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Choosing Myself
Last Updated:
2025-04-29 23:43:45
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Puck Me Hard apology to readers.
Hello guys! Author here! I'm so sorry about the last chapter. I would love to launch into an explanation of why that happened but the words count for "authors notes" is very limited. (But it's a honest mistake.)It won't happen again and to show I'm really sorry.I'm making the next chapter free and adding it to this note.so here.Championship Season.Dorian's P.O.VDORIANThree weeks laterI shoved the door open with my shoulder, the tiny bell jingling in that annoying, rusty way it always did. The strip mall lights outside cast long shadows across the linoleum floor. Everything smelled like synthetic pine and warm plastic—exactly like a place that sold discount dish soap and almost expired soda should.At the front desk, Susie didn’t even look up. Her eyes were glued to the little TV mounted up in the corner like a shrine. Snorting at the reindeer jacket she had on--please it looked absolutely ridiculous --I blinked, pausing halfway into the store. That was me on the screen, liftin
Last Updated : 2025-04-30Puck Me Hard Hate Me
Dorian's P.O.VIf I thought the Carter mansion looked stunning at night, it was even more ridiculous in daylight. It wasn't just an house but an estate, looking like something off a postcard. I sat behind the wheel of Susie’s tiny car, jaw slack as I stared up at the sprawling estate. Massive hedges shaped into clean-cut shapes of cherubims. The last time it had been in shapes of chess pieces or I may have been mistaken looking at it in the night. Anyway, the pillars gleamed like they were carved from marble, and a few people in uniform swarming the front lawn like busy bees, stringing up massive Christmas garlands. It was literally a whole operation. Frosted wreaths, gold-dipped reindeers, strings of lights being looped over every surface that could take them.Of course, they had a whole staff for this. Rich people didn't climb ladders to decorate their house for Christmas. It was just perfect I caught them at this time. Shit.I opened the car door and stepped out, my shoes muted
Last Updated : 2025-04-30Puck Me Hard Someone I used to be.
NoahIf you favoured Minnesota in the winter, the beautiful snow covered scape and curling up in front of a fire place with a hot whipped coffee, then you'd definitely find Miami offensive as fuck. It was less than a week to Christmas and the sun was out. It wasn’t even noon and it was already making a damn spectacle of itself, glaring down on my windshield like I owed it money. I had the AC blasting, sunglasses on, and I was still squinting like a mole dragged out of his burrow.it was insane. The only tell tale sign it was winter was definitely the over the top decorations along every single building I'm driving past and the string lights around trees that'd be lighted up at night.My phone suddenly buzzed where it was mounted on the dash, dragging me from my observation. I tapped the screen and my second bestfriend's name flashed across it. biting back a grin, I answered the call but before I could even say hello, her voice exploded through the car like a battle cry.“NOAH FUCKING
Last Updated : 2025-04-30Puck Me Hard Go Get Him
Dorian’s POV“Twenty-nine... thirty.”The bar slammed back into place with a satisfying clang, my arms trembling slightly from the weight. My chest rose and fell, slick with sweat, and I laid there on the bench for a second, staring at the ceiling of the mostly empty university gym like it had answers. It didn’t.Groaning, I wiped my face with the towel I slung over the rod, then sat up and shook out my arms. The pain was good. It kept me focused and grounded. It had only been a week and a day since I started seriously training again, but my body was already responding—bulking, hardening, becoming familiar again. Something I could control. conditioning and playing ice hockey for the last few weeks of the championship season also helped a lot.Anyhow, I made my way to the floor-length mirror at the far end of the gym, bare-chested, my joggers hanging low on my hips. My reflection stared back at me and not to be a conceited asshole but I was impressed. My arms which had begun to thin wh
Last Updated : 2025-04-30Puck Me Hard Mark?
