Chapter 3

CHAPTER THREE: 

QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS

Nyx POV 

"Sit."

Derrick's office was exactly how I remembered it. Dark wood furniture, bookshelves lining the walls, a massive desk covered in pack documents. The only difference was the coldness in the air, like warmth which it once had, had been sucked out of the room completely leaving no trace. 

I sat in the chair across from his desk, very aware of the two guards standing by the door. Vieve leaned against the wall, her silver eyes never leaving me.

Derrick stood by the window, his back to me. Morning light made his black hair shine. I remembered running my fingers through that hair, remembered how soft it felt.

Stop it, I told myself. That was before. This is now.

"You said you wanted to join my pack." His voice was flat, emotionless. "Why?"

"I told you. I need a home."

"There are other packs. Smaller ones. Friendlier ones." He turned around, and those blue eyes pinned me in place. "Why choose the pack with the strictest no-rogue policy in the region?"

Because this is my pack, I wanted to say that. Because I helped build this place. Because I loved these people.

"Maybe I like a challenge," I said instead.

Vieve laughed, but it wasn't a nice sound. "Challenges usually end in death here, rogue. Especially for someone with your attitude."

I ignored her, keeping my eyes on Derrick. "Ask me whatever you want. I have nothing to hide."

That was a lie. I was hiding everything.

Derrick sat down at his desk, lacing his fingers together. "Where were you born?"

I'd prepared for this. Elder Mergan had helped me create a whole fake history. "Moonstone Pack, up north. Small pack, about fifty members."

"Why did you leave?"

"The pack was destroyed by hunters when I was fifteen. I've been on my own ever since." The lie tasted bitter on my tongue.

"Ten years as a rogue." Derrick's eyebrow raised. "Most rogues go feral after five year without a pack. How did you survive?."

"I'm not most rogues."

"Clearly." His eyes traveled over me, and I felt the mate bond pull tighter. He felt it too, I could see it in the way his jaw clenched. "Who taught you to fight?"

"I taught myself. You learn fast when your life literally depends on it."

"Show me."

I blinked. "What?"

"Show me." Derrick stood up. "If you want to join this pack, you need to prove you're strong enough to be part of the pack. We'll spar. Now."

"Derrick, is that really necessary?" Vieve pushed off the wall. "We should just execute her and be done with it. All these are unnecessary"

"Why?" I looked at her directly for the first time. "Do I make you nervous? Are you treathened by my presence?."

Her eyes flashed with anger. "You're a rogue. Rogues make everyone nervous."

"I make you nervous," I corrected. "Specifically you."

"How dare you…."

"Enough." Derrick's Alpha command filled the room. Both Vieve and I felt the weight of it, the power that made our wolves want to submit. "Vieve, leave us."

"But…."

"Now."

Vieve's face went red, but she couldn't disobey a direct command. She shot me a look that promised pain later, then stormed out.

Once she was gone, the tension in the room shifted. It was just Derrick and me now, with the mate bond humming between us like a live wire.

"You shouldn't antagonize her," Derrick said quietly. "Vieve has a lot of influence in this pack."

"I'm not afraid of her."

"You should be." He moved around the desk, coming closer. "She doesn't like threats."

"And I'm a threat?"

"Yes." He stopped right in front of me. Close enough that I could smell his scent, feel his warmth. "Your presence threaten everything."

My breath caught. "How?"

Instead of answering, he held out his hand. "Come. Let's see if you are worthy of been a member of my pack."

---

The training grounds were full of pack members doing morning exercises. Everyone stopped when we walked out.

"Alpha Derrick's going to spar with the rogue!"

"She's dead."

"No way she lasts thirty seconds."

I ignored the whispers and followed Derrick to the center ring. He pulled off his shirt, revealing muscles and scars I remembered tracing with my fingers in another life.

Focus, I told myself. He's not yours anymore and you can never be his again. 

"Rules are simple," Derrick said. "First one to submit loses. No claws, no teeth. Just strength and skill."

"That's fine with me."

We circled each other. The pack formed a ring around us, watching with hungry eyes. They wanted to see me fail. Wanted to see their Alpha destroy the rogue who dared enter their territory.

Let them watch.

Derrick moved first, fast as lightning. He was testing me, seeing how I'd react. I blocked his punch and countered with a kick he barely dodged.

His eyes widened slightly. "Not bad."

"I warned you. I'm not most rogues. I'm different"

We moved again, faster this time. He was stronger, but I was quicker. I knew his fighting style because I'd trained with him for years. I knew he favored his right side after an old injury. Knew he always followed a high punch with a low kick.

I used that knowledge now, ducking under his arm and sweeping his legs. He went down hard, and the crowd gasped.

But Derrick was an Alpha. He rolled and came back up, eyes blazing with something that looked almost like... excitement? Surprise? 

"Where did you learn to fight like that?" he demanded.

I couldn't tell him I learned from him. "I told you. I taught myself."

"Impossible. That's a technique from…." He stopped. His face went pale. "That's Lora's move."

My heart stopped.

No. No, no, no. I've blown my cover. 

