Fred!"

In his face, I could see the same twisted expression I had seen on Chris. It was a mix of fear, anger, humiliation, and disgust. All these emotions came together until my chest felt like it would explode.

After a week of sleepless nights, the aftereffects hit me hard. I grew dizzy and nauseous, my legs wobbled, and I collapsed.

Before I fell, I thought I saw Shawn's face fill with sudden alarm and concern.

But he hated me and blamed me. How could he possibly care?