Secret

"I know your jealous, Sammy. Just admit it... I wont kiss you. But you could at least say it out loud," Ares smirked, murmuring after releasing some girl who had rushed to the bathroom to fix her clothes. "I know you secretly get a rush from watching me... Do you touch yourself thinking about me? Does it feel good? Do you wish it was me making you feel good? How else do I explain finding you watching me every single time I've got a girl in my arms?"

Seriously, the thought just sickened me. I'd long since lost my small crush on the playboy. I'm still a damn virgin, and I don't touch myself. The thought grosses me out. I bet he knows it too... which is why keeps bringing it up.

Girls that had been all over my brother and Ares coming up to me and shoving me into lockers. Yelling at me. Telling me it was all my fault they got dumped. The bullying kept getting worse, and Ben and Ares didn't seem to give a damn when I'd come home crying.

I swear I had no idea what the hell they were talking about. Like I could control the hormonal teenage boys! If they were mad at Ben they should go yell at him. As for Ares... why would they think I controlled him in the first place? I didn't want anything to do with him!

I blink as I remember one night in particular.

Ares sneaking into my room one dark night, holding my hands above my head as he leaned down, caging me with his body. "Just admit you want me, Sam! We both know you want this. I'll give it to you, if you keep your mouth shut..."

I'd been frozen in panic. I didn't know what to do. I sure as hell didn't want him climbing through my window at night demanding that I tell him I want him... Is he a psycho? He has to know I don't want anything to do with him!

There was another night, another corner he caught me. It wasn't even at school or at home! I was on my own that night.

Ares had caught me coming out of the bathroom at the movie theater. His date still waiting in the ticket line, completely oblivious to the fact that her psycho date was harassing me. "Samantha, tell me you want me and I'll ditch Renee for the night. It will be our little secret."

That's when it hit me. He wanted me to be his secret. He didn't think I was good enough for anyone to know about... whatever the hell was going through his mind.

I'm not sure how that could hurt so badly when I didn't even want him in the first place. But something inside me broke, and after that day, whenever I saw him in the hallway at school, I'd run in the other direction. I could barely stand to see him with the memory if his words playing in my mind.

A secret. His dirty little secret. He didn't want our parents to know. He didn't want my brother to know. He didn't want his friends to know... He especially didn't want the girls he slept with to know. He just wanted me to be his little toy. It was all a game to him.

However, that just made him chase me. I didn't get it, and I really didn't like it. I felt like a mouse to his cat, and he would always pounce when I was most vulnerable. I was so damn tired of his stupid little games.

And it didn't end in high school. After Ben and Ares graduated that year, they went to the State University. So Ben and Ares were home every weekend... Normally with girls that couldn't keep their hands to themselves.

It wasn't until I moved 3 states away and went to school for college that I was finally able to escape them... Only to have to come back home after I graduated, completely broke and desperate.

And now, here I am, at my lowest moment of my life. Looking up into the crystal blue eyes of the man I hate most. And he is expecting me to, what? Beg for a job?

I don't think so! This was a mistake!

"No!" I finally say, gathering all my conviction. "I really don't! This is a mistake. I want nothing from you Ares Beck."