"I don't know what you're talking about." I backed up a step. I had to clear my mistakes now before it gets out of hand. 

"The leg sweep combined with the shoulder roll." Derrick moved toward me, his voice rough. "Only one person ever fought like that. Lora created that move. She..." He swallowed hard. "She tried to teach me, but I could never get it right."

The crowd was silent now, watching this exchange with wide eyes.

"Maybe she wasn't the only one who figured it out," I said desperately.

"No." Derrick was right in front of me now, his blue eyes searching mine like he could see straight through to my soul. "I watched her develop that move over months. I watched her perfect it. The exact combination, the exact timing, it was hers. Only hers"

His hand reached out, almost touching my face. I could feel the heat from his palm.

"Who are you?" he whispered.

The mate bond flared between us, stronger than ever. My wolf howled, wanting to tell him everything. Wanting to throw myself into his arms and explain that I was here, I was alive, I was….

"I'm Nyx Brooks." I stepped back, breaking whatever moment we were having. "Just a rogue who learned to fight. Maybe I saw your Luna train once. Maybe I learned from watching. Does it matter?"

"Yes." His hand dropped. "It matters."

"Why? She's dead?."

I regretted the words immediately it left my lips. Derrick's face twisted with pain so raw it made my chest ache.

"Yes, she is dead, " he said quietly. "Because I killed her."

The crowd shifted uncomfortably. This wasn't something their Alpha ever talked about.

"You didn't kill her," I said before I could stop myself. "The executioner did."

"I might as well have held the blade myself." Derrick turned away. "I let them execute my mate. I listened to lies instead of trusting my bond. I failed her in every possible way."

My hands were shaking. This was what I wanted, wasn't it? For him to suffer? For him to regret? For him to feel the pain I felt?. 

So why did it hurt so much to hear it from him?

"The spar's over," Derrick announced to the crowd. "Get back to training."

The pack members dispersed slowly, clearly disappointed that the fight had ended so quickly.

Beta Martin approached, his amber eyes knowing. "That was interesting."

"Shut up, Martin," Derrick growled.

"Just saying. You haven't trained with anyone since Lora died. And now you're sparring with a rogue who fights exactly like….”

"I said shut up."

Martin held up his hands. "Fine. But Vieve's not going to be happy about this."

"I don't care what Vieve thinks."

"Since when?" Martin's voice was sharp. "You've let her run this pack for three months. You've let her make decisions you never would have allowed before. And now suddenly you care about a rogue who appeared out of nowhere?"

"That's enough, Beta."

The Alpha command in Derrick's voice made Martin's wolf submit, but his human side looked furious.

"Fine. Do what you want." Martin shot me a look that said *we'll talk later*, then walked away.

Derrick and I stood alone in the training ring.

"I want you to stay," he said suddenly.

"What?"

"In the pack. I want you to stay." He ran a hand through his hair, looking frustrated. "I don't know why. Maybe I'm going crazy. Maybe grief has finally broken me. But something about you..." He looked at me with those blue eyes that had haunted my dreams. "Something about you makes me feel alive again."

It was the mate bond. He was feeling the mate bond.

"I can't stay," I said. "Your sister wants me dead. Half your pack wants me dead. And you..." I swallowed hard. "You barely know me. Why do you now want me to stay?."

"I want to know you." He stepped closer. "Give me a chance."

This was wrong. Everything about this was wrong. He didn't want to know Nyx. He wanted to know the ghost of Lora that he saw in me. This is going to spoil my plans. 

"Why?" I asked. "Why do you care?"

Derrick was quiet for a long moment. Then, so softly I almost didn't hear: "Because when I look at you, for the first time in three months, I feel alive."

My breath caught. The mate bond pulled so hard it physically hurt.

"One week," I heard myself say. "Give me one week to prove I can be useful to the pack. If I can't, I'll leave on my own."

"Deal." Relief flooded his face. "I'll assign you to training duties. You'll work with Beta Martin and……"

"No." I thought fast. "Let me work in the pack house. Cleaning, organizing, whatever. I want to learn about the pack from the inside."

And search for evidence against Vieve, but I couldn't say that part.

Derrick frowned. "That's omega work. You're clearly a warrior."

"I'm a rogue trying to join a pack. I should start at the bottom and work my way up." I met his eyes. "Unless you're afraid of what I might find?"

"Find?" His eyebrow raised. "What would you find?"

*Your sister's secrets*, I thought. *Proof of her lies. Justice for Lora.*

"Nothing," I said out loud. "Just a figure of speech."

He studied me for another long moment. Then nodded. "Fine. One week. You'll report to Elder Thorne each morning for your assignments."

"Thank you, Alpha."

I turned to leave, but his voice stopped me.

"Nyx?"

I looked back.

"Stay away from Vieve," he said seriously. "She's dangerous when she feels threatened. And for some reason, you threaten her."

"I'll be careful."

"I mean it. I can't..." He stopped. Started again. "I can't lose another…."

He didn't finish the sentence. But I heard it anyway.

*I can't lose another mate.*

The words hung in the air between us as I walked away, my heart breaking into smaller and smaller pieces with every step I made away from him.