CHAPTER 1

I was packing my things, feeling heavy-hearted, but there was nothing I could do because that was Grandma’s final decision.

I just sighed deeply.

“So I guess this is goodbye, my lovely room. I’ll miss you,” I said as I spoke to my room.

I hugged my pillows, witnesses to all my struggles through the years, witnesses to my tears.

“I’ll leave for now, so the family’s shame will lessen,” I whispered as I lay down.

It’s so frustrating—why did it come to this? I just wanted to have fun, but why did things turn out this way?

Suddenly, my phone rang, breaking my thoughts.

“Hello,” I answered lifelessly.

“Hey girl, why didn’t you come in!” Jen said irritably.

I rolled my eyes. This girl really loves showing off at the bar where we work.

“I’m packing. How about you, are you done packing?” I asked her.

“Since last night. Why did you rush like that? You’re really crazy,” she scolded me.

“Psh, I’m still so annoyed about what happened to me the other night,” I said, remembering everything again.

Hayss!! Astrid, stop thinking about it.

“I’ll get your last salary for our fare. Tomorrow I’ll pick you up. You have to be early because they said we’re taking the first trip,” she explained.

I was confused by what she said. What first trip was this witch talking about?

“What’s first trip?” I asked.

“I dunno, we’ll find out tomorrow anyway. Babuuu for now,” she said and hung up.

I sighed again and stood up when someone knocked on my door.

When I opened it, Nanay Pasing greeted me.

“Your mom and dad are here, they want to talk to you,” she said.

I nodded in response.

She went ahead, and I followed, already expecting another lecture from them.

“Astrid Clarisse!! You’re such a disgrace!!” Dad immediately shouted at me.

I just bowed my head and stared at the floor. I was used to hearing the same words over and over again.

I’m a disgrace. I’m the black sheep of the family.

“Are you even listening to us?” Dad asked angrily.

I looked at him seriously but didn’t speak.

“You’re old enough now, Astrid. Don’t you realize you’ll have your own family someday and you need to be responsible?” Dad said furiously.

I sighed at his words and looked away.

“You know what, Astrid, we’re so tired of your attitude. Don’t you want to get the inheritance Grandma will give you? Then work hard for it!” Mom said irritably.

I was fed up with their words, so I stood up.

“Yes, I’ll work hard!! Fine! That’s what you want, right? Then I won’t come back here once I leave this house. You don’t even know my trauma, you keep telling me what I should and shouldn’t do!” I shouted, and they fell silent.

I cried because I was overflowing with all their worthless words.

Suddenly, Grandma arrived, frowning at me.

“All those years I suffered after Grandpa died, you weren’t there!! Don’t tell me to move on just because it happened long ago. F*ck that opinion!! You don’t know the pain I’ve felt all my life. Grandpa was the only one who was always there for me because you never treated me as family, Dad! Is it because I’m your illegitimate child? Because I have a different mother? And now you blame me for being like this!!” I screamed while crying.

“Astrid!! You have no manners!!” Grandma shouted and slapped me hard.

I sobbed and wiped my tears.

I gave her a bitter smile and looked at her.

“You never treated me as your granddaughter because you saw me as a curse to this family. You never even wanted me to live here since the beginning, right??” I said to her.

“Don’t worry. I’ll just follow Grandpa’s words and take what’s mine. Once I get my inheritance, I’ll leave, and you’ll never see me again!” I shouted before storming off.

I ran to my room and slammed the door shut.

I cried hard because of everything they said to me. Ever since I came to this house, my life has been like this.

It was Popsy who took me in when I was little because my mother abandoned me.

“Sis,” Adrian—whom I call Adi—called out to me.

“Not now, Adi,” I said while crying.

“Sis, I just came to return your red bikini,” he said.

I suddenly stopped crying and opened the door.

“What are you even saying, you sound crazy,” I said, laughing.

I felt ridiculous—crying and laughing at the same time. But I was thankful I had a brother like him, who never got tired of comforting me whenever I was like this. Ever since he was little, Mommy and Daddy always left him with me because they were so busy, and Grandma was busy with the hacienda. So he grew up calling me Mommy.

“Hays, I know the words our family threw at you were super harsh. As if they never rebelled back in their day,” he said, pulling out some ice cream.

“Hays, just let it be. This will only stop once I leave this house,” I told him.

“ my sister, don’t leave me,” he said.

“I won’t leave you. I just need to work hard to get my inheritance, unlike you who already has yours,” I replied.

“That’s where you’re wrong. We’re in the same situation, always judged, but just in different ways. It hurts, but my two balls can handle all the words they throw at me,” he said, laughing.

I hit him for his nonsense. I don’t know what got into my brother that made him gay, but I couldn’t help laughing at his flamboyance.

“So what time are you leaving tomorrow?” he asked.

“That crazy girl said early,” I answered.

“Sis, don’t forget to call me. If you don’t, I’ll go to Manila to find you,” he said.

I just laughed at what he said. We grew up in the province, and we were rarely taken to Manila, so I still feel ignorant about many things there. But I admit I grew up spoiled and a bit conyo, thanks to Popsy.

We finished eating ice cream, and he slept in my room so I’d feel better.

I just hope my job will be easy. Hays.