Noah's POVChristmas Eve, and I felt like roadkill that had been rained on, run over twice, and forgotten on the side of the road. My nose was clogged, my head was pounding, and my limbs felt like they’d been stuffed with wet socks. The apartment echoed with silence and I just felt so fucking miserable..Liam had left for “practice” three days ago. Practice. On Christmas week. Sure. I wasn’t stupid. Even NHL players got time off for the holidays. But I didn’t ask questions. It was his place, not mine. He could go to Jupiter and I’d still have to be grateful for the four walls and overpriced furniture.I shuffled to the door like a corpse when the bell rang, dragging the blanket off the bed with me like it was my emotional support animal. A tissue hung out of my nostril, clutched in one hand like my last shred of dignity.I was already mentally preparing myself for the sight of a package guy or maybe Mark, here to guilt-trip me into watching Elf for the fifth time. But when I opened th
Last Updated : 2025-04-30Puck Me Hard Lunatic on Sugar
Noah's POVI woke up feeling... okay. Maybe better than okay. I felt really good than I did through out yesterday anyway. That soup must have worked wonders.My nose wasn’t a faucet anymore, and my head didn’t feel like someone had stuffed it with cotton and then shaken it around for fun. But I also woke up to an empty bed, a dry throat, and the hollow aftertaste of regret.Dorian and I had argued last night about Mark.Stupid, pointless, totally preventable fight.It wasn't that we would have shared the same bed if we hadn't gotten into that fight, but at least, we won't be keeping malice with each other.Honestly it was my fault. He’d asked who Mark was after I let the name slip, and instead of just saying he was a friend, which, let’s be honest, wouldn’t have been a lie, I played the game of poking the bear. Because some pathetic part of me still wanted Dorian to care enough to get jealous. I wanted...no, needed to see that fire in his eyes, the reminder that maybe I still matter
Last Updated : 2025-05-04Puck Me Hard Kiss Me, Dorian.
Noah's P.O.VIt took me two hours. Two entire cold, hellish hours in Miami’s glitziest district, where ninety percent of the designer boutiques were either closed for the holidays or by appointment only, and the few open ones were selling garish silk scarves and overpriced tins of cookies that screamed pretentious. But finally, by some miracle, I found the perfect gift. It was silver, understated but elegant. The kind of watch Dorian could wear and not feel like he was trying too hard, but still look like he ran shit. I just hoped he wouldn't be able to tell how expensive it was, because knowing that stubborn Hayes Pride, he'd probably shove it back at me if he did. God, that pride. It drove me up the wall and made my chest ache in equal measure. I'd almost blown a gasket when I saw he'd returned the phone I bought him.Well here's hoping he doesn't notice.I didn’t bother with fancy wrapping and just grabbed the stupid red box with a silver ribbon offered to me from the lady at the
Last Updated : 2025-05-05Puck Me Hard Hi, Captain
Noah’s P.O.V“Hey Faggots!”I stiffened, forcing my hands to keep untying my skates as if I hadn’t heard it. The noises of the room—laughter, shouting, clang of lockers as they slammed it shut—kept going. Nobody even flinched. It was just a normal joke from Matt, one of my defensemen who thought anything that came out of his mouth was comedy gold. The dude was built like a fucking tank and sometimes, I wondered if that was all he was. Brute force with an empty skull.A few of the other guys joined in, tossing back their own crude jokes as they stripped off sweat-soaked jerseys and peeled away pads.My fingers kept trembling, but I worked the laces faster, hoping no one noticed. The worst thing you could do in this locker room was stop, freeze up, and let them see how the words hit you. That was blood in the water, and these guys were sharks who didn’t know how to leave a wounded animal alone. Usually, I didn’t care about the jokes, hell I joined in most times, but it just felt fucking
Last Updated : 2024-12-27
Latest chapter
Puck Me Hard Kiss Me, Dorian.
