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A total prick

Author: Amie 🩋
last update Last Updated: 2026-01-08 06:46:10

JOSH

Layla gives him a soft look, tugging on his bun. “I’m enjoying that aspect, too.”

I watch them, my lungs aching. She thinks the podcast is all that matters to me, doesn’t she? Everyone does. They think all I care about is engagement and numbers.

Of course, I care about the podcast. I created it. I’ve worked for years to make it what it is. I’ll always want more listeners. But if I’m honest, that’s not why I suggested the segment.

What matters to me is helping her. The image of her, teary-eyed and red-

faced in our lounge, flashes into my head again. It makes my chest hurt.

“Why don’t you want to be seen with us both in public?” I blurt out.

She looks taken aback. “What?”

Zack frowns. “Leave her alone, man. If she doesn’t want to, she doesn’t want to.”

I close my eyes. I’ve been told a lot that when I get too intense, I come across as harsh. I never mean to.

“Of course,” I say, softening my voice. “And we’d never make you. I just want to know why. You were fine with us both taking
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  • My Three Hot Neighbors and Our Fake Date   There's only one way to find out

    JOSHLayla is silent for a moment. “Why is there a dick in here?” She asks eventually.I rub my temples. “Sinsters is an adult toy company,” I explain. “And Zack is an idiot.”“No I ain’t!” Zack says enthusiastically. “This shit is important.” He takes the box off her. “I didn’t know what toys you’ve already got, so I figured I should order you the full range. It never hurts to double up. Look.” He starts rummaging around in the box. “You got clamps. Cuffs. A bullet vibe. This one has a little rabbit head, apparently that feels really nice. A blindfold. A plug. Look, ain’t it pretty?” He pulls out a plug with a little jewelled heart on the end.Layla stares at it. “What is it meant to plug into?” She asks, her voice hoarse.Zack looks shocked. “Your butt, honey. Oh my God. You never used one of these before?”“I’ve never used any of this stuff before,” Layla says slowly. Her cheeks are pink. Gingerly, she reaches into the box and pulls out a string of silver metal balls, around the si

  • My Three Hot Neighbors and Our Fake Date   The four-way sex experience

    LAYLAJosh nods. “He has informed me on multiple occasions that having a son who runs an ‘agony aunt’ column is deeply embarrassing. But I don’t exactly care about his opinion. He’s a terrible person.”Crap. “And your mum?” I follow up, almost scared to ask. Josh doesn’t say anything, spinning his water glass between his fingers. I may be socially stunted, but I know how to take a hint, so I turn to Zack.“What about your parents?”“They don’t mind me doin’ the podcast,” he says happily. “I think they’re still kinda sad I’m not playing rugby, though. It was my dream ever since I was a kid. They were as cut up as me when I injured my knee.”“Did you have to get surgery?”“Oh, aye.” He yanks up the ankle of his dress trousers, showing me the long scar striping down the front of his knee.I trace my finger over the raised skin. “I wish I could’ve seen you play rugby.”“I’m glad you didn’t, love. I was a prick back then.”“You’re a prick now,” I say kindly. “Does it still hurt?”He smiles

  • My Three Hot Neighbors and Our Fake Date   A total prick

    JOSHLayla gives him a soft look, tugging on his bun. “I’m enjoying that aspect, too.”I watch them, my lungs aching. She thinks the podcast is all that matters to me, doesn’t she? Everyone does. They think all I care about is engagement and numbers.Of course, I care about the podcast. I created it. I’ve worked for years to make it what it is. I’ll always want more listeners. But if I’m honest, that’s not why I suggested the segment.What matters to me is helping her. The image of her, teary-eyed and red-faced in our lounge, flashes into my head again. It makes my chest hurt.“Why don’t you want to be seen with us both in public?” I blurt out.She looks taken aback. “What?”Zack frowns. “Leave her alone, man. If she doesn’t want to, she doesn’t want to.”I close my eyes. I’ve been told a lot that when I get too intense, I come across as harsh. I never mean to.“Of course,” I say, softening my voice. “And we’d never make you. I just want to know why. You were fine with us both taking

  • My Three Hot Neighbors and Our Fake Date   Come in, dinner is served

    JOSH“I know,” Zack says, as Layla steps inside the flat, wide-eyed. “He went overboard. I tried to tell him, but he wouldn’t listen.”I roll my eyes, lighting the last candle on the table and setting the matchbox down. My hands are sweating with nerves, and I slip them into my trouser pockets.Tonight, it’s my turn to pick a date. I figured, since we’ve already done a bar, a dinner date would be the next best thing. Ideally, I would’ve taken Layla to an actual restaurant, but when I asked her, she said she didn’t want to go out. So I did my best to set up a dinner date at our flat. The dining room table we never use has been covered with a white cloth. I’ve lit tapered candles and put some classical music on the record player. There’s salad in the fridge and a dish of homemade lasagne in the oven. The bouquet of roses I picked out this morning is sitting on the breakfast bar.I thought I was fully prepared, but now that Layla is standing in front of us, I’m ridiculously nervous. S

  • My Three Hot Neighbors and Our Fake Date   I think he's interested but...

    LAYLAOne week after my second episode of Three Single Guys airs, I drag myself back up the stairs of my building, utterly exhausted.It’s nine PM, and I’ve been up working since five this morning. I’ve spent all day at the warehouse unit I use to store all of my products, doing product quality checks and packing orders. My back is burning from hunching over the label address machine. My eyes are blurry from triple-checking every receipt. My fingers are sore and smudged with pink, where the colour from the pink tissue paper I use to wrap smaller items has come off.But I am very, very happy.My sales numbers have absolutely skyrocketed since the last episode of Three Single Guys came out. It’s amazing. I haven’t seen numbers this high since Christmas. Just yesterday, I had over 200 orders come in, and I’ve had to mark several items as out of stock on the website until I can get another shipment from the suppliers. I knew that being on the podcast would be good advertising. Still, I r

  • My Three Hot Neighbors and Our Fake Date   I'm turned on...

    LUKEI walk back into my bedroom and shut the door behind me, leaning my head against the wood. My heart is pounding. I can feel myself getting hard under my jeans.Jesus.I haven’t been this turned on in a long time. Years, probably. Behind my eyelids, the vision of Layla pressed up against the wall flickers in technicolour. I can still see her melting against Josh and kissing him hard.Moaning as he kisses down her neck, her cleavage practically spilling out of her low neckline. My balls throb, and I run a hand over my eyes.I need to get myself together. She’s my neighbour, for God’s sake.My phone bleeps in my pocket. I pull it out, swallowing a groan when I see Amy’s number. I’ve been ignoring her messages for months now. Ever since I got her first wedding invite shoved into my letterbox. I didn’t know what to respond, so I’ve just been putting off answering.AMY: The wedding is in five weeks, and you haven’t RSVP’d. I need an answer today. Are you coming, and are you bringing a

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