8: First Encounter Again

Sofia

The sudden knock on the door jolted me awake, my heart still thrumming from a dream I couldn’t quite grasp, only the lingering heat and a shameful, unfamiliar sensation that pulsed deep within me.

I groaned and went for the door, I saw Clara’s cheerful face peering in. “Morning, sleepyhead! How was your night?”

“Fine, Clara, just fine,” I mumbled, pulling the sheet higher, a flush creeping up my neck. The memory of the dream still lingered even though I had taken a drink last night to help with the hotness I felt, I couldn’t just dismiss how vague, wet warmth it was, it was still too vivid, too mortifying not to remember. “I’m just going to have my bath.”

I practically fled to the bathroom without waiting for her reply, the moment I stepped into the bathroom I took off my clothes and I stood naked under the warm water.

I couldn’t help the thoughts that came rushing in. What was wrong with me? Why did my mind keep straying to such… ungodly things? The image of the man, his touch, and his lips were all a tangled mess of sin and confusion. Something like this had never happened before. I had never had such a dream before, and it was worse because of how vivid and real it felt.

After my bath, wrapped in a towel, I stepped out of the bathroom and found Clara already settled on her bed, laptop open. “Come on, Sofia! I found the perfect rom-com. You need a little cheer.”

“I was planning on sleeping throughout the day,” I groaned and Clara looked up from her system to talk to me.

“You just woke up from sleep Sofia, you are not going back to bed so join me.” She insisted and reluctantly joined her, pulling on a conservative long-sleeved nightgown.

The movie started, a lighthearted tale of love and mishaps, but then I saw a kiss scene. My breath hitched at the sudden rush of heat, the phantom press of lips… The intoxicating kiss I had in the car, flooded my senses. I squeezed my eyes shut for a moment, then looked away, pretending to be engrossed in a nail I was picking.

“You’re awfully quiet, Sofia,” Clara’s voice was gently perceptive. “Is everything alright?”

“Yes, I’m fine,” I lied again, my voice a little too strained.

Clara paused the movie, turning to face me fully. Her gaze was kind and unwavering. “Sofia, you know you can tell me anything. I won’t judge you, I promise.”

I was quiet for a while thinking if I could ever share the thoughts in my head with anyone, but there was no one else I knew I could actually share the thoughts with except her, “Clara… how does it feel… to want to do bad things?” I asked in a small voice

Clara blinked, then a soft smile touched her lips. “Bad things? What kind of bad things?” She paused, then her eyes widened slightly. “Are you asking about… being horny?”

My face flamed. I nodded, barely. “Yes, that.”

Clara let out a small, warm laugh, and the sound, instead of making me feel more exposed, strangely lightened the suffocating shame. “Sofia, honey, it’s not ‘bad things.’ It’s a normal thing. Every grown adult, unless something is medically wrong, experiences those kinds of desires. It’s part of being human.”

Normal? My parents had taught me it was forbidden. The thought alone was a sin, a doorway to damnation. “But… my parents say it’s forbidden. That even thinking about it… It’s a sin.”

Clara sighed, a mix of pity and exasperation on her face. “Sofia, your parents are… very conservative. Our bodies are designed for connection. Attraction and desire are natural. It’s how the world keeps spinning. The sin, as I understand it, is in hurting others, in deceit, in malice. Not in experiencing something so fundamental to our being.” She reached out, patting my hand gently. “It’s okay, Sofia. You’re not doing anything wrong just by feeling what you feel.”

Her words somewhat soothed me, if this was normal, what else had I been taught that wasn't entirely true? I quickly shook my head remembering that Clara is a worldly person and I shouldn’t let her words get to me, my parents are right and always right.

Just then, my phone started ringing, I picked it up and it was an unfamiliar number. I wondered who was calling me so I snatched it up, excusing myself as I practically sprinted back to the bathroom, closing the door behind me.

“Hello?” I whispered, my voice tight.

“Sofia Chris?” A deep, resonant voice, unmistakably male, sent a shiver down my spine, it sounded so familiar.

“Who is this?” My heart began to pound.

“Do you remember the man from the club the other night?”

My breath caught and I gasped, how did he end up getting my contact? Without another thought, my finger jabbed the red ‘end call’ button. I stared at the phone, my hand trembling, then quickly fumbled to block the number. How? How did he get my number? My mind raced, trying to find a logical explanation, but none came. Everything was pointing to the mistake that I had made, I should have stayed back at home that night.

I tried to compose myself, taking deep breaths, before stepping back into the room. “Wrong number,” I muttered to Clara, forcing a smile.

It didn't take ten minutes. My phone bleeped again, a notification for a new message, my stomach dropped. It was from another number and my hands shook as I opened it.

“Come outside, now. I’m in front of your hostel or I’m coming in myself.”

The blood drained from my face. He wasn't just persistent, he was terrifying. The casual menace in his words, the sheer audacity of him showing up here, at my hostel, where I was supposed to be safe. My mind conjured images of him walking through the lobby, demanding to see me, drawing attention to himself, to me. Louis… what if Louis saw him? What if anyone from my church group saw him? My reputation, my family’s standing, everything would be ruined.

“Clara, I… I have to go,” I stammered, scrambling to my feet. “I… uh… just remembered I have to meet someone.” My voice was too high, too panicked.

Clara’s brow furrowed, but before she could question me further, I was out of the room, half-running down the stairs, fear propelling me forward. I burst through the main doors of the hostel and there it was, an impossibly sleek, expensive black car, gleaming under the morning sun. And standing beside it, leaning casually against the polished fender, was he.

He was wearing black on black, a custom-tailored suit that hugged his broad shoulders, making him look impossibly dangerous and undeniably powerful. His raven hair was styled perfectly, a few strands falling artfully across his forehead. He had sunglasses perched on the bridge of his nose, but even through them, I could feel the intensity of his gaze as he straightened, a slow, predatory smirk spreading across his handsome face.

He was an embodiment of everything my parents warned me against, a walking, breathing sin, and yet… I couldn't tear my eyes away. The "shirtless distractions" Clara had joked about felt less like a joke and more like a warning, because even fully clothed, he exerted a raw, magnetic pull.

As I stepped closer, my voice shaking, the first thing I blurted out was, “You need to leave, now. Get away from my hostel.”

He laughed. It was a sound of amusement, but also of absolute control. He pushed off the car, taking a step towards me, his eyes now visible, dark and piercing. “That’s not going to happen, sunshine” His voice sounded like a threat. “You have two choices. You can get into my car, and we can talk. Or,” he paused, letting his gaze sweep deliberately over the hostel building, “everyone gets to know about me and you.”

A cold dread seized me. He was threatening to expose me, to show everyone the one mistake I have made since the beginning of my life. My mind flashed to Louis, to my father, to the elders at church. I felt trapped, I was scared that Louis might appear from one of the windows, or that someone might walk out, I quickly, reluctantly, agreed.

“Fine,” I choked out, my voice barely audible. “Fine. I will get in the car.”

He smiled, a triumphant, wicked flash of white teeth. And then, he opened the passenger door, gesturing for me to enter, “You look hot in your nightie, sunshine,” he commented while I stepped into the car and my eyes widened, remembering I wasn’t wearing something proper, I had just ran out of my hostel without the thought of changing into something better, I tried to defend myself but my words were stuck on my throat and it seems to enjoy my perplexed state.

I felt violated.