Noah's P.O.VIt took me two hours. Two entire cold, hellish hours in Miami’s glitziest district, where ninety percent of the designer boutiques were either closed for the holidays or by appointment only, and the few open ones were selling garish silk scarves and overpriced tins of cookies that screamed pretentious. But finally, by some miracle, I found the perfect gift. It was silver, understated but elegant. The kind of watch Dorian could wear and not feel like he was trying too hard, but still look like he ran shit. I just hoped he wouldn't be able to tell how expensive it was, because knowing that stubborn Hayes Pride, he'd probably shove it back at me if he did. God, that pride. It drove me up the wall and made my chest ache in equal measure. I'd almost blown a gasket when I saw he'd returned the phone I bought him.Well here's hoping he doesn't notice.I didn’t bother with fancy wrapping and just grabbed the stupid red box with a silver ribbon offered to me from the lady at the
Puck Me Hard Lunatic on Sugar
Noah's POVI woke up feeling... okay. Maybe better than okay. I felt really good than I did through out yesterday anyway. That soup must have worked wonders.My nose wasn’t a faucet anymore, and my head didn’t feel like someone had stuffed it with cotton and then shaken it around for fun. But I also woke up to an empty bed, a dry throat, and the hollow aftertaste of regret.Dorian and I had argued last night about Mark.Stupid, pointless, totally preventable fight.It wasn't that we would have shared the same bed if we hadn't gotten into that fight, but at least, we won't be keeping malice with each other.Honestly it was my fault. He’d asked who Mark was after I let the name slip, and instead of just saying he was a friend, which, let’s be honest, wouldn’t have been a lie, I played the game of poking the bear. Because some pathetic part of me still wanted Dorian to care enough to get jealous. I wanted...no, needed to see that fire in his eyes, the reminder that maybe I still matter
Puck Me Hard Mark?
Noah's POVChristmas Eve, and I felt like roadkill that had been rained on, run over twice, and forgotten on the side of the road. My nose was clogged, my head was pounding, and my limbs felt like they’d been stuffed with wet socks. The apartment echoed with silence and I just felt so fucking miserable..Liam had left for “practice” three days ago. Practice. On Christmas week. Sure. I wasn’t stupid. Even NHL players got time off for the holidays. But I didn’t ask questions. It was his place, not mine. He could go to Jupiter and I’d still have to be grateful for the four walls and overpriced furniture.I shuffled to the door like a corpse when the bell rang, dragging the blanket off the bed with me like it was my emotional support animal. A tissue hung out of my nostril, clutched in one hand like my last shred of dignity.I was already mentally preparing myself for the sight of a package guy or maybe Mark, here to guilt-trip me into watching Elf for the fifth time. But when I opened th
Puck Me Hard Go Get Him
Dorian’s POV“Twenty-nine... thirty.”The bar slammed back into place with a satisfying clang, my arms trembling slightly from the weight. My chest rose and fell, slick with sweat, and I laid there on the bench for a second, staring at the ceiling of the mostly empty university gym like it had answers. It didn’t.Groaning, I wiped my face with the towel I slung over the rod, then sat up and shook out my arms. The pain was good. It kept me focused and grounded. It had only been a week and a day since I started seriously training again, but my body was already responding—bulking, hardening, becoming familiar again. Something I could control. conditioning and playing ice hockey for the last few weeks of the championship season also helped a lot.Anyhow, I made my way to the floor-length mirror at the far end of the gym, bare-chested, my joggers hanging low on my hips. My reflection stared back at me and not to be a conceited asshole but I was impressed. My arms which had begun to thin wh
Puck Me Hard Someone I used to be.
NoahIf you favoured Minnesota in the winter, the beautiful snow covered scape and curling up in front of a fire place with a hot whipped coffee, then you'd definitely find Miami offensive as fuck. It was less than a week to Christmas and the sun was out. It wasn’t even noon and it was already making a damn spectacle of itself, glaring down on my windshield like I owed it money. I had the AC blasting, sunglasses on, and I was still squinting like a mole dragged out of his burrow.it was insane. The only tell tale sign it was winter was definitely the over the top decorations along every single building I'm driving past and the string lights around trees that'd be lighted up at night.My phone suddenly buzzed where it was mounted on the dash, dragging me from my observation. I tapped the screen and my second bestfriend's name flashed across it. biting back a grin, I answered the call but before I could even say hello, her voice exploded through the car like a battle cry.“NOAH FUCKING
Puck Me Hard Hate Me
Dorian's P.O.VIf I thought the Carter mansion looked stunning at night, it was even more ridiculous in daylight. It wasn't just an house but an estate, looking like something off a postcard. I sat behind the wheel of Susie’s tiny car, jaw slack as I stared up at the sprawling estate. Massive hedges shaped into clean-cut shapes of cherubims. The last time it had been in shapes of chess pieces or I may have been mistaken looking at it in the night. Anyway, the pillars gleamed like they were carved from marble, and a few people in uniform swarming the front lawn like busy bees, stringing up massive Christmas garlands. It was literally a whole operation. Frosted wreaths, gold-dipped reindeers, strings of lights being looped over every surface that could take them.Of course, they had a whole staff for this. Rich people didn't climb ladders to decorate their house for Christmas. It was just perfect I caught them at this time. Shit.I opened the car door and stepped out, my shoes muted
Puck Me Hard apology to readers.
Hello guys! Author here! I'm so sorry about the last chapter. I would love to launch into an explanation of why that happened but the words count for "authors notes" is very limited. (But it's a honest mistake.)It won't happen again and to show I'm really sorry.I'm making the next chapter free and adding it to this note.so here.Championship Season.Dorian's P.O.VDORIANThree weeks laterI shoved the door open with my shoulder, the tiny bell jingling in that annoying, rusty way it always did. The strip mall lights outside cast long shadows across the linoleum floor. Everything smelled like synthetic pine and warm plastic—exactly like a place that sold discount dish soap and almost expired soda should.At the front desk, Susie didn’t even look up. Her eyes were glued to the little TV mounted up in the corner like a shrine. Snorting at the reindeer jacket she had on--please it looked absolutely ridiculous --I blinked, pausing halfway into the store. That was me on the screen, liftin
Puck Me Hard Choosing Myself
Noah's P.O.V The long drive from campus to my home felt like a slow trek to my own execution. By the time I pulled up to the front of my family’s mansion, the same looming, white-stoned fortress I'd grown up in, it had gotten even darker. My tires crunched over the long winding driveway which was filled with floodlights along the stone paths down which cut through the Late night November darkness. I killed the engine, and left my hands on the steering wheel, breathing in and out. For a second, I just sat there, staring up at the massive house like it was about to swallow me whole. It was like a giant beast carved into hill, the many floor-to-ceiling glass windows reflecting lights causing the house to glow all by itself. Beside me, Dorian whistled low from the passenger seat. "Jesus," he muttered, turning to me with raised brows. "You lived here your whole life?" He shoved the door and stepped out, craning his neck to take it all in; the ivy wrapped columns, the massive lak doors
Puck Me Hard Choosing Myself
Noah's P.O.VThe long drive from campus to my home felt like a slow trek to my own execution. By the time I pulled up to the front of my family’s mansion, the same looming, white-stoned fortress I'd grown up in, it had gotten even darker. My tires crunched over the long winding driveway which was filled with floodlights along the stone paths down which cut through the Late night November darkness.I killed the engine, and left my hands on the steering wheel, breathing in and out. For a second, I just sat there, staring up at the massive house like it was about to swallow me whole. It was like a giant beast carved into hill, the many floor-to-ceiling glass windows reflecting lights causing the house to glow all by itself.Beside me, Dorian whistled low from the passenger seat."Jesus," he muttered, turning to me with raised brows. "You lived here your whole life?" He shoved the door and stepped out, craning his neck to take it all in; the ivy wrapped columns, the massive lak doors and
