Chapter 6: Silver POV

Once the door has shut I ran to the big bed, I had enough of all these bad news, starting with the one who was suppose to wait for me like I was waiting, how could he do this to me, I fell on the bed, hugging tight the pillow I hide under the covers like the child I knew I was, crying while I’m angry, being angry at the stupid things, and every last thing that makes me such a horrible person.

My mate had walked slowly behind me when he spoke so kindly as he did in front of Luna Gold, and Cathy. “I’m sorry, I know my words mean nothing when you have been my mate all this time but I swear to the goddess I wasn’t aware, if I did I would have taken the Sex Ed, the mate classes but I didn't take those classes because I was well, doing the actual deed, and that might have been worse.” I didn’t reply I just started crying harder, he got the hint that he made it worse when he then added, “I swear this is the worst choice I had ever taken in my entire life Silver, I swear if I could take it all back and wait I would, but I can’t change my past, so please give me a chance to prove to you that I love you. That I value our bond. Let me help us find the answers to this. I want my mate back where she belongs, in her body, which from what I saw, is the most amazing body I had ever seen.”

He adds a small growl, making me cry my last tears slowly, he loved my body that was being controlled by the Luna, he saw how I really looked like, and wanted me back to my body, trying to open my eyes hurt, when I finally did open my eyes to see anything he was standing there with a scared expression, getting up a little I clean my face with the sleeve of the dress.

Alpha Stan carefully moved his hand with a box of tissues, “I don't want you to ruin your beautiful day with more bad news, I want to be able to give you a smile at least, I won’t keep saying a thing that isn’t true to you, I’m sorry for this, and I will keep saying I’m sorry with my actions as well if it’s okay with you I want to explain, not to be forgiven but to be heard.” I nodded knowing what he meant, it’s how I tell the other omegas in the pack house, taking the box of tissues I added for him kindly. “A problem can’t be solved by just saying sorry, and if I don’t know the entire story what can be changed to fix the problem? Or at least to start working on it. But do you want me? I’m an omega not a Luna by blood.” I asked again trembling in fear of his rejection.

He walked closer to me, then stopped at the bedside, “Can I please sit next to you? My wolf has been going insane being close but not close enough to appreciate you,” I blink knowing a blush on my face it’s on its way, my wolf hasn’t stopped begging me to hug our mate, I nodded then he sat next to me holding my free hand, his chest rose in contempt, I wanted to stop crying but the pain was much more than just being left without a mate, it was so much more.

Luna Gold had no idea how much I too wanted pups, I never had a normal childhood, I never once had the love and affection of a parent that wasn’t Catherina, I wanted to keep crying under the covers but Alpha Stan spoke instead, hushing me with his sweet voice, “this is going to be one of the hardest conversations I have had in the longest of times, but I finally get to come clean to my mate, my fated mate.” He places his forehead to mine as he starts to speak, I can smell his intoxicating aroma, it was wired to me that I could now smell him but then I realized why, blinking fast I said, “You smell like lemon Lysol, the kind omegas use when we clean, and” I took a deep breath of his aroma which made me purred, “mint chocolate chip, it’s delicious,” I said out loud but wasn’t expecting the Alpha to nuzzle me after I had spoken, I stiffen the moment he did this action.

“You smell the same as the Luna but the sparks gave you away, maybe it’s her lotion and stuff that she uses but it suits you, it’s peaches and avocado smells, I find it more potent in you now that I think about it,” my cheeks felt like iron was placed on them, my Alpha was my mate, and he wanted me.

He was smelling me to hopefully have me permanently his, he was marking what belonged to him with his scent, that idea started to grow in my mind, and I had almost lost sight of what I was doing when I shook my head, Alpha Stan chuckled at my antics, then added, “Okay to explain it the way it was, I was a horn dog growing up, I never took the sex class, or the mate classes because I left it all in the hands of my Beta and my parents to tell me when I met.” He paused for a member thinking on how to say the next words which I found sweet of him to do, he was being considerate of how to talk to me with delicate conversations instead of blurring it all like I had no feelings.

“Let’s call her Gold Bitch for now,” I giggled at his choice of words but they were almost accurate, he kept talking after I had giggled, “I had a brother, Sid, who died from a rogue attack. I had no idea he was the Gold Bitches fated mate, and I felt bad he died when I woke up but I also knew that I had no other choice, I had to be Alpha no matter what, and well Gold Bitch had to be acting Luna now that her parents had died. We were friends when she suggested grabbing a cup of coffee which led us to get to know each other, and I needed a Luna, but I was stupid to think a Luna by blood was what I needed. I never knew that choosing a mate meant I could have also lost my fated mate, if I did I wouldn’t have acted on those choices. But now I want to end these things because I want you.” He finished by pulling me a bit closer to him , kissing my forehead i purred.

Alpha Stan wanted me, he really is trying to be with me but the pain stings me still, thinking about these things he starts again, “I’m not a the moon goddess but maybe we can learn something to start getting you back to your body, do you remember the words she said exactly? The Moon Goddess I mean?” I tried to think about everything he had just said when I felt the need to ask questions.

He took my hands and pressed them on his lips, kissing them tenderly, I purred a whimper at his action, it was the sweetest thing, “or do you have questions for me? Silver ask me anything you want, and I will gladly answer them, even if it’s not what we want to hear,” I let out a sad sobbing sigh of air to then ask, “can I have a pen and a notebook? I work best with a list in my hands than in my mind.”

He kisses my hands one more time before he left to get me one when he asked me a series of questions. “Do you like a normal notebook or are you a notebook collector? Cause there’s a series of colors and patterns, and I would love to know what my mate loves, I don’t want to give her any less than what she likes, or maybe I’m just thinking about the omegas from a general perspective,” he stopped thinking about what he said when I growled, another omega?

Standing from the bed I put my hands on my hips, “Another omega? Who else have you been with?” I shout annoyed, and he looked my way in pure desire, he was taken off guard by what I said it seemed because he then said, “You are jealous about other omegas? My Silver I would never do my stupid action ever again, I’d rather cut my junk than fucking hurt you like this, and I know I still am but please see that I’m trying here, I just don’t know what you like, and also I’m loyal to my mate, Gold was my chosen mate but I never strayed away from her in loyalty, and I will be supper glued to you as my fated mate” he tried to soften the anger in me, and it was slowly working.

He wanted to know because he held five different notebooks, all of which made me want to see them. I was a book nerd, I loved to write, to read, and it was my favorite pass time, I saw a cute one that had embedded gold flowers decorating the brown cover, and small words notebook embedded on the front, I took this one for what we where going to do. Then looked around for another one that had silver designs, and I found one with a maroon colored cover with roses drawn with only silver lines, “perfect, these will do,” I told Alpha Stan who took the rest away back to their bookcase, “I take it you love books?” He asked me attentively, “Yes, it’s my favorite pass time, I enjoy the quiet, the peace of being in my mind to enjoy what is written but not seen, after all the things I have to see on a day-to-day basis,” he took my hand and kissed it like a gentleman.