07

I knew the woman intentionally didn't want to be soft on me because I was already too soft for my own good..

I lowered my gaze, my fingers tightening around the belt of my robe. "I could sneak around and see her in school. All I need is just one peek."

"That's not happening, Belly."

"I've missed her!" Tears rimmed her eyes. "They might have told her I'm dead and she might be grieving. I haven't... I haven't seen her since she was a year old. I doubt she'd even recognize me again."

And that was the most painful part. How would I ever get her to love me if she didn't know I was her mother?

Donna said nothing for a while. She simply watched me cry, her expression hard, but not empty. There was something behind her eyes, something almost tender, but she buried it before I could hold on to it.

"When the time is right, you'll see your little girl." She pushed away from the doorframe. "For now, we need to prevent anyone from seeing you until you can confidently act like Isabelle. Goodnight."

***

One of the maids seemed committed to rubbing disrespect all over my face.

Her name was Nina, and for reasons I could not understand, she had made it her personal duty to remind me that I did not belong in Isabelle Voss’s skin.

She was blatantly disobedient in the smallest, most irritating ways. She kept my things in the wrong places, shifted items I had specifically arranged, ignored parts of my routine, and somehow always managed to leave behind just enough damage to make it look like an accident.

"You poured coffee on my book and didn't even tell me," I told her one afternoon when I was about to study and noticed the huge coffee stain on one important page.

She merely shrugged. "It was a mistake."

"I—I know, but you should have told me about it."

"I'm sorry, but I have a lot of things to do in the house and tend to forget about minimal issues like this."

That was not the tone anyone should use for someone they worked for. Even I knew that. But knowing and acting were two entirely different beasts, and unfortunately, mine seemed to have gone into hiding.

What could someone like me possibly do?

Donna appeared at the door. She was dressed in a dark green gown that fell around her body, her hair swept back from her face, her mouth pressed into a line that could have cut glass. Her eyes moved from me to Nina, then to the stained page.

Nina did not even wait to be dismissed.

Donna’s gaze stayed on the ruined page, and the contempt in her eyes made heat crawl up my neck.

"She—She said it was a mistake," I muttered.

She stayed quiet for a beat, simply looking at me. The silence stretched so long it felt like it had hands. I felt three degrees of shame, each one worse than the last.

"So this is what Isabelle Voss has been reduced to. Hm? Being talked down to by rude maids." She tsked. "Never thought I'd live to see the day."

***

Despite how much I knew Belladonna would disapprove, I simply could not resist the need to see my daughter. 

In a world where everything had been ripped apart, Michelle was the only real thing I had left. The only part of me Annalise had not completely destroyed.

Back at the hospital, I had gotten the name of Michelle’s school from Annalise, although right now, I was desperately hoping she had given me the real name and not another lie. 

One afternoon, when Donna was out of the house, I got ready to leave.

My heart beat too fast the entire time, guilt and desperation wrestling inside my chest like two angry wolves.

I wrapped my hair into a tight bun, then covered my head and lower face with a black scarf. After that, I wore thick dark shades, large enough to hide my eyes completely and cover the bridge of my nose. I studied myself in the mirror, turning my face slightly from side to side.

I looked hidden. Hopefully, it was good enough.

I did not know a lot of people from my past, thanks to Kage, who had never shown me off as his mate. So really, what were the odds of running into the tiny three percent of people who might recognize me?

I was walking toward the door when I overhead voices from the kitchen. It was the rude maid and one other.

"I'm telling you, there's something different about her," Nina said. "She doesn't react when I do the wrong things. She's lost that...spark in her eyes. I know what I'm saying. It's so obvious."

"I don't doubt it," the other one said. "She's been too quiet and...a bit shy. Even the way you she dresses. She doesn't look like the fierce boss we all know. I wonder if she's going through a heartbreak or something."

"Well, could be. As for me, I'm done with this shitty family. The moon knows I hate them with everything in me. If my father hadn't been indebted to them, I wouldn't have been here wasting my youthfulness working for them."

"Don't be like that, Nina. You've only been here for three years, plus you're almost done. Less than a month to go, right?"

"Yes! And gods, I couldn't wait. The generous settlement I get to receive at the end of all these is the only thing that has truly kept me going."

"You see? The Voss family is not as bad. They are still settling you despite working to pay your father's debts."

"Oh, please. I deserve it."

I kept my head low and slipped out of the house, grateful they could not see me. Still, Nina’s words followed me out like a thorn stuck in my skin.

Why did she have to be so mean?

I made use of one of the cars Donna had given me access to in case of an emergency and drove down to Moon Pup Academy.

I arrived fifteen minutes before closing time.

My fingers stayed tight around the steering wheel as I parked a good distance away from the school gate. The scarf around my face suddenly felt too tight, the shades too heavy, and my heartbeat too loud.

Hopefully, if Annalise had been right and this was truly the children’s school, I would see my daughter today.