Wars Behind Doors

It was a morning in which the sun shone bright yet the lights of which my heart emitted, dimmed down.

I yawned and stretched as placed my feet down on the floor and stepped towards the bath.

I had planned today for something. I was going to ask my father to somehow stop the marriage and then I would finally place the request of me marrying the person from the best of my dreams.

Getting out of the bath as I had asked Mrs. Hanzah to bring a simple dress--I was not in the mood to wear colors and dresses with many layers pilling upon each other. I saw her in the corner of my eye bring the corset and dress towards me--she looked quite happy today.

As she was tying the corset on my body, I asked her, "Mrs. Hanzah, something happened today? Your mood seems to be happier than the usual form of it." To which she replied, "I am getting a day off to be with my family tomorrow, princess." while smiling she did what she had to do while dressing me up.

I had happiness above the bars for her. She had four children--two boys and the rest were girls.

I sat on the seat of my dresser as I put on a piece of jewelry. Mrs. Hanzah came towards me with her hairbrush to style and bedazzle my hair but I was not feeling the best today as of what happened yesterday. So, I got up from the chair--didn't even bother to wear the slippers and rushed towards mother and father's bedroom.

Knocking on the frail wooden door as I received a reply from my mother's gentle and honey-like voice, "You are allowed to enter."

I creaked the door open as I saw mother and father having a sorrowful conversation--But father looked like he was apologizing for something of which I did not have any kind of information about. They looked at me as I sat on the side of the bed quickly.

"Father, I have a request.", I said as he looked at me and nodded as he wanted to know what my request was about. "Father, I do not at all want to marry the Prince Egon--I just can not father. Did you not at all see how he had looked at me? I had felt violated! And do you not know the age difference that comes between us?! FOURTEEN YEARS FATHER! --", I got interrupted as a harsh slap made its way towards my face. It was so harsh that my face tilted to the side.

I looked up to my mother with eyes that were filled with shock and tears as she stared at me in shock at what had just happened while my father just stared at me with anger dripping down from his eyes.

"I have already made my decision Arah. You are my flesh and blood, but despite that--you are still a woman, know your place. And take my advice, never interrupt Prince Egon--Your soon-to-be husband like this. Women are nothing but just a thing used for pleasure for men, and you, my dear, are a woman. Accept what is reality.", father explained as I just stared at him wide-eyed.

I was always there for him--I had always acted like a son just for behavior like this?! Helping him in his decisions like how his nobles could not even do.

This was straight-up treachery and for what reasons? Being born as a woman?

For many years, women have been looked down upon for them having a gender that God had gifted to them as a human with rights.

I at least had worth. I wasn't the one under the name of housewives or useless girls--I was the mighty Princess of Caldorus, because of my existence Caldorus had healed after what father had done almost three decades ago.

I grew up to be my father's right hand. I helped him and his kingdom with everything and now, he was giving me away to a Prince who has a kingdom known for brutality?!

Azaleth was known to not respect women at all, neither their queens nor princesses. I did not expect them to be sweet nor kind towards me.

I saw father standing up from the side of the bed and slamming the door shut on his way back outside the room.

Mother was just looking at me with pain quite visible in her eyes. "Arah, go back to your room.", she said to which I was devastated. Did I not deserve to at least feel the warmth of my mother's embrace after a mountain of sadness and shock had dropped down upon me?

I stood up from the side of the bed and made my way towards the door as I hurried outside, and then marched my way back inside of my own room.

I reached in front of the door of my room as I opened it and made my way inside. I was devastated. I went towards my bed and knelt to grab my dearest diary.

After I had my diary in hand, I sat on my study table and started to write about what I had planned for tomorrow--a plan that would decide upon the future of mine--a plan that contained a bit of sadness at the start but that plan would result into the happiest of days.

Dear Diary,

I had a day filled with devastation today--it was truly treacherous, at least for me.

I had requested my father in the evening to cancel out the wedding of mine with Prince Egon but he just replied to my questions with a slap across my face and the most disgusting answer that there was.

His words are still echoing in the walls of my mind.

I do not know why he said that I was a useless woman though I had acted like a son to him for the utmost of my life.

I always suggested and told him what to do with the kingdom and I am right now the reason why Caldorus is known as the most developed kingdom after Dajoah--but he responded to my desires and needs like this?!

I feel betrayed.

I have decided to run away from the Kingdom--it is a risky and dangerous idea but at least I know that I would not die like the useless queen of Azaleth.

It truly pains me that I would have to leave my mother but I have to do what is right for me and the Kingdom of Caldorus. I would have married Egon if the threat to our kingdom was much but I knew that I was to be the bait that would be used by Azaleth to capture Caldorus. If I run away, Azaleth will back off from ambushing a war on us as there would be no reason to do so.

Tomorrow Mrs.Hanzah is leaving for her family which means that I have no one to pay such close attention to.

I will leave at dawn because the guards would be not paying that much attention--they were humans after all. I will leave saying that I am going to take a stroll in the garden.

I have not thought much of what I will do after that but I will soon.

Though for now, I am going to sleep.

I closed the page as I yawned while thinking about me fleeing from this wrecked facility.

I did not realize when sleep had taken over me.