9

My hand stopped mid-air as I was picking up food.

Daniel peeled several shrimp and placed them in my bowl.

William spoke in a gentle voice: "We promised you long ago.

"But we've been busy with work, as you know."

I lowered my head as tears nearly fell.

After all these years, they still remembered.

I spoke quietly: "I have to go out of town with my professor this Saturday. I probably won't make it back in time."

Daniel continued peeling shrimp for me, the oil staining his long, slender fingers.

He replied: "Then we'll go before Saturday and come back early.

"Alaska isn't that far. We can return sooner."

I wanted to refuse but couldn't bring myself to say the words.

Deep down, I guess I still held onto a sliver of hope.

After all these years, I just couldn't forget that Christmas Eve.

My three brothers doting on me, tickets booked, promising to take me to see the Northern Lights. Our eyes full of anticipation for the future.

That night, before our parents died, before Sarah moved in, when my brothers still cared about me.

That night was the last evening of happiness I'd known in over a decade.

I could never forget that promise. It wasn't really about Alaska or even seeing the Northern Lights.

I just missed the days when I had parents and brothers who loved me.

Daniel, noticing my silence, patted my back:

"Emma, Sarah is still an outsider. We'll always be your brothers first."

My eyes misted over, my hands trembling uncontrollably. I couldn't even lift my head.

After many years, we were having a peaceful, harmonious meal again.

For a moment, I almost felt like Sarah's three years in our home had been just a bad dream.

Until dinner was almost over, and Matthew suddenly changed the subject:

"But people outside the family have different motives.

"Like Jake. You should understand what he's after by getting close to you. Don't get too involved with him."

I looked up in shock.

Matthew continued gravely: "The medical research our parents were working on before they died is about to restart. You must have heard about it.

"I reviewed the list of personnel for this research project, and Jake's name is on it.

"He probably wants to bring you along so he can extract our parents' lost research results from you and claim them as his own."

I couldn't listen anymore. I put down my chopsticks and stood up:

"Jake isn't as despicable as you think."

Matthew's pretense of warmth quickly turned cold:

"Emma, what's with that attitude! I'm your oldest brother. Would I harm you?"

Daniel stood up and patted my shoulder, but his words echoed the same sentiment:

"Once that isolated research project starts, no one knows how many years it will take.

"Jake is probably only joining to get the medical achievements. Once he has what he wants, he can find an excuse to leave anytime.

"But if he drags you in, the consequences could be disastrous. It's too dangerous. Jake might not care about your safety, but we do!

"Emma, think about what happened to our parents. I can't watch you repeat their tragedy.

"Jake is an outsider. Matthew is just looking out for you."

The ripple of warmth I'd felt in my heart completely froze over.

So this was their real reason for inviting me back.

Without hesitation, I pushed Daniel's hand away.

When I spoke, my voice was completely detached:

"Jake has already made arrangements for his family. He won't abandon the project halfway.

"Even if he did ask me to join, it would be because he values my abilities.

"Someone in this world has to make sacrifices and contributions, like our parents did, like many senior researchers and predecessors have done.

"What do you mean by 'disastrous consequences'?"

Matthew's face darkened completely: "You're just defending Jake! Would you really choose an outsider over your three brothers?"

Daniel added: "Emma, you don't need to act so righteous about this!"

I couldn't take it anymore. I grabbed my phone and left.

William, furious, swept the dishes to the floor.

The sound of breaking porcelain was jarring and startling.

I didn't stop.

I left the house and took a cab.

Not surprisingly, Daniel called the next morning.

He seemed hesitant: "Sarah still can't accept traveling with you. So..."

Just then, I received a text from Jake:

"I need to go ahead to prepare things at the new research institute. Leaving at noon today.

"We'll meet when you arrive on Saturday."

I looked at the message on my phone.

Daniel's voice continued, unusually apologetic:

"After you finish your work with your professor and return, early next year, the three of us will take you separately."

I said softly: "Okay."

Daniel was silent for a while, then suddenly asked: "Emma, how have you been lately?"

What a strange question.

Outside my window, it started to snow.

The first snow in Northridge this year seemed later than usual.

I replied: "I'm fine."

The call wasn't hung up for a long time.

I heard Daniel speak again: "Will you come home tonight?"

Matthew's somewhat stiff voice came through: "The housekeeper is back. She's making pudding tonight."

That was what twelve-year-old Emma loved to eat.

But I was twenty-two now and hadn't enjoyed sweets for years.

I tugged at the corner of my mouth: "I won't be coming back tonight."

Or ever again.

Suddenly, Sarah's startled cry came through the phone.

Then William's anxious voice: "I told you not to go in the kitchen. Let me see where you got burned."

The call was abruptly ended.

I listened to the dial tone, then after a while, my phone screen went dark.

Everything returned to silence.

I stood by the window for a long time, watching the snow fall.

Then I took out my phone and replied to Jake's message: "I'm coming with you."

I grabbed my already packed suitcase and booked the earliest available flight.

I left the university and took a taxi to the airport.

As the plane climbed thousands of feet into the air, everything in Northridge gradually disappeared from view.