Another woman

INDEFINITELY.

The word echoed countlessly in my head, almost causing an explosion up there. It had just one meaning and I knew that, but I still hoped to the moon goddess that it would have a different meaning right now. Please, dear goddess. 

I didn’t wanna seem so broken and shattered by the news. At the very least, I wanted to protect my dignity and pride but I couldn’t control my tears. I couldn’t hold them in. I just couldn’t. 

How could I when I’m about to lose everything I’ve held dear all my life? How could I, when I’m being faced with the worst situation of my life?

“Baby…” Ryan whispered, reaching for my hand. I retrieved both, refusing to let him touch me. He scoffed in exhaustion and stood. 

He didn’t leave the room though. He was just pacing. 

“I’m sorry. God knows I didn’t wanna hurt you like this. I’m just in a very tight spot at the moment. There’s nothing else I can do except this.”

“Why?” I looked at him with a blurry gaze. The tears had blurred my vision. “Why is bringing her here the only choice you have? Is she blackmailing you or something?”

“Blackmailing me? She doesn’t need to blackmail me to live here. She’s my mate. She’s obligated to live here all her life.”

If I thought my heart was aching earlier, it was nothing compared to how I was feeling at the moment. It was literally bleeding now.

He just blatantly made it clear to me that she’s his fated mate. She has every right to be here. And if there’s anyone who should feel like an intruder or an impostor, then that’s me. 

Wow. How quickly one’s life can change, right? 

Just yesterday, I was the only Luna and the only woman in Ryan’s life. I was the queen of his heart. And now, I’m second fiddle to his fated mate. 

Someone, please wake me up from this nightmare. It’s too much for my poor heart to handle. 

“Baby, please don’t cry.” He tried touching me again but I shoved his hand away. 

Don’t cry? What else should I do? Yell? Smash things? I’d love to do that actually. It’ll help release this constriction I’m feeling in my chest. 

But I can’t do that. So all I can do is cry my aching heart out. All I can do is cry like some wounded puppy. 

“How…how could you hurt me like this?” I looked at him, genuinely curious to hear his reasons. 

“I’m sorry…”

“I’ve been the nicest and sweetest to you. I…I…became a great Luna for the people so you’d never have a taint in your reputation. I became such a great role model to the ladies of the pack, so you can be proud of the fact that you married a great woman. So you could brag to your peers about the fact that you made a great choice in choosing a woman. I lived such a perfect and error-free life for you. Do you know how tiring that’s been? Do you know how tiring it’s been for me? Do you know how scared I get when I make a mistake and think about the fact that it might affect you? I literally live my life for you, Ryan. How’s that not enough?! What more did you want?!”

I was yelling now. I was yanking my heart out now. There’s no gentle way to express the rage and grief I’m feeling at the moment. 

He bowed his head and I could see tears dropping. And then he looked at me and I almost gave in to the urge to comfort him. 

You hear that? I’m thinking of comforting him right now when I’m also hurting just as much. That’s how I’ve been living. I put him first, always. Every fucking time! I don’t deserve to be tossed aside so harshly. It’s unfair!

“She’s pregnant.” He confessed and I went stone-cold. “She’s carrying my heir, Larissa. How could I turn a blind eye to that?”

I went mute. Shakily mute. It was like the air got knocked out of my lungs. I was a shaky mess. My fingers dug into the couch. My lips were quivering so badly. My eyes were pouring down more tears but my words were gone. I couldn’t say anything more. 

“I’m sorry you had to find out like this. I’m sorry things turned out like this. But there’s nothing else I can do. I need to take responsibility for her and my child.”

His child. He’s having a child with her? That means…that means he’s been seeing her. This wasn’t just something recent. He found her a long time ago already and they’ve been seeing each other behind my back. 

So now he’s having his heir with her. What about our child? What about the child that I’m yet to tell him about?

“Listen, Larissa,” he crouched in front of me. “This doesn’t change anything, I promise you. You’re still the only Luna of this Pack. You’re still my only love and our bond will never shatter.”

“Really? And what about her? What’s she gonna be?”

“She…” he was struggling to answer that. “She’ll understand.”

Understand? She’s the fated mate. I’m the chosen mate. Logically, she’s the real owner of everything I own. So if he’s promising me that nothing changes and he’s still solely mine and I’m still the only Luna, then what about her?

Is she gonna be okay with me, enjoying everything that rightfully belongs to her? Really? That would be too good to be true. 

“Listen, Juliet adores you…”

Juliet? That’s her name?

“She respects you. And she’s just happy that she’ll get to be close to you. That’s all. She’s not after the things you have. She’s really not.”

Close to me? He wants me to be besties with the woman carrying his child? With the woman he’s been sleeping with? With the woman who could end my happiness with just a snap of a finger?

How heartless could he be? How stupid and lenient does he think I am? 

“She knows I love you so much. And she also knows that’s never gonna change. So please, Larissa. Don’t feel too heartbroken about this. It doesn’t change anything. I swear.”

Empty promises. They sounded just like empty promises. I knew better than believing them. But they were too sweet, my heart crushed harder wishing they were true. 

He left the room, and I fell on the couch, bawling my eyes out. 

“Ma’am,” the gentle prying voice was Anna’s. 

“You knew about this, didn’t you?” I asked, looking at her. 

She didn’t deny it. She only began sobbing. “I eavesdropped on him accidentally. He was setting a date with her. I didn’t know how to tell you.”

Of course. I understand. But God, it hurts. 

How could he treat a woman like me so messily? How? 

“I’m so sorry, Ma’am.” She bent next to the couch and slowly pulled me into her arms. 

I didn’t hesitate and hugged her back, crying my eyes out in her arms. I needed the hug so bad. I needed it to save my bleeding heart. 

“I couldn’t even tell him about our child…” I sobbed. She rubbed my back soothingly. “How could he treat me this way?”

“I’m so sorry, Ma’am…” She apologized over and over. 

But it wasn’t her I wanted an apology from. It was from him, Ryan, the man of my dreams who just set my perfect life ablaze.