65. (DEIRK POV)

(DEIRK POV)

Finally, I pulled away from the kiss, though everything in me wanted to stay locked in that moment forever.

Percy whispered, "We don't have to take it any further. This must be difficult for you."

I shook my head and said, "No, it's not about me. I'm scared for you."

Percy chuckled. "I'm not exactly a newbie here, you know."

"No, listen," I insisted, needing him to understand. "Remember how I said I thought I was in love with Dane? Well, he didn't feel the same way, and eventually, we realized my feelings were tied to the forced intimacy we had to endure for so long. In an effort to figure it out, we tried to make it work. It was the only time I ever had sex willingly, but it didn't go well. He ended up having to pin me down for hours after because of my reaction."

Percy took my hands in his. "You're not there anymore. You're here with me."

I nodded slowly. "I know. It's just… Magness twisted so much of what I understood about love and intimacy. I'm terrified